


The High Priest's Memories

by LucyLightwood



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence, I will probably give Atem a body, M/M, Mutual Pining, Past Character Death, Reincarnation, Repressed Memories, Teasing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-19
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2020-01-16 08:32:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 48,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18517765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LucyLightwood/pseuds/LucyLightwood
Summary: Kaiba didn't want to have strange dreams, he didn't need them. But they were there. Even if there was no point in dreaming of something that had, surely, never happened.Yugi didn't expect to be invited to a private location around the world. The same way he didn't expect Kaiba to acknowledge the Pharaoh's existence.





	1. Introductions

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first yu-gi-oh fanfiction, despite the fact that this was the first fandom I ever read a fanfic of (I was... like 12?). I discovered The Dark Side of Dimensions the other day and... I've fallen for this and I can't get up. Help?
> 
> Fair warning: I'm currently re-watching the show because I don't remember a lot of stuff.

"My brother wanted to be here to welcome you, but something came up"

Everything about the invitation had been strange but what wasn't strange in his life nowadays? Not that he cared much. Despite everything that had happened between them, he trusted Kaiba. Or at least he trusted him enough to know he wouldn't harm him in any way. He had started to think of the young CEO as a friend, even if the feeling wasn't reciprocated. There were times when he thought Kaiba might see him - _them_ \- as more than just a rival, but there were other times when...

"That's alright, Mokuba. Do you know why he wanted me here?"

True, the invitation had been for him alone, but his friends found the way to go as well. There was no way in hell that Kaiba didn't know that was going to happen, so Yuugi didn't resist too much. Besides, being invited to a house on the other side of the world wasn't exactly normal.

The young Kaiba smiled and nodded once, but didn't elaborate further. The only reason they could think of Kaiba wanting him there  was a duel. It would be a lie to say that didn't excite Yuugi -and the Pharaoh-, there was something special when they dueled. It wasn't like dueling anyone else. He could feel his body vibrate with every move, every card. The pharaoh kept saying it was because Kaiba was a worthy adversary, but sometimes Yuugi wondered if there was something else. Something they couldn't see.

"You live here?" Anzu asked, wide eyed. The house wasn't a house at all, it was more like a manor. Tall and imposing. Somehow like Kaiba, but nothing like him at the same time. Yuugi had a hard time imagining him living in there.

"No" Mokuba walked up the main entrance stairs, opening the glass doors and lead them inside "This is for vacations only, so nobody really comes here" He shrugged and Yuugi nodded. He couldn't imagine Kaiba on vacation, his work was his life. Not healthy, but... he could understand it. And understand why he did it. "Let me show you around"

While the young boy lead them through the place, Jonouchi and Anzu kept commenting about how huge everything was. And they were right. There was an arcade, a cinema and two whole kitchens and... Yuugi suspected the number of bedrooms would scare him. Something told him Kaiba was somewhere inside that maze of a house, but he didn't know where or how to find him. Most importantly, he didn't know why he was there at all. Did he want to duel? Why not find him and set up something in a better location? Why fly them all the way there?

"There's a pool outside, the stables can't be used at the moment and-..."

"Mokuba, I think this place is big enough"

"Sorry, my brother told me to show you everything in case he wasn't present"

**_Yuugi, do you think we should be worried?_ **

_No, Kaiba has come a long way._

**_Hm._ **

"Why here? I mean, we flew all the way here... for a duel?"

Mokuba shrugged "Seto said it was really important to have you here" He meant Yuugi, but he tried to disguise it as 'all of you'. "There are enough rooms for all of you here, on the second floor"

Yuugi nodded with a smile, the boy was incredibly well behaved for his age and for everything the brothers had gone through. He didn't have the whole story, of course, but he knew enough. Jonouchi and Honda raced each other to the pool, which surprised no one. Anzu, on the other hand, was hesitant to relax.

"Are you worried?"

She frowned for a moment and smiled "No, we've been in weirder situations, haven't we?"

Yuugi chuckled and nodded "Yes, we have. Are you going to join them outside?"

"No, I'm too tired... you?"

"Hm, I'm going to try and find my room."

She waved slightly and started walking down one of the corridors. How could anyone live in a house this big? Yuugi couldn't imagine himself living in there, feeling all alone in those huge rooms. True, he had forgotten how it was to feel lonely since having the soul of the Pharaoh joining him in his adventures. His mind was the home of two, but he didn't care. It was... it was good. He... couldn't put it into words, and sometimes he was scared of thinking too much about it, afraid the Pharaoh would hear his thoughts. He didn't want to make things strange between them.

And he wanted to keep a minimum of privacy for _some_ of his thoughts.  

**_We should go look for him_ **

Yuugi pressed his lips together, placing his travel bag over a double bed. He wasn't quite sure which room was supposed to be his own, but every door he opened had a room that, to him, looked the same. So he trusted his partner to pick one. It wasn't like anyone else was in that place.

The invitation had been short and to the point, but it had implied he would spend some time there. The reason? unknown.

_I'm too tired_

**_Okay_ **

**

The alarm clock next to his bed let him know it was three past midnight, there was no reason to be awake at that hour but he was. He had fallen asleep almost immediately once he touched the bed, extremely tired from flying. And now he was awake. Too late. Or too early. Or both.

Yuugi sat on the bed feeling his mouth and throat completely dry, and decided to go find a glass of water. It wouldn't be easy, giving how he had already forgotten the location of the kitchen and he had never been in that house before. His friends were all, probably, fast asleep. He wondered if they had had any sort of dinner. Had they seen Kaiba? Had he greeted them or send them away?

He already knew they were coming, not only because they were inseparable, but Kaiba had paid for their plane tickets anyway. It had been a surprise finding out at the airport that all of their expenses were paid -including Jonouchi's-. But Kaiba hadn't been the same in a long time, and perhaps this was important.

Could a duel be _this_ important?

It wasn't easy to find the kitchen, but he did. There was an eerie feeling to it, empty like that. He tried not to think about it while crossing the threshold. His hand searched for the light switch on the wall, wondering if Kaiba had his incredible technology in the house as well and perhaps the lights turned on with... a command or something.

"Keep the lights off"

He tried not to be surprised by the voice, but only then -and with his eyes slightly adjusted to the darkness- he saw a familiar silhouette, sitting on the kitchen table. His elbows were on the table and he was half-holding his head with his fingers. Yuugi couldn't quite see his expression but he imagined he had a frown.

"Kaiba?"

" _Which_ one of you am I talking to?"

 Silence.

**_Let me handle this_ **

_Why do you think he's accepting there's two of us now? He's negated it all this time._

Yuugi didn't put much of a fight, letting the Pharaoh take over. After all, he had a way of dealing with Kaiba that seemed to work.

"You were talking to Yuugi, but _I_ was listening as well"

He walked towards the table, placing a hand on the free chair, eyes locked on Kaiba. His blue eyes found him but he didn't invite him to sit.

" _Pharaoh_ "

"Yes"

There was a small groan, and he wondered why.

"How should I call you?"

"I-" He stopped for a moment, he didn't know his name, and he wasn't sure why he was asking. Kaiba had never been interested in knowing what was going on with him and Yuugi, or figuring it out anything about the past. A past he suspected they had shared. "I've been called many names. Pharaoh, Yami..."

"Yuugi?"

"Yes, but that's my aibou's name. We share it sometimes, the same way we share his body"

"Sit down"

It was an order, not an invitation so he didn't sit. The pharaoh crossed his arms and stared down at him, a frown on his face as well. He wasn't someone to be ordered around, or treated any lesser than. He knew Kaiba knew this, and he also knew the CEO liked it when he was defiant.

_What do you think's going on?_

**_He seems conflicted somehow. Perhaps he has spoken to Ishizu? Maybe she got through to him._ **

"Is this why you called us here? To ask questions about me and Yuugi?"

Kaiba didn't look down, but he didn't got up either. There was something in the way he was sitting there, in the dark. The pharaoh could see he was tired, and tense. But when was Kaiba not tense?

"We will have a duel" He stated. Again, another order. Yuugi never wanted to harm anyone, he was a good soul, but _he_ on the other hand wasn't the same. Sometimes he... felt something dark deep within. He had changed, of course. Yuugi had changed him, he had made him a better man - _soul_?-.

"Oh?"

"But that's not the whole reason"

And now he stood up, he had forgotten how tall Kaiba actually was. It might intimidate other men, but it made something move inside his chest that he couldn't quite pin down. He didn't have much time to think about anything like that, there were more pressing matters. Someone was always in danger, or _something_. And in the middle of all of that, he wanted to remember who he was. He was always yearning for more.

"Then what is, Kaiba?"

"Not now" He turned to leave, which made him reach out instinctively. He didn't do those sort of things, but somehow he didn't want him to leave. He wanted answers, he wanted to talk to him and... and what?

" _Don't you touch me_ " Kaiba spoke through gritted teeth, making him pull away almost instantly. He didn't know what had made him react like that. True, Kaiba didn't like to be touched much, and he had only ever seen him hug his little brother but... he had only touched his sleeve.

The pharaoh resisted the urge to stare at his own hand, to make sure there wasn't anything there that could have harmed the other man. Kaiba didn't even look back, and walked out of the room.

_Do you think he is remembering?_

His heart skipped a beat and he had to hold onto the chair for a brief moment. No one could be sure, but the other man on that old Egyptian slate looked like Kaiba. He even used the Blue Eyes White Dragon and... they all suspected it was him. It made sense, in more ways than one. But what if what his aibou asked was true? What if Kaiba had started to remember? Remember the past, his name, whatever had led them to duel...

**_I hope he has._ **

_Are you sure?_

**_What do you mean?_ **

_It might not be good for him. You know he doesn't believe in anything and... he seemed drained._

**_I trust him._ **

_But-_

**_Let's talk later, aibou. We should sleep._ **

 

 

 


	2. The Duel

Breakfast was served in the dining room, on a table made to serve at least ten people. Yuugi wondered if Kaiba hosted important events in this house, or if it was truly for vacations he never took. As far as he had seen, the house was unlived in, almost as if they were the only ones using the place in a long time.

Mokuba had been a great host, trying to keep them distracted about his brother's absence. Yami convinced him not to tell their friends about the late night meeting with Kaiba, it would do no one no good and it would rise distrust. He was sure the CEO didn't want to hurt any of them anyway.

"Morning"

The conversation stopped, and they all turned their heads towards the door, where Kaiba stood. With the light of day, he could see him clearly. He was wearing all black clothes, that were clearly expensive but looked informal. Yuugi could feel the pharaoh's presence, aware of what was going on. He always seemed to be interested with anything involving Kaiba.

"Thank you for having us here, this place is incredible"  Anzu tried, smiling but guarding her words. Yuugi could see she wasn't completely sold on this new _Kaiba is a friend_ idea.

He only gave her a nod, turning his attention to his brother -for whom he smiled- and then to Yuugi.

"Do you have a moment?"

**_He will want to duel_ **

"Brother, you should eat somet-"

"Mokuba" Kaiba talked in a warning voice, the one reserved for parents telling their children to not push their luck. "I'll have lunch later. This will only be a moment"

There was no point in avoiding the moment, and Yuugi wanted to speak to him again.

"No, only him" Kaiba said, raising a hand to stop Yuugi's friends from following them.

No one was too happy about it, but he smiled to try and calm their worries."I'll be fine"

Mokuba whispered some words to the others, to try and soothe them, but Yuugi couldn't hear them. He was too focused following Kaiba out of the dining room and through the huge house.

**_Yuugi, let me-_ **

_Of course._

"Where are we going, Kaiba?"

Seto opened a door that looked exactly the same as all the others in the hall, and made him a gesture for him to walk through it. Yami wasn't scared, so he walked through the threshold, finding himself in a small office with one wall filled to the brim of books. He wasn't sure if Kaiba had time to read all of that, or if he had already done so.

There was a fireplace and a table in front of it, with Kaiba's deck on top. So they would have a duel, the old way.

Yami tried to find Yuugi to comment on the situation, but found only silence inside his mind. It had taken some training, but they were able to tune out the other entirely at will now. If Yuugi needed some privacy, he could go inside his own space inside Yuugi's mind to let him be. And apparently, Yuugi was able to do the same for him.

"A duel, Kaiba? Of course" He sat down, crossing one leg above the other and pulled out his deck. The other man followed suit, eyes intense.

"4000 life points, normal rules" He said, shuffling his cards with his hands.

Yami shuffled his own deck, not worrying about Kaiba's cards, he wasn't a cheater.  

The duel started as any other, but their usual banter wasn't quite there. Yami wondered why, and he kept throwing glances at Kaiba, trying to bring him back to their usual attitude. Not that he liked to fight with him, but during duels it was more like... teasing. And he liked that. It made him feel something. _Feel_. Like he was alive again.

Yami barely tilted his head, staring at the cards in front of them. Having a duel the old way wasn't the norm anymore, not with Kaiba's technology available. It was a nice change of pace. But there was something worrying the pharaoh. The duel had progressed so much they now had half their life points left, their 'signature' monsters on the field. Not only did it not feel the same as it usually did, Kaiba was quieter. There was still banter, one that Yami wasn't afraid to admit to himself he liked, but Kaiba kept glancing at his cards with something in his eyes he couldn't quite pin down.

Being invited to his office and dueling him next to a fireplace felt incredibly intimate. To make it all worse -better?-, Yuugi had completely left him to play this duel on his own. That wasn't strange, as it sometimes happened, but Yuugi usually said something to him, or was half present in _most duels_. Especially with Kaiba. But this time? Did his aibou know something he did not? Sometimes he wondered how someone so young could be so... perceptive.

"Is something wrong, Kaiba? If your head's not in the d-"

"I'm fine"  He seemed more relaxed than last night, true, but even without the holograms this was a duel between the both of them. "Why do you use the Black Magician?"

Odd.

"I trust him"

Kaiba frowned, without looking at him, completely focused on both cards. Without the lively animations, they seemed dead to Kaiba, but Yami knew they were alive. More than ever.

" _It._ It's not a _him_ "

"Why? Because he's called a _monster_ in this game?"

"No" Kaiba looked up, those piercing blue eyes... "Because _it_ is a card in a _card game_ "

Hm. How to make him understand? He had been adamant about the cards not having souls. But maybe if he was starting to acknowledge him as someone separate from Yuugi, he was ready to understand this as well.

"The monsters have souls. The Black Magician has saved me more times than I could count. And he knows I would do the same for him"

He couldn't read him, or his eyes, but there was something in them, a fire he hadn't seen before. It wasn't like the fire next to them in the fireplace, it was a cold fire, the kind that would burn you like ice. Kaiba reminded him of the Blue Eyes White Dragon, more than he could express. Did he realize it? Had life made him that way or was it... something else?

Yami looked down at the Blue Eyes on the field and pointed at it, not to attack but to make his rival stare as well.

"Why do you use Blue Eyes? It's not the most powerful card, is it? And you are all about power, Kaiba"

"Perhaps"

"You could've changed your strategy any time you wanted to try and defeat me. You haven't. It's not that you don't have any other powerful cards, Kaiba, you _trust_ Blue Eyes"

Kaiba crossed his arms, making his black shirt tighten slightly to his skin. Despite being a thin man, he seemed to have some muscle under his clothes and Yami wondered how good he would do on a fight.

It was Kaiba's turn, but he seemed to be holding onto his cards, not entirely focused on his next move. He would lie if he said he wasn't disappointed. Dueling Kaiba always entailed a thrill, but right now he was getting increasingly worried as turns passed. Not that he was easy to defeat, quite the opposite, but Yami was sure he would make a mistake sooner rather than later.

"I set a card face down and end my turn"

Why didn't he attack with his Blue Eyes? Hm.

"You believe there's a reason why I'm _attached_ to my dragon. There isn't."

"Oh? Then I'm sure you won't mind if I send it to the graveyard"

Kaiba frowned, but allowed the turn to happen, there was nothing he could do. The pharaoh used some of the cards on his side of the field to increase the power of his Dark Magician and destroy the Blue Eyes. Kaiba didn't activate his face down card, which made him grow suspicious. What was under there?

"I'll win on the next turn" Yami said with a smirk, but it faltered when he realized Kaiba's eyes were locked on his 'cemetery' pile. The Blue Eyes was right there, was it about the dragon? What was going on? He knew Kaiba was close to his dragon, the same way he was to his Magician, but he had never shown any sort of _affection_ for the card. Not like this.

The young CEO closed his eyes for a moment and smiled, taking a moment to enjoy the duel. It would be easy to tease him about it, but it was a sight to behold and Yami kept quiet.

"This duel is far from over" He placed two more cards face down and a monster on defense. "You say you were a Pharaoh, yes?"

" _Hm_. Why?"

Kaiba didn't answer and the rest of the duel happened in silence. Their banter was something Yami enjoyed so much, he was surprised it didn't bother him not having it this time. There was something intimate about this duel, something he wished he understood. If Kaiba was getting his memories back, did it mean anything to him? Did it mean he was going to remember sooner than he thought?

True, he was close to finding his own memories. He had the cards he needed and he knew where to go. Still, he had waited for so long... This was his last stop before understanding who he was, who he had been.

"You win"

Despite having lost, Kaiba had a small smile on his face, eyes locked on his. How far he had come, from being furious at losing against him, to simply enjoying a duel by the fireplace. Yami felt nostalgic, for something he didn't remember. What would happen once he got his memories? This life he had, it wouldn't last. He hoped Kaiba understood, when the time came.

"You didn't invite me here of all places for a duel, Kaiba. What do you want?"

Kaiba shrugged, slightly raising his hands. A playful gleam to his gaze. "Maybe I wanted to mess with you"

"No, you didn't" the Pharaoh placed his deck to a side, not standing up from his chair. It was incredibly comfortable. "You wanted to talk to me, didn't you? About your memories. Ishizu talked to you, are you willing to believe now?"

Kaiba's eyes went up and down his body, but he didn't feel uncomfortable or vulnerable, he just arched an eyebrow in response.

"Is Yuugi listening?"

"No, we are alone"

"Good. Even if what you and Ishtar say is true, it changes nothing"

How could it not change anything? Recovering his memories, his _name,_ was everything to him.

"Something already changed, you invited me here" the pharaoh carefully tucked his deck inside its leather box "Would you have done it if nothing had changed?"

Kaiba didn't answer, simply following his movements with his eyes. They were stubborn, and for a moment Yami wondered if Yuugi wouldn't be more well equipped to deal with this type of tension. His aibou didn't appear, or speak to him. Apparently he believed the pharaoh was the one that had to deal with Kaiba.

"I invited you because..." He paused, carefully shuffling his deck of cards. Yami couldn't help but notice how big his hands were, in contrast to his own, Kaiba had long slender fingers. Those of a pianist, or _well_ , a duelist. "I wondered if you were forcing dreams on me with that... thing of yours. I wanted to demand you to stop, but you are doing no such thing, hm?"

The pharaoh shook his head, starting to feel worried for him. Dreams? They _could_ be memories, or something darker. He didn't want anything bad to happen to Kaiba.

"Dreams? About your past? Our past?"

Kaiba nodded once, but his face betrayed nothing. If he was scared or angry, it didn't show. Was he worried? Did he believe?

"They make little to no sense to me, and there's no point of having them. I know who I am, I've worked hard to get here. Do you know who _you_ are?"

Ugh, low blow. Yami smirked, shrugging with one shoulder. "I know who I am, even if I don't have all of my memories, or even my name. You might not believe in souls, Kaiba, but I do"

"So you believe I'm the same person you think you knew 3000 years ago?"

"I don't know. What I do know is that if it's you on that slate, you have a connection to Blue Eyes. One that, I suspect, you understand now"

Kaiba looked at the cards in his hands, spreading them and searching for the mentioned one. The connection was obvious, and right then Kaiba was the only one that knew the reason of it.

"You expect me to share?"

Yami smiled "No, but you brought me here to talk. After all, you are still here"

"Hypothetically speaking" Kaiba started, placing one of his cards over the table, face down "let's say I know who I was, and what my relationship to you was. Let's say I can never recall your name in said dreams, but-"

This wasn't a surprise, no one seemed to know his name because apparently it was the key. It was a smart thing to do, but a hurtful one. "My name was hidden, that much I know"

"From everything? Including other people's memories? Don't you think Ishtar thought _I_ could help _you_?"

"Is that why I'm here? Because of Ishizu?"

Kaiba chuckled, looking away and placing two more cards face down "No, it's not. Pick one"

The pharaoh looked down at the three cards, frowning "What are you playing?" No answer. He reached out and chose the one on the left, flipping it over so both of them could see what it was.

_Thirst for Compensation_  
  
"Fitting" Kaiba got up from the table, picking up the remainder of his cards "I have work to do, Pharaoh, I've already wasted too much time here. I'll-" He paused, his back turned to him.

"I won our duel, picked your card" He said, standing up as well "at least tell me _something_ "

Kaiba moved very slightly, his back turned to him.

"The soul connected to my Blue Eyes. I know who she was"

"She?" No answer, Kaiba just walked towards the door "Wait, Seto-"

And he was gone, just like that. He could've gone after him, but he didn't. He had been the one summoned there -no, invited-, he had been the one challenged to a duel, he wasn't going to be the one running after Kaiba.

His mind ran through what he had said, the soul connected to Blue Eyes was that of a _she,_ a woman. Who could that be? He was confused and yearning for more information, but at the same time there was something else. A feeling he didn't remember having before, something that made his lips press into a thin line: _jealousy_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't promise I'll update so quickly all the time, but for the moment this is burning in my head and I HAVE to write it down. Also, I've realized that as I progress on a story, my chapters start becoming longer and longer so it takes me a bit more time x)
> 
> Hope you are liking this!


	3. Weight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

The weight on his arms was real, almost as much as the feeling of despair. If he tried, he could think of several moments in his life when that feeling had been present. He had worked hard to not be in a position where someone could leave him feeling like that, alone, empty, abandoned. He hadn't expected to have a dream so harrowing. Was his mind failing him? Playing tricks? It couldn't be, not with how brilliant he was.

Seto poured water on his face, the cold wiping away some dry tears he didn't remember crying.

It wasn't real, he thought, gripping the sink with both of his hands. The dream - _nightmare? Memory?_ \- would fade as the day went on, as they all did, but he had to push through the first hours.

"Damn it-" Seto clenched his teeth, closing his eyes and hunching slightly.

He could still feel it... The weight of the Pharaoh's body between his arms, lifeless. He could still hear his own pleas, to the pharaoh, to the gods. The dreams were just pieces and he couldn't get a complete picture of... The past? No, that was all lies. He knew who he was. He had done a lot to be where he was. Sacrificed too much.

"I'm Kaiba Seto" He spoke through gritted teeth, knuckles white "and that was only a dream"

He straightened his back, staring at his reflection in the mirror, bags had started to form underneath his eyes. Tsk, Mokuba would worry.

Slowly but surely, he got off his sleeping clothes and showered. He knew it was a dream, but the idea of holding his lifeless body made an invisible hand twist his heart inside out.

_It's not real, it's not real._

The dreams needed to stop. They were becoming a problem, and he had bigger, more important things to take care of.

There was a knock on the door right when he finished buttoning up his shirt. He had chosen a blue suit with a white shirt. Caring about his clothes was part of being who he was, it wasn't vanity, not really. Seto wasn't delusional, he knew he was handsome, he knew lots of people thought of him like the ideal bachelor. It was all ridiculous, he couldn't care less what some journalists thought of him, what mattered was keeping his company in control and dominating the business. And for that, he had to look the part.

"Yes?"

"Brother, can I come in?"

"You don't have to ask, Mokuba. What's wrong?" He frowned at the door.

His little brother appeared, already dressed and probably on his way to get breakfast. It wasn't _too_ early, when Seto fell asleep he usually passed out for all the hours he had deprived himself of rest. Truth be told, he didn't have time to sleep and when it came to him the schedule was completely off.

"Everyone's getting a bit anxious. You haven't explained why you want them here yet"

"I don't want them here" He simply said, moving towards his closet and looking through it for the perfect cufflinks. True, he had to look the part, but was there a reason he was trying to look his best this morning? He pushed the thoughts away.

"But you want Yuugi here"

Seto paused for a brief moment, and when he turned again he had a couple sliver dragon cufflinks on his hands. "Mokuba, what's the problem exactly?"

"I don't know what to say to them"

He smiled and placed a hand on his brother's shoulder "I'll take care of it, come on"

Without another word, they walked from the top floor to the main kitchen. Seto could hear voices and bickering while descending the stairs. He hated it. He knew Yuugi would be followed by all of his friends _everywhere_ , especially considering how close they all were to getting the Pharaoh his memories. But do they have to be so loud?

Thankfully he had 'invited' them to a house he never used. He couldn't imagine his real home invaded like this.

Mokuba rushed into the kitchen, but he kept a slow pace trying to avoid the moment. Social interaction just for 'fun' was pointless.

"I'm telling you this house is haunted!" Jonouchi said, raising from his seat and giving Honda a frown.

"I'm sure you are overreacting because this is Kaiba's place"

Everyone chuckled, and Kaiba wanted to roll his eyes, he didn't. Instead, he pushed the door open, walking into the kitchen with his head held high.

"Morning, Kaiba!"

Seto looked at Yuugi, it had to be him and not the.. Other presence, he had been just too cheerful. He gave a polite nod in return. "I know you are wondering why you are here. I wonder the same, considering how my invitation didn't include any of you"

"Yeah, well, we would never let Yuugi go to a strange location to meet with you, Kaiba!"

Seto crossed his arms, hating that Mokuba had to be present during all these uncomfortable fights. But it couldn't be avoided. Some things had to happen.

"I'll put all of my resources at your disposition" He said, but focused his attention on Yuugi, who seemed surprised. "I know you'll all be traveling to Egypt. I suppose you can use the financial aid"

There was a moment of stunned silence, he didn't want their thanks or their surprise. He wanted nothing of them, because he didn't need anyone. Yuugi could focus all of his energy in his silly little friends, but he didn't have time for that.

Sometimes, more times than he allowed himself to admit, it annoyed him how Yuugi wasted his time with people less talented than him. There was so much potential there, wasted.

"And in return?" Honda asked, showing more intelligence than he gave him credit for. Interesting.

"Yuugi?"

Yuugi got up and nodded "The Pharaoh and Kaiba already talked about it. It's okay. They are... Helping each other"

Kaiba tightened his arms across his chest, wanting to say he didn't need any help from anyone but it was better to keep quiet. If they all bickered again he would get a headache.

Mokuba sat down on the table, starting to eat some breakfast, looking completely relaxed. Almost as if there was no tension in the room. Good.

"Come on, Yuugi. Have you lost your mind? Or did _he_ go crazy?" Jonouchi reached out towards the _sennen_ puzzle, straight for it.

Seto took pride on being a man who calculated his every move, and was logical enough as to not allow emotion to overtake him. Sadly, his brain seemed to shut down for a brief moment and before he knew it, he was clutching Jonouchi's wrist tightly, stopping him from touching the puzzle.

The silence became more pronounced, thick, tense. And Kaiba knew he should've let go, but it was too late and he wasn't going to admit he got caught acting on impulse.

No one seemed to know what to say or do, and even Mokuba was staring, with his mouth full of food.

"Kaiba" There was a hand on his arm, and he looked towards the owner of it. "Let's go"

Kaiba released Jonouchi, who started to curse and was quickly reprimanded by Anzu. Probably because Mokuba was present, Seto was sure she hated him just as much.

The presence next to him wasn't the one of Yuugi, he was sure of it. But how? How could it be possible? Kaiba wasn't stupid, he knew people could have Dissociative Identity Disorder, but somehow it didn't seem to fit.

They walked out of the kitchen, and Kaiba decided to walk outside. He didn't really like the sun, or being _'outside'_ enjoying _'nature'_ but he had no clue where else to go after that outburst and that morning's dream.

"Are you willing to continue yesterday's talk?"

"Are we alone?"

"No, but we can be"

Kaiba growled, he hated asking for things. He nodded regardless and waited for the Pharaoh to tell him they were alone. It was strange, all of this, and if Mokuba were present he would never speak like this. He had to be a father to him, he couldn't go around believing in fairytales and dead pharaohs.

_Dead_.

"I hope my deal is enough for you"

"It is. It's not necessary, we can find a way to Egypt but... I appreciate it, Kaiba"

Seto nodded absent-mindedly, walking towards the shade. They had a couple tables underneath some trees, and he was thankful for it. The heath was getting a bit unbearable underneath the sun. America's weather wasn't his favorite, not during summer.

The Pharaoh sat next to him, staring towards the ruffling of the leaves. He seemed relaxed, and he wanted to know why, what he was thinking and feeling and desiring...

"Jonouchi wasn't going to harm me"

Fuck.

"Hm"

Yami, as he liked to be called -Seto thought it didn't fit him, but he said nothing- stared at him with his big eyes.

"You don't want to talk about it, do you?"

"No"

"Very well, Kaiba. What do you want to talk about? Because you offered money and resources in exchange for what? My _company_?"

"Don't compare yourself to an escort, have some dignity"

Yami growled, frowning. It was nice to get a rise out of him. "Then what am I to you?"

"A Pharaoh, apparently" He mocked.

"Oh, really? I thought you didn't believe in it, and now I'm your Pharaoh"

Kaiba opened his mouth but nothing came out, not immediately at least. This would be harder than he expected it to be.

"You say you are a pharaoh, fine, that's what I'll call you"

The Pharaoh stared at him without frowning, he almost seemed amused. Kaiba didn't know how to feel about it, he wanted to be pissed, but he wasn't. Anger was good, it was a comforting feeling, but he couldn't reach for it.

"You think your dreams will end when... What? I remember as well?"

"Hypothetically speaking... Perhaps they will stop if I help you with yours"

"I would lie if I said I'm not intrigued by your dreams, they are all I have of my past. You've seen me in your dreams, yes?"

Kaiba nodded "You look different"

"Different how?"

Kaiba had a lot of adjectives in his mind: taller, older, wilder, less experienced, alive,  gold dripping everywhere, darker skin, almost the same ridiculous hair... It had been a breathtaking sight, the first morning he had woken up from one of those dreams. It was nothing like the Yuugi he knew, even if he looked incredibly alike.

"You are taller, older than Yuugi, you are dressed like a Pharaoh... Your hair is the same but your skin's much darker" Kaiba tried to sound completely neutral while describing him. He was extremely good at concealing any time of emotion, but he had failed that morning in the kitchen. No more mistakes, no more.

"Of course" The pharaoh nodded, smiling softly "anything else?"

Ugh. "You look like someone who has the weight of the world on his shoulders"

"Do we get along?"

"Not always, not exactly... No. But then... Yes?" Kaiba looked back towards the house, but no one came after them. At least they were alone, or as alone as someone could be with a man that had someone else inside his mind.

"You are a good father to Mokuba"

That felt like a stab through his chest, for some reason. He didn't want to think or dwell on it too much. He looked at him with a deep frown on his face. "I don't need, nor want your approval. You speak of things that you don't understand" This time it was easy to reach for his anger.

"Hm, I wasn't giving my approval, just stating a fact. But you are right, I don't think I had any children. Perhaps... Siblings?"

"I don't know" He could've gotten up and left, but he didn't. He stayed right there, sitting next to him. "How do you think this ends?"

Yami closed his eyes, a small smile on his face "Kaiba, I don't know what fate has in store for me, but as far as I know... I'm just a soul. I'm dead"

Set didn't know what he expected, but in all of the insanity that made sense. If he truly was a pharaoh that lived 3000 years ago, he was already gone and buried somewhere in Egypt. Or at least his body was. What was left now was the essence trapped inside a pyramid puzzle. He looked at the sennen item.

"You can touch it" Yami leaned slightly towards him, with the puzzle in between his hands, but without taking it off his neck. Kaiba wondered what would happen, would his soul leave Yuugi's body if the puzzle was away?

It was just a pyramid made of gold. Just an object. Kaiba's fingers reached for it, and he placed two fingers over the eye, looking up at Yami's face. He didn't know if there would be a reaction, but he had a smirk on his face. It was an expression that haunted his dreams and his mind more than he liked.

"You are trapped in this" It was almost a question, one that he knew the answer to. Or at least the one Yami would give him.

"When someone holds the sennen puzzle, it feels like... someone's knocking at the door of my soul"

Poetic. Ugh. Seto rolled his eyes. "You sound ridiculous"

The pharaoh chuckled, but didn't pull the puzzle away from his fingers, still half leaning over the table towards him. They were close, more than he had been with anyone in ages and even though there was a considerable height difference, Seto could stare right into his eyes.

"I wanted to know, about Blue Eyes..."

Kaiba moved his hand away from the _sennen_ puzzle, and looked somewhere else. "Beat me in a duel and I might tell you something else"

He chuckled "My pleasure"

**

**_Aibou_ **

_Are you still thinking about Kaiba?_

Yami didn't like feeling confused. And above all, he didn't like interrupting Yuugi's life. True, the situation they were in had more to do with him than Yuugi but it didn't mean he had a right to start talking while he was with his friends having fun.

He couldn't voice this concerns to his aibou, who was too kind to say anything to him. Yuugi's friends were his friends, or at least that's what he tried to believe. Yami knew he could count on them, but did they see _him_ or just Yuugi? He would always carry them in his heart, wherever his path may lead.

**_Yes. He's holding back, but those memories are also my own._ **

_You can't put too much pressure on him, you know how he is. I'm happy he's starting to accept all of this._

**_Hmpfh._ **

Yuugi frowned, walking away from his friends to have a moment alone with him. The others didn't seem to mind, after everything that had happened it wasn't surprising that they would want a moment or two for them alone.

_Is he not believing?_

**_He's hard to read. He thinks he's just having dreams. Kaiba won't tell me everything, he challenged me to a duel for information. I won, and-_ **

_Kaiba always keeps his word, did he tell you more?_

Yami nodded, aware that his aibou could see him. No one else could when he wasn't 'in charge' of the body. It was strange, existing but away from anyone's gaze. Did he really exist if no one acknowledged him? He knew the answer was yes, but did he exist for the others? Did Kaiba think of him, or did he think of Yuugi? He didn't press further into that line of thought, strange feelings starting to pour from his chest.

  ** _He told me about Blue Eyes, about a girl. He tried to sound as if he didn't care, but I know he cares. I just want-_**

_To help him? Kaiba is... It's hard to help him. He would take offence if you coddled him._

He groaned, well aware that Kaiba was a proud man, almost as much as he was. Despite that, could they not... come to an understanding? This situation wasn't helping either of them. Kaiba was dealing with getting his past life's memories back, as unsettling as that was, and he was a lost pharaoh without the most basic understanding of his life. They needed each other. Now more than ever.

Yami bit down on his lip, looking away, conflicted.

_Everyone's going to the city, they are kind of tired of being here and... well, we are in America. How about you use that time with him?_

**_But, aibou, don't you want to go as well?_ **

_It's alright. I'll just go another time._

Yuugi would be able to go back there, sometime later in his life and do everything he couldn't right now. The pharaoh wouldn't be so lucky and even if he were... it would always be as a parasite inside someone else's mind.

_Stop it. You are not a burden, I want you to have this._

**_Thank you for giving me time and... everything else._ **

Yuugi smiled, making him remember what he fought for. His friends, his aibou. Even Kaiba.

**

Yami spent the rest of the afternoon outside enjoying the sun, he loved it on his skin but he tried not to hurt Yuugi's skin too much. He wondered if his liking of summer and heat had anything to do with his past, if anything in his soul still remembered those days. Was he the same man he had been 3000 years ago? Would his past self be proud of who he became? Yami wanted to believe the answer to those questions was yes, but there was no way to tell.

The only one that knew anything about those times and could share it with him, was Kaiba. A man that didn't like talking about his feelings, or show them. Someone who didn't believe in magic, or souls, or reincarnation. There were fundamental differences between the two of them, things that should make them clash intensely, things that ordinary people couldn't put behind. But they weren't ordinary. And he felt a pull towards Kaiba, he had always felt it. Ever since they met. A pull he was afraid to question, to explore. Where would it lead? What good would it do?

He hadn't seen the Kaibas at all after his friends left to check out the city, and he had felt quite lonely. No, not lonely. He yearned for a certain company from a certain someone.

How to find him? That house was gigantic, almost as big as Kaiba's ego -Yami tried not to smirk at his own thoughts- and he had no clue if Kaiba had left for some business call.

It took him an hour to check all the rooms on the first floor, only to find Seto standing inside his office, next to his desk. Why hadn't he searched there in the first place? Was he trying to delay the moment? No. He wasn't a coward.

"Kaiba" Yami opened the door a bit wider, and realized the man was holding some papers in one of his hands "Am I interrupting?"

Seto looked up at him and turned, making him a gesture for him to get in and close the door. He wanted to ask if he was working, but he didn't have to.

"Mokuba's homework" The young CEO said, leaving the papers on his desk and sitting down. "You can sit"

"I don't need your permission" It wasn't necessary to say that either, but he did, sitting across from Kaiba. There was a small smirk on his porcelain skin, and Yami breathed in. "Is he homeschooled?"

"What? No. I don't have time for that. I could, I'm smart enough but..." Kaiba shook his head softly "He goes to school, but has tutors to make up for any lost lessons if the need arises"

"Hm" He smiled, softer than he wanted "He's smart"

"Are you here to talk about my brother?"

"No" Yami paused for a moment "Which one of us do you think I-...?"

"You are the pharaoh" He said as if it was painfully obvious "Why?"

His heart skipped a beat, but he simply nodded. "It's not like people can tell us apart, you know"

"Most people are stupid" Kaiba tilted his head to the side, exposing some of his neck to him "Do you know how to play chess?"

Yami smiled "Yes"

There was a moment of silence, before they both turned to the chess set in the office.  


	4. City lights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

_"Do you know how to play chess?"_

_Yami smiled "Yes"_

_There was a moment of silence, before they both turned to the chess set in the office._

 

Their feet had been touching underneath the table during all of the games, there was no way one of them hadn't realized. At first Yami thought it was simply because Seto was too tall and long so he didn't have where to place his legs, but after a while it felt more like a tentative touch.

Yami frowned at the chess set, trying to understand how he had lost, again, for the seventh time in a row. He closed his eyes for a moment, smiling tenderly "You're good at chess"

"I'm great at most games" Kaiba shrugged, but there was a strange giddiness to his smile. He was relaxed, yes, but the wins had left him exhilarated.

The sun had gone down, and Yami hadn't realized how late it was, or how long they had been playing. It had been one of the most enjoyable evenings he could remember.

"That's to be seen" He smirked, knowing Kaiba would love to prove himself and perhaps that would give them more excuses to spend time together. He wanted his company, so much so he was scared to think about it.

"I have nothing to prove, but I'll enjoy crushing you" There was no malice to his words, so Yami chuckled, moving one of his legs only to feel Kaiba's foot right behind his ankle. It shouldn't feel good, such a silly little touch, but it did.

"You can try, Kaiba" He knew his friends would come back any second now, and even if they didn't, he had stolen too much time from Yuugi already. "I know you don't like to talk about these things, but I can see you are distraught"

There wasn't an immediate answer like he had expected, Kaiba simply stared at him with his cold blue eyes. The walls he had placed were so big Yami wondered if he would ever be able to find the door in them.

"There are more things in my mind than those little dreams"

"Those little dreams have you _on edge_ , Kaiba"

Seto growled, crossing his arms and untangling his foot from Yami's leg. "You don't know me on edge"

"Oh, I think I do" He stood up, and Kaiba did the same. There was no real reason to fight, physically, but they were both staring at the other's eye with fisted hands.

"No, you don't. But do you want to?" Kaiba gave a step forward, and the Pharaoh didn't back down, forcing both of them even closer.

"You are not scary, Kaiba. Not to me"

The brunette swallowed, without moving away, their bodies so close they could press them together if they leaned into the other.

Neither dared cross the invisible line... Until one of them did. Kaiba grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him closer and forcing Yami to stand on the tip of his toes. Their faces were inches apart, and Yami had never felt more confused.

"You were _dead_ " And then Kaiba let go, almost pushing him a few inches away from his body.

"How do you mean?"

There wasn't a moment of silence, Kaiba was pacing around the room, hands uneasy at his sides.

"You were dead! _You_ _lef_ -" The pharaoh could see the exact moment when he controlled himself, pulling back all that raw emotion to only leave the shadow of a grimace.

Yami knew what he had almost said _: You left me_. He didn't say it out loud, because that would humiliate the CEO, he knew him well enough to know that. His mind was void of memories, true, but he sympathized with him. Death was the one thing that couldn't be fixed, at least not to his knowledge. You can delay it, trick it perhaps, but you can never escape from it.

The air was now thick, and he decided that for an hour or two - or just for a few minutes- he wouldn't care about anything else in the world. He closed the space between them, pressing himself to Kaiba's body, hugging him. The man tensed, and didn't move at all, Yami didn't expect him to. If he thought very hard about it, he had only ever seen him hug Mokuba, no one else. He half expected to be punched.

Of course, life loved to surprise him.

Slowly, very slowly, he felt Kaiba's arms around him. It was hesitant at first, soft, and he imagined that was all he was going to get but, once again, he was wrong. He had never liked being wrong so much like in that moment.

The brunette tightened the embrace so much Yami had to press his cheek to his chest and try to reign in his heartbeat.

There wasn't a single word spoken.

**

"I'm glad you had fun in the city" Yuugi said with a smile, sitting next to one of his best friends. The group had returned pretty late, and in high spirits. Jonouchi and Honda had gone straight to bed, but Anzu had stayed behind to talk to him. He appreciated it immensely.

Yuugi had felt disoriented and confused several times after completing the sennen puzzle, but this time it was even weirder. He could feel the pharaoh's presence even more than usual, and he knew his other self was restless. There was something on his mind and Yuugi didn't know what it was. At first, he thought being so close to getting his memories back had him worried or scared -anyone would be- but now he wasn't so sure.

True, the pharaoh had been stressed and worried about his memories, but there was a weird calming feeling coming from him every time they talked about it. Once they got to Kaiba's? That changed. Almost instantly, almost as if the pharaoh had something else on his mind. Something new.

"It was beautiful, Yuugi... You should've come with us!"

"I wanted to" He admitted, not quite sure if his other self was listening. He hoped not, he didn't want him feeling bad about it "but the pharaoh had things to talk to Kaiba about"

Anzu frowned slightly, her lips puckering as well. Yuugi tried not to blush.

"Do you know what they talked about?"

Yuugi shook his head "No. I think it was about their memories, but he won't tell me"

She seemed as surprised as anyone who knew their bond would be. Yuugi and the pharaoh were used to sharing absolutely everything -same body, 'same' mind, same friends, same _enemies_ \- and now it seemed there was something out of reach for one of them. Or both of them, in some way.

"And it's not like you can ask Kaiba what they talked about" Anzu joked, giving him a worried look. She was always there for her friends, and it was something Yuugi had always admired "Can you?"

"No, he's locked in his office. I could go and ask but... the pharaoh told me not to"

"Strange..."

Yuugi tried not to worry, he trusted both of them -Yami _and_ Kaiba- but he was getting extremely curious. He had a hunch as to what it could be, considering how he shared a mind with one of the men involved but he didn't want to jump to conclusions.

"It's alright... he has a right to his privacy" Yuugi smiled and got up "I should go to bed, I'm tired"

"Goodnight, Yuugi" She smiled her comforting smile, and watched him go.

**

Kaiba kept his blue eyes fixed on the ceiling above him. It was quite late -2 am to be exact- and he wanted to go back to work. He had wanted to get back to work since the moment he left his office to go to bed. Normally, he wouldn't allow anything or anyone to interrupt his work but... Mokuba had been quite distressed.

Seto knew he had to be a big brother -a _father_ \- to him, he had accepted it the moment they were left alone and he had never regretted it. So he had left the office to have dinner in his bedroom with his little brother. He knew Mokuba wanted to spend more time with him having fun, but Seto had to be a responsible adult, he couldn't just go around playing games and nothing else.

Mokuba stirred in his sleep, pulling most of the covers with him.

They had had a nice dinner and talked and played some games on Mokuba's phone until the smaller brother started to fall asleep. Usually, Seto would tell him to go back to his own room... but how could he when he had noticed him so upset? He had tried to find out what had happened, but Mokuba had a way of avoiding the topics he didn't want to talk about.

Spending some time with his brother had been a good distraction from all the things that were nagging at him. Yes, work was important, but work was easy. Creating new things was easy and stimulating. Thinking over and over how to avoid _strange_ and _ridiculous_ dreams was not. It was stressful and draining. Kaiba didn't want any of it.

And to make it all worse... he had allowed the pharaoh to hug him. To _touch_ him. To get _close._ Ugh.

Seto sat up, running a hand through his face before getting up from the bed. There was no point in trying to fall asleep, and Mokuba wasn't a little kid, he could understand that his brother had things to do.

And sometimes those things were obsessing over someone and some _things_ he had been obsessing over for years.

Kaiba wasn't an emotional man but he had never felt what he was feeling right then. It was as if... he could only compare it to the power of his Blue Eyes. As if a dragon had been asleep inside his chest for so long and now something was making it wake up. Seto didn't want it to wake up.

If life had taught him anything, it was how feelings can get in the way of what you want. And, of course, how people you think you can trust can betray you. It was much simpler when the only one deserving of his trust was his little brother.

A powerful man like himself with more than one weakness? In which universe did that end well?

Of course, Kaiba was well aware that the pharaoh wasn't vulnerable or weak -he had experienced his... darkness firsthand- but it didn't make him feel any better.

His office wasn't far from his bedroom, a decision that was more a necessity than a whim. The outside hallway was completely dark, which wasn't odd considering how everyone was fast asleep but him. Seto couldn't understand it, how could people waste so much creative time sleeping. Doing _nothing._

Kaiba stopped outside of his office, frowning at the light coming from beneath the door. Was someone meddling with his things? It wouldn't be the first time he had a run in with an intruder, but it would be the first time in _this_ house. He swallowed, placing his hand over the handle. He was in his night clothes, without a weapon... Perhaps he had left the lights on?

"Yuugi?" He frowned, seeing the boy inside his office. The office was exactly as they had left it hours before. The chess set was still out, and the pieces showed a game not finished. Yuugi's friends had arrived sooner than expected, or perhaps they had spent too much time playing together and lost track of time. Seto didn't want to think about it too much.

"Yuugi's asleep" The voice said, the deeper, more mature one. Kaiba closed the door behind himself, frowning. "We didn't finish our game"

"I-" He doubted only for a moment, his heart beating faster. "It's pointless, I would've won anyway"

The pharaoh looked up and smiled, which wasn't unusual but it always made him feel the same... strange sensation in the pit of his stomach. At first he had thought it was hatred -considering how he usually saw him smile during his duels or to his _other_ friends- which was completely normal, but now he worried it was... something else.

"I don't know, Kaiba, I think I figured you out"

He was taunting him, trying to get him to accept. Why? Just to play a game?

"I have to work, Yami, so if you'll excuse me..."

"You didn't invite me here just to ignore me"

Kaiba had to agree, but he also had a company resting on his shoulders... and a restless mind.

"No, I did not" He sat across from the pharaoh, and crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm starting to think this was a mistake"

The pharaoh didn't seem worried about it, smiling very softly. "We needed to talk to each other, I don't see how that's a mistake. I would say we still have things to say"

Seto would say the contrary, actually, Seto would've liked to get up and run away from that situation entirely, but he stayed. He wasn't a coward. He wouldn't run away from _him._

"I told you everything I know and you gave me nothing, so I would say it proves the dreams are bullshit. Not only that, but that our talks are... unnecessary. I promised to help you go whenever it is you need to go to gain your memories back... but don't expect me to be friendly until then"

The pharaoh kept a serious expression on his face, not wanting to give up.

"I can leave, if you want me to. Right now." Kaiba didn't speak, gritting his teeth. "Or I can stay... and we can play a game and talk some more"

Kaiba didn't like losing and he didn't like compromising, so he got up. "No, we are not staying and playing some stupid game" He gave him a stern look "Let's go, we are going to the city"

The pharaoh seemed surprised at that, but didn't waste any time. He got up, and followed him "The city? It's almost three in the morning?"

Kaiba rolled his eyes "Scared?"

"No? You are in your night clothes"

He tried not to chuckle while walking towards one of his cars "I have a change of clothes in the garage"

Seto could see the pharaoh's face, he probably wondered _why_. Being a public person like he was, famous even, entailed a lot of sneaking around.

He opened the car's doors for the pharaoh with the press of a button, to let him get in while he changed clothes in a small room inside his garage. Even though it was only for a few days -or that was the plan- he hated that house. It was too big, too cold, too opulent. He didn't care for anything like that, but owning a property that big made him and his company look good. And it was a secluded place, if he ever needed one.

"I don't know how to drive" The pharaoh said, once he was driving them towards the city. Kaiba liked to drive fast, but he wasn't stupid and he wouldn't put his own life in danger. Not while having Mokuba under his care.

"Hm. Can't imagine cars in ancient Egypt" His tone was mocking, but he hadn't meant to be _cruel._ Luckily, the other boy only chuckled.

"No, I can't either" He knew the pharaoh was staring, but he didn't took his eyes from the road. "There are things I know, from the past. I don't know anything about myself or the people I knew... but I know things about... I don't know... the games that used to be played, or the language or-"

Kaiba tightened his hands on the steering wheel, trying not to show anything on his face. _Everything_ he had seen could be explained with a little bit of logic, he was _sure_ of it. True, he had accepted that the Pharaoh and Yuugi were two different people but he could easily do some research about Dissociative Identity Disorder and figure it all out. It would all make sense. Right? Even his own... strange dreams could be explained. He had been exposed for too long to Yuugi's crazy thoughts, so it was only a matter of time until he started to... To what? Go crazy? He gritted his teeth. There was no way he was going insane, his mind was too sharp for that. Right?

"You don't have to believe everything I tell you, Kaiba"

"I never said I believed any of it, _Pharaoh_ "

There was a small _'hm'_ sound, but nothing more. The house was half an hour away -without traffic- from the city, but by the time they made it there, it was still pitch dark. The dawn would come in two hours or so, and Kaiba wasn't planning on spending that much time there anyway.

They got out of the car and Kaiba was about to tell him where to go, when he was struck by the pharaoh's expression. The boy was staring at everything so intently he had to keep quiet to let him enjoy it. There was something in his eyes, some strange childish amazement Kaiba wished he had.

He could have said something hurtful, like: _if you're done staring at the pretty lights we have somewhere to be,_ or _What? your people didn't have **buildings?**_  but he couldn't. Instead, he walked around his own car to stand next to him.

"Cities are nice after dark"

Yami blinked, and turned to see him almost as if he was seeing him for the first time that night "They are. Is this what you do? Work all day and wander around at night?"

Kaiba chuckled "What? Like a vampire? _No_." He started walking, followed by the short boy "But I usually leave the office quite late, yes"

"I can understand that"

"You've never worked in your life"

There was a brief pause "But I have, haven't I? I was your ph-"

" _Tsk_ "

The pharaoh chuckled "Alright, alright. Where are we going?"

Kaiba simply pointed to a fast food restaurant. Truth be told, he was starving. It was no surprise to anyone that knew him he didn't eat well. It's not that he didn't like eating or that he had a problem, it was just that he didn't have the time for that. He was always working, or creating something, or looking after Mokuba. Sleeping and eating were two activities he indulged in, but took way too much time and effort.

"Hope you are hungry"

"I didn't have any diner" Yami shrugged and Seto wondered if he experienced hunger or if he got tired. _IF_ what he said was true, then he was a spirit living inside the body of a teenage boy. So, did he feel anything? Anything real?

The clearly overworked employee at the restaurant didn't look at them twice, taking their order and quickly dispatching them. There wasn't a line and the place was practically deserted. Good. Once their food was in two paper bags, Kaiba grabbed them and walked outside immediately. He could have stayed inside, but those places had too much light and were too artificial for his liking. There was no effort. Nothing. He always tried to make the restaurants inside his amusement parks... better.

"You eat fast food" The pharaoh sat next to him, pulling a French fry from his bag and eating it, there was a small smirk on his face and Kaiba tried not to look at his lips for too long. "A bit surprising, but not too much if I think about it"

He wanted to groan, what did it matter what he ate? True, people thought he was a spoiled brat who only ate sushi and drank expensive wine. And yes, Kaiba knew how to appreciate the finer things in life, but love them? enjoy them? _Want_ them? He _liked_ a nice suit, and a nice _bed_. Everything else was decoration.

Instead of saying anything, Kaiba rolled his eyes at him and started eating. Some of his best memories were of him and Mokuba eating fast food, sitting on the floor, talking about the future -and plotting a little bit as well.     

The street lights were _just_ enough to let them see each other and the food they were eating. He liked that. It made it all feel... slow, and private. Two things he didn't usually have in his everyday life.

"How much have you told your friends about this?"

"Nothing"

Kaiba stared at him, and knew he was being honest. "You had questions that I didn't answer"

"You're willing to answer them now?"

He sighed and looked down at his burger for a moment "Yes"

"The girl, tell me about her"

The pharaoh didn't need to clarify which girl he meant. "That's not a question"

"Fair enough. Do you know her name?"

Kaiba took one of the fries and stared at it for a few seconds. If he truly believed everything was a weird _fever dream_ then why was it so hard to speak her name aloud?

He swallowed. "Kisara"

"You loved her"

"That's not a question" Kaiba tried not to feel angry, but somehow... "I... suppose. I don't-" He groaned "This is like telling someone else's story. And this just proves everything is _not real_ "

"How come?" The pharaoh barely tilted his head.

"I've never even met someone named like her. Or that looks like her. And apparently everyone in your _little_ past is here, no?" Kaiba shrugged, trying not to think about... the one _thing_ that reminded him of that sickly girl "And even if she existed today, I've never felt any attraction towards-"

The silence that followed made Seto uncomfortable, even if he told himself there was no reason to feel that way. "Women?"

_Fuck._

"Yes" Kaiba stared at him, but the pharaoh didn't seem bothered by it. Fine, whatever. It's not like he cared what people thought of him.

"Loving someone doesn't mean that it always has to be romantic. It's more than that. And you told me she was... related to your Blue Eyes. I've never seen a stronger connection to a card, Kaiba"

Ugh. Why did he have to tell him that?

"She's just a dream, an invention. Something I created"

"You don't believe that" No. He didn't. But he wouldn't be caught dead admitting it. Not yet. "I'm not going to fight with you to try and make you see all of this is real... I'm just going to say thank you for sharing that"

Kaiba rolled his eyes again, taking a sip from his soda and trying to find his appetite again. The girl had been haunting him ever since he had those dreams, and he hadn't been able to look at his blue eyes the same way. But now he felt a bit... better.

"You honestly think someone's soul, from thousands of years ago, can be attached to a card?"

Yami smiled "We've seen weirder things. Yes, of course I believe that. I believe in souls and the power they have" Ugh. "And I'd say she has taken good care of you, and you of her"

"Stop talking about my Blue Eyes like that" He frowned, it was one thing starting to accept that perhaps some of that was real, and another to start talking about _cards_ as if they were _alive._ His Blue Eyes was powerful and reliable, and important but it wasn't a person.

The Pharaoh smirked, and nodded respectfully.

"That's it? All of your questions were about the supposed love life I had 3000 years ago?"  

"No" A pause "I have many questions, but we are also having a conversation" His gaze was intense "You don't like women?"

Kaiba raised an eyebrow "I'm aware of their beauty but..." He shook his head "No, I don't"

Yami nodded once, slightly thoughtful and then smiled "Thanks to my aibou I understand the social implications of being attracted to your same gender in this time"

He frowned "Wait, is he...?"

"Oh? No, no. I don't think so. What I mean is that we share some basic knowledge of the world. I understand part or most of what he understands... And he used to be bullied" Kaiba knew that about Yuugi, but he hadn't thought about it much lately. It all seemed so far away "They called him a girl, as if that were insulting somehow. I guess that... through his experience and pain I understood certain social... norms?"

Ah. Kaiba nodded, trying to pretend like he wasn't nervous. No one had ever gotten this close to him. He hadn't even told his brother, not that Mokuba would care anyway.

"It wasn't like this in your _ancient land_?"

The Pharaoh clearly didn't like his tone, but shrugged "I'm not an expert. Besides, it doesn't really matter. You were in love with a girl back then"

"You sound jealous"

A pause. Way too long. Way too short. "I do, don't I?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry it took this long! I was on vacation for around 20 days and I literally had no internet! I'll try to update much, much faster now that I'm back home >)   
> Hope you liked it and if you can, please leave a comment, they always keep me going!


	5. Wine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

_"You sound jealous"_

_A pause. Way too long. Way too short. "I do, don't I?"_

The pause was longer than what he would have liked, but he kept his expression as stone cold as possible. The pharaoh seemed as relaxed as ever, so why would he be tense or bothered by his... _implication_? Kaiba knew he was probably teasing him, and there were no real emotions behind his words. No point getting worked up about it.

His appetite was gone, though, so he simply pushed his bag of food away from himself. There was a worried ' _hm_ ' from the other man, and he tried not to think about it.

"With your mind..."  Yami said, speaking softly "you don't know what it's like to have a maze in your head" 

Kaiba wasn't sure if he was right, he knew what darkness was, and he could be lost inside his own head as well. Everyone was, a little bit.

"You are _brilliant_ " Kaiba had never needed anyone's approval but his own. True, perhaps he liked to show off to Yuugi -and _him_ \- but he had gone on his own for too long to expect anything from anyone. He was the one in charge of his future, of his destiny, no weird dreams or stupid stories would change that. "I don't expect you to understand what it's like to not know... your name, even"

Kaiba didn't need anything from anyone, yes, but hearing _'you are brilliant'_ made his heart stop for a split second.

" _Fine_ " He sighed, defeated "You used to wear a lot of gold"

"Where?"

Ugh.

"On your arms, and face and... everywhere, really. It makes sense, if you are a Pharaoh" There was a look on his face, as if he was trying his best to remember or to picture himself. It made Seto move a bit closer, wanting to ease him but not knowing how. The only thing that came to mind was to keep talking, about his dreams, about everything he _'knew'_. Thankfully there was no one around to see him indulge in such nonsense "You don't ever seem relaxed or happy, but I have no idea why. And there are dreams where we fight, but I don't know why either. And I can't recall your name, ever"

His name. That was something that led him to believe it was all his imagination. The only reason why Kaiba couldn't know his name was because the idea hadn't been implanted in his subconscious mind. Everything could be explained by logic. He dreamt of Egypt due to everything that had happened, and because he listened to Yuugi and his troupe spew nonsense for way too long. And he didn't know his name because there was nothing there to know, because...

Kaiba tried not to feel torn. The pharaoh existed, didn't he? He _had_ to exist, he was _speaking_ to him. But at the same time... there was no way he could be a _real pharaoh_. Did it matter? Did it _truly_ matter? Pharaoh or no pharaoh, the man he had in front was real. He _had_ to be.

"Thank you, Kaiba"  He looked at him, with a smile and those big eyes.

"Your eyeliner was much more dramatic" That got him a laugh, and Kaiba had to try very hard not to smile.

"We should get back, the sun is rising"

There was no point in staying there and Kaiba definitely didn't want to be in the city when the sun came out and people started to rush in to go to work. There wasn't anything _inherently_ wrong with people, but he had little to no patience.

They didn't speak on the way back, but it wasn't an uncomfortable silence. In fact, Kaiba hadn't felt so relaxed with someone other than Mokuba in a long time, if ever. There was a strange feel to having the pharaoh around, almost as if they both were the same. Somehow.

By the time they arrived at the mansion, the sun was shining bright in the sky. There was no doubt that Yami -or at least his body- needed to rest, so they said goodbye quietly, without touching or even speaking. Kaiba almost wanted to follow.

Unlike the others, he didn't go back to his bed. Mokuba would probably be a bit hurt that he left him sleeping alone -and scared, if he woke up again- all night but... he would make it up to him, eventually. His brother had been distressed and he had no idea why, and no way of finding out unless his brother wanted to share.

Kaiba allowed work to take most of his day away. It kept his mind occupied, and it gave him an outlet for all the creativity he had. True, there were more pressing matters, but those were for later.

Despite his desires of not leaving the office, he agreed to have dinner in the kitchen with his little brother. Apparently, it was way past the normal dining time and everyone was asleep, except Mokuba who had been waiting for him to stop working. It warmed his heart.

So he went to the kitchen table and smiled at the bought food -expensive, clearly taken care of by Isono-. If he had known what was going to happen to him, he would've kept working.

"Brother?" Mokuba stood up, worry written all over his face but he couldn't answer. His head was burning, he felt as if the floor didn't exist. The glass of wine still on his hand. "Seto, what's wrong?"

Kaiba closed his eyes, hearing the glass shatter on the floor. Had he dropped it? He allowed his hands to reach his hair, knowing he was worrying Mokuba but unable to stop himself. It was too much, too fast. It was... exactly like the duel against Ishizu. That same sinking feeling, the images and emotions flashing through his brain. Way too clear, way too loud.

He could almost feel the warm desert breeze on his skin. Almost.

_"You are not failing" Seto said, kneeling in front of the Pharaoh. Not many people had the privilege of being this close to him, or knowing him so well. Seto hadn't expected to be one of those people._

_The young Pharaoh stared at his face, before turning away. Sometimes Seto forgot how young he was, and how much rested on his shoulders._

_"I-" there was silence, and he closed his eyes. Seto reached out, but stopped himself. Touching the Pharaoh wasn't... He wasn't allowed. He wasn't worthy. He took a deep breath "Pharaoh..."_

_"Stop, Seto" He opened his eyes, piercing through him "Stop calling me that. Use my name" One of his hands took Seto's, holding it tightly. "Use it"_

_He wanted to, he was desperate to do so, to say his name... The same way he had done..._ Before _. He pulled back, breathing heavily, unable to remember his name._ No _. He knew the Pharaoh's name. He knew it. He had whispered it when... When... His hands went up to his head, and he heard the Pharaoh raise to his feet. Seto didn't need to look at him to know how worried he must've looked._

_"I'll send for the healer, you need rest. I've asked too much of you"_

_He had. He had asked too much, demanded too much, taken too much, but Seto didn't find the strength to put that into words._

_The Pharaoh turned to leave, to call for a servant, perhaps, making a wave of fear run through Seto's body. He moved, grabbing him by the arm, stopping the younger boy._

_"No... No, I'll go"_

_"You are distressed, you need a healer..."_

_"They can't find me in here"_

_There was a pause. The Pharaoh placed both of his hands on the one Seto had on his arm, and squeezed. "You are my-.. Our High Priest. Nothing will change that. I would never allow any disgrace to fall onto you. There's nothing wrong in wha-"_

_"Your duties... Must come first"_

_"They do" The Pharaoh let go of his hand "... Promise you'll see a healer. You've been too tired"_

_"Yes, my Pharaoh"_

_The boy groaned, looking gorgeous behind all his gold. Seto had been dazzled the first time he saw him. "My name, Seto... Use it."_

_"Y-yes" Why couldn't he recall his name? The name he had whispered to him, while they... While they kissed._

_Wine, it had been the wine, Seto thought, walking away from the Pharaoh. What else? Wine and being dazzled by him... Who wouldn't be? Who wouldn't feel special when that smile was directed at you?_

_They had drank too much wine, and The Pharaoh had invited him to his private gardens, the ones right outside his bedroom. Perhaps he should've thought more of it, but he wanted to spend more time with him. Their duties usually led them away from the other, and Set was so tired of being alone. Of not knowing the man he was serving so dutifully. So he had said yes, and laughed, and the Pharaoh had laughed as well._

_Even though Seto tried, he couldn't remember if anyone had noticed them. With no one to stop them or demand the Pharaoh's attention, they had made their way to his garden, and it was beautiful._

_Seto had never seen so many different flowers together... The perfume was way too strong, and the shades of green... Usually, he wouldn't admit to be so enthralled by something but he had had too much wine and he was laughing, so he did. He told the Pharaoh how beautiful the night was, and how much fun he was having and suddenly he wasn't talking with as much decorum as he should._

_The Pharaoh seemed more than happy, drinking as much - if not more--wine as him._

_They had sat on the floor, because the stone benches were too formal, and he had said something about his eyes... Or had the Pharaoh said something about his eyes?_

_Seto remembered reaching out, touching a strand of hair over his face, leaning in..._

_The kiss had been sweet, and consuming. He forgot about the flowers, or the shades of green or the cold fresh air on his skin. The only thing he was feeling was warmth, and.. And happiness._

_The wine. It had been the_ wine _._

Kaiba kept his eyes on the red liquid, pouring down the drain. He was the one holding the bottle down, making it all go away. Drinking wasn't something he enjoyed, not because he didn't like the taste of alcohol -he did- but he considered it a waste of time. And what was worse: a potential harm to his brain. Besides, he just couldn't understand what was supposed to be fun about drinking. Despite all of this, being the CEO of one of the biggest companies in the world, he had been in way too many diner parties to know he couldn't avoid the substance. It was fine, really. A glass of champagne had its charms when you are bored out of your mind listening to pathetic old white men talking as if they owned the world. And it made him look more 'mature' for certain investors, which was a good thing for the company.

Kaiba pulled the bottle out of the sink once it was empty. He could still smell it, and it didn't help at all. It was one thing having dreams, but it was another to have... visions? It had happened before, dueling Ishizu, and it wasn't a pleasant feeling. He had hoped, deep down, it wouldn't come to this. But it had. Perhaps forcing Yugi -and the Pharaoh- to meet with him in a more relaxed setting hadn't been a good idea.

It had been an hour since that weird vision interrupted his dinner and the one glass of wine he had had that night (only because it was supposed to be drank with the dish he was having), and he kept trying to find a good logical explanation. There was one, of course. The most terrifying one. The most logical explanation to his weird episode was that it was a consequence of lack of sleep, too many occult stories and... Being _fond_ of the Pharaoh. He knew that _fondness_ wasn't exactly the word he should use, but he couldn't think the alternative. It put him in a vulnerable position.

And he had left Mokuba so worried... He hated doing this to his little brother. There was no excuse, and he would have to make it up to him, soon. It took him almost the whole hour to convince him that he was alright and he didn't need to go lay down. Although, he probably needed the sleep.

"Kaiba? Are you alright?"

He groaned, turning around as if he had been caught hiding murder evidence. They both stared at each other, how come he was always there? True, he had been the one to go after Yuugi and instigate both their rivalry and... _'friendship'_. But sometimes, just sometimes, he wanted not to see him and he was still _right there_!

"This is my kitchen"

"Yes" The boy smiled, warmly, innocently. Oh, so it wasn't the Pharaoh. Kaiba wanted to relax but... He couldn't. "But you don't look okay..."

"I'm fine, Yuugi. Do-do you need anything?" He didn't mean to be nice but he was exhausted, and confused and alone.

"I came for a glass of water, actually" He walked towards the counter, looking around for one.

Kaiba groaned and opened the cabinet, the glasses were... a bit too high for the boy. It was endearing and he hated himself for even thinking that.

"Here you go"

"Thank you"  Yuugi smiled, and started pouring water into his glass "Mokuba talked to me..."

Oh no.

"He shouldn't have. I understand he's worried about what happened at dinner but it's nothing. I'm fine"

Yuugi seemed startled by that. "What happened at dinner?"

Oh, great. Was nothing going according to plan?

"Why was my brother talking to you?"

"Because we are all living here?" He smiled "He wanted to know when to prepare the plane to take us all to Egypt. For the Pharaoh"

_For the Pharaoh._

"I can have it ready in the morning"

Yuugi gave him a look that made him want to scream at him. He didn't need to be... fussed over. He was fine, perfectly fine.

"It's alright to feel sad... He feels like that as well"

He didn't answer, because there was nothing to say without exposing himself. Even though he tried to tell himself the pharaoh meant nothing to him, the truth was he had a bond with him. One that went way beyond dueling.

A bond that could... could even be... No. There was no time for that.

"What exactly will happen once you...?"

Yuugi swallowed "Ishizu told me there's a place where all the souls need to go back to"

He understood, of course he did. He hadn't been completely blind to the situation, he knew what had to happen. If anything of what they had said for years was real, then the Pharaoh was dead -long dead- and his soul didn't belong with them anymore. So it would only make sense for him to...

"Kaiba? Do you want to say something?"

"Do you want me to prepare the plane? You can all be gone tomorrow"

Yuugi frowned and shook his head "Not yet. I think he needs a little bit more time. And so do you"

He wanted to say he didn't need time, he was perfectly fine.

He kept quiet.

***

**_Aibou_ **

_Yes?_

**_We should leave as soon as possible. We can't stay here any longer._ **

Yuugi frowned, sitting on his bed and trying to see the pharaoh's face a little bit better. What was going on in his mind? True, they shared it, but they didn't always know what the other one was going through. He had never seen him like this, and when he thought he had it figured out, Yami came with something like this.

_Why? I thought you and Kaiba were getting along._

**_We are._ **

_Then why do you want to leave so soon? Once we leave..._

He couldn't finish the sentence. One of them might not be coming back, but saying so out loud was too much. Sometimes Yuugi thought his heart would break just by thinking of a life without the pharaoh by his side. He was more than a friend, he was a part of himself.

**_He won't be able to move on._ **

Yuugi sighed, hoping he could touch him, hug him, do _something_ other than stare. The Pharaoh wasn't someone who paced when worried, he would usually sit with his arms and legs crossed and a small frown on his face, thinking intently about the problem at hand. If he thought about it, it was the picture of a ruler, someone who had had other people's hopes and fears on his hands.

_You don't know that. And... you might stay with us._

There was silence between them, and neither dare say how little the chances of him 'staying' were.

**_We need to go, it's the right thing to do._ **

_I know-... I know you, but I've never seen you like this about anyone, and I know you are usually right but I think you are making a mistake._

The pharaoh only stared at him, with a questioning look on his face. Yuugi hoped he'd be willing to hear what he had to say.

_I've learnt you have to follow your heart, and friends are the most important things, aren't they? Friends and family. If we leave, you might end up regretting it... And Kaiba is strong._

Yami closed his eyes and sighed, his arms tightening across his chest. If anyone entered the room, they would only see Yuugi staring at the feet of his bed, to the air, but the pharaoh was real to him. He was right there. He looked younger when worried.

_You know, for a 3000 year old Pharaoh you really don't know how to handle these things._

Yami stared at him, wide eyed. Yuugi silently loved how he always got a reaction out of him by being confident. Way back when they met, he had been scared and insecure, and now? He felt good in his own skin, strong, and he owed much of that to the pharaoh. Still, there was the fear of not being enough once he... left. What would he do without him?

**_These... things?_ **

_You used to tease me about Anzu, don't pretend you don't know what I'm saying now._

Yami smirked and gave one of his usual nods. **_I do understand. I didn't want to... I wasn't sure, before._**

Oh, he wasn't? He was about to tease him about it, when there was a knock on the door.

"Come in" Yuugi got up from the bed "Mokuba?"

"We need to talk"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> x)  
> Hope you liked it!


	6. Not Over

 

"Mokuba, is everything okay?"

The young boy was staring at them -well, _him_ but the Pharaoh was there, even if the younger Kaiba couldn't see him- with anger in his eyes. Yugi didn't know why, or if anything had happened in the brief period of time since he had seen Kaiba.

"No, it's not. You need to leave, immediately"

Yugi could see the Pharaoh, still sitting with his arms crossed and a thoughtful expression. Great. This was just... _Great_. Yugi considered himself to be an optimist, but sometimes, just sometimes... He felt a bit at a loss.

"Have we done anything wrong? Did something happen?"

"Yeah, something did happen! My brother is not well, and it's all because of you and your stories!" Mokuba sighed, rubbing a couple fingers on his forehead "I'm not going to let you hurt him anymore"

Yugi didn't need to look at him to know the Pharaoh flinched at that. Way back when, both Kaiba and his other self had hurt each other, endangered the lives of many... But that was a long time ago, and they had changed, improved. Yugi was proud of them.

_Do you wish to handle this?_

**_No_ **

And now he was being cryptic. The Pharaoh was very different than himself, and one of the things that broke Yugi's heart was how sad he always felt. He didn't feel so sad when they were dueling, and there had always been something else when facing Kaiba. Now he knew what it was.

"Mokuba, we care about your brother and we're trying to help... I understand that you are worried, but what happened? Kaiba mentioned something about dinner?"

The young boy seemed conflicted for a moment, frowning, a hand fisted at his side.

"Nothing, he-"

"You can tell me..."

He sighed "He won't tell me what it was, but he was holding his head... He was in _pain_ " The Pharaoh got up from the bed at that, but only stared at the boy. Of course, Mokuba had no clue he was being observed so intensely. "He tried to convince me that everything's fine but I know my brother. And he's not okay. He wakes up in the middle of the night, I can hear him walking in the hallway..."

Yugi wanted to hug the boy, but knew Mokuba was almost as prideful as his older brother, so he didn't.

"I'm sure he's fine, Mokuba... But I'll keep an eye on him"

"No, what you need to do is leave"

"And we will, but not... Not now"

"Why not?"

How to explain all of this to someone so young? It was already difficult to understand for him. Yugi smiled as warmly as he could "We just need a little bit more time... I promise you it won't be more than a week"

He shouldn't have promised. He knew it the moment he did it but... He owed it to his other self. To at least try to get them some more time together.

"No, I have my brother back and I won't risk-"

"You asked me once to save him" Without any warnings, the pharaoh had taken over. He had felt compelled to speak his mind and he and his partner were so connected he didn't need to give him a warning anymore. Besides, Yugi was right there with him. It had taken a while for both of them to he co-conscious, but they had managed and now it was almost second nature. "I won't let anything bad happen to your brother, Mokuba, you have my word"

The young boy frowned, staring at him. "Fine" He sighed "One week... And if he gets worse you leave"

"Deal"

"Has he gone to bed already?"

Mokuba shook his head "He took the car, I didn't want him to go, but he listens to no one"

**

The day received them with a bright sun on the sky, which got everyone on high spirits. That meant that Jonouchi was being as loud as ever, both enjoying the place they were staying and complaining about Kaiba. Yugi couldn't quite blame him, after everything that had happened, but he couldn't hold the same grudge his friend had.

Thankfully, Seto wasn't around to hear him. The last thing they knew was he had taken the car out and left during the night. He hadn't returned yet, and both Mokuba and the Pharaoh were _stressed._

Not that Yugi wasn't worried about it either, he _was_ but he had faith in Kaiba. After everything that had happened, he wouldn't be captured or something like that. The last challenge was waiting for them in Egypt.

"Don't worry, he'll come back soon enough"  Yugi spoke out loud to his other self, walking a bit away from his friends. They were relaxing in the backyard, drinking some lemonade and playing games. It was nice, but he could feel some nostalgia from his other self. They both feared what was to come, for different reasons.

**_Mokuba's worried._ **

Ha, Mokuba wasn't the only one worried. Sometimes Yugi wondered if the Pharaoh realized how clear it was for him to read his emotions. His conflict, his pain. Somehow, Kaiba eased that sorrow.

**_Are you alright, aibou?_ **

_I'm fine_

Was he?

The Pharaoh could read his emotions almost as well as he could. God, he was going to miss him so much.

**_He's here._ **

Yugi couldn't _sense_ Kaiba the same way the pharaoh could. Truth be told, he could feel when he was in danger -when Bakura was around, or way back when Marik had been _cruel_ \- but the pharaoh and Kaiba always seemed to know when the other was around.

Without wanting to make him wait any longer, Yugi hurried inside. The big mansion was more familiar to him now, and he had slowly realized how little the Kaiba brothers liked being there.

"Kaiba!"

The brunette looked his way, dark shadows under his eyes. How long had he been up? Had he driven in that state? Not that anyone would realize how spent he was, with the way he held himself. All straight and proud. It tugged at Yugi's heart somehow.

"What do you need?"

The man stopped just short of the stairs, his white coat on one of his arms.

_Alright, you can take over._

"Seto" His blue eyes sharpened at that, digging into him and not with _kindness,_ not exactly. "your brother's worried"

Something flashed in his face for a moment, before he composed himself "My brother knows I can take care of myself. Do you need anything?"

The pharaoh knew he needed something, but there weren't enough words in this plane of existence to explain it to him. Or there would be, if Kaiba accepted that souls existed, that his dreams were real. Perhaps... perhaps he _could_ try.

"We need to talk, about what you saw..."

"I saw nothing. This is getting ridiculous" He turned completely to him "I only call you Pharaoh because that's what you want to be called, but I don't believe it for a _second_ "

"Oh but you do! You _do_!" The Pharaoh moved, fisting one hand. "You know, deep down, everything's real. You, me, your Blue Eyes"

"Leave _her_ out of this!"

It took only a moment for them to be struck by it. By the use of _her_ instead of _him_ or _it._ Kaiba was clearly stressed, trying to get away from his line of sight. He was about to leave a fight, probably one he knew he couldn't win.

That had been a slip of the tongue, yes, clearly, but the Pharaoh was going to use that. Because no slip of the tongue is ever a lie. Seto _knew_ the truth, and they were running out of time.

"Talk to _me._ Don't be a coward"

"Coward? I'm no coward!" Kaiba stopped short in the middle of the stairs, looking down at him. Their screaming was attracting attention, and the pharaoh could see his friends from the corner of his eyes. This wasn't good, considering how tightly Kaiba would close his emotions if anyone was around to hear.

"You are not? Then Duel me"

The silence was so thick it could've been cut with a knife, or two, of a thousand.

"Fine"

The Pharaoh could see how tired he was, how his shoulders slightly slumped when he accepted, because a true duelist like Kaiba would never decline such a proposition. He felt a bit guilty, taking advantage of the _one thing_ that would force them to speak, even if they would be taunting each other while doing it.

His friends weren't speaking, clearly as stunned as he was of his own actions. There was no real reason to duel Kaiba, other than personal satisfaction. But he didn't want that, he didn't _need_ to defeat him. True, it was one of the most exciting things he did, battling him, but that didn't mean he _needed it._

Or maybe he did.

Kaiba pulled out his deck, and moved to pick a duel disk from a cabinet. He could see how his eyelids were heavy. They had been in situations of life and death, but this wasn't one of those. Was he really going to make him go through this?

"No, without the disk. We'll duel without the holograms"

There was a small groan, but he knew he wouldn't hear much complain from the tall man.

"Fine, then we don't need a stupid audience. All of you, scatter!"

The Pharaoh raised a hand at Jou, who was about to scream at Kaiba. And, alright, maybe it would have been deserved.

**

Kaiba stood on the entrance of the bedroom, frowning at him. Surely, he had expected the duel to be conducted on a table, but the Pharaoh had seen how tired he was and decided a bed was the best choice. Or perhaps he wanted the intimacy.

"We need a flat surface" The Pharaoh explained, placing his deck on top of the covers.

He saw the resignation on the other man's face as he slowly walked to the bed. Kaiba placed his deck to the side as well, shuffling it and then pulling five cards.

The electricity was there, and he almost hated how good it felt.

_Other me, he's too tired. This isn't a fair fight._

**_I-... I know. But I wanted to speak to him and he wouldn't allow it._ **

_I see._

"It's your turn, Pharaoh"

Dueling him was second nature. He summoned a low level monster, placing two face down cards. Kaiba's eyelids were heavy, and his hand was holding the cards as straight as he could.

Kaiba, being how he was, summoned a powerful card with almost two thousand attack points. He always had good cards. It made the Pharaoh want to reach out, pull him by the collar and...

"I place a face down and end my turn"

"No attack? _Scared_ , Kaiba?" The amusement in his voice was obvious and he almost thought he could see Seto's lips curb upwards for a moment.

"Playing to win, Pharaoh. Your move."

"I sacrifice my celtic guardian to summon Black Magician girl" The Pharaoh changed the cards on the 'field' and looked at his hand. He had Sage's Stone, a card that would allow him to summon his most powerful monster. It was a good move, and he was about to go through with it, when he saw a small movement on his peripheral vision. When he looked up, Kaiba had dropped his hand of cards on the mattress and his head was leaning against the headboard. He was asleep, or almost asleep. Probably had closed his eyes just for a moment and...

The Pharaoh was taken aback by how young he looked, how incredibly beautiful.

_We should take care of his cards, other me._

**_No. I can't touch his deck without his permission, or end the duel. He wouldn't forgive me._ **

_Other me, he's asleep. You can continue the duel later, just help him into bed._

The Pharaoh shook his head. _I can't help him, he doesn't need any help, aibou._

Yugi was frustrated, so he took over. The Pharaoh could complain all he wanted later, but he was going to help Kaiba. He was so clearly exhausted he had fallen asleep in the middle of a duel. The one thing that made sparks fly inside his eyes.

He carefully placed all of Kaiba's cards on his deck, and left it on the night table. His own deck right next to it.

Yugi could feel his other self staring at him, but he didn't care. Kaiba was someone they cared about, so he was going to care for him like he would for any of his friends. Trying not to wake him up, he took off his boots, throwing them onto the floor. It would be impossible to pull the covers from under him, so he took a spare blanket, throwing it over his ridiculously long legs.

_Alright, should we leave?_

**_Yes. He'll want to be alone._ **

Yugi wouldn't protest that, he knew he was a man that valued his personal space so he got up to leave. Right when his body turned towards the door, he felt a hand around his wrist. It wasn't holding him too strongly, or tugging at him, or anything like that. It simply was there.

The switch was almost immediate. The pharaoh had taken over again, turning to face Kaiba. The tall man was staring at them with half closed eyes. He wasn't going to ask them to stay. Not with words. His small gesture was more than enough.

There was a moment of hesitation, of doubt. The Pharaoh lay down on the bed again, on his side, looking back at him. Once he did that, his wrist was released. Kaiba had asked him to stay, with a small touch, he could only imagine how hard that had been for him.

Did Kaiba get more open when he was half asleep?

"Seto..."

His blue eyes went down on him, right to the Millenium puzzle.

"You supposedly live in there, correct?" Kaiba moved a hand just enough to reach the puzzle and hold it. Somehow, it didn't look as big inside his hands.

The Pharaoh tried not to show anything on his face, he truly did.

"My soul, yes"

"So if Yugi took it off..."

"I wouldn't be able to switch places with him, yes"

Kaiba nodded, his eyes focused on the Millenium item. One of his fingers lingered over the eye, tracing its shape. The puzzle had been on many hands, it had been touched and destroyed, but it hadn't been touched so softly. The Pharaoh could only recall his partner ever touching it with such tenderness. Such... Affection? Kaiba's touch wasn't obvious, it wasn't a big gesture but it was enough.

"Leave"

"Kaiba... Seto, I-"

"Leave. I need to rest"

And so the touch left the puzzle, replaced only by the same void the Pharaoh had been surrounded for thousands of years.

"No"

"No? This is _my_ room, in _my_ house"

"Hm" He smirked, unmoving. There was a groan, and then the blue eyes closed. He was tired, and angry but not angry enough to fight him. Good. It felt like a small victory, and he knew Kaiba would find the way to get even. Let him try, the Pharaoh thought, the same exhilaration running through his body. "How long have you been without sleep?" He asked, curious and a bit worried. Sometimes he forgot sleeping was something humans did, something he had surely done once upon a time. His partner had to sleep, and he welcomed those hours of self reflection, but he didn't need to sleep. He didn't dream. He didn't rest.

There was a small frown on Kaiba's face, but he didn't open his eyes. Was he thinking? Had he forgotten? If the Pharaoh wanted to know, he would have to wait for Kaiba had fallen asleep. His chest moved slowly and his long, slender fingers were limp over the sheets. Exhaustion.

His hand moved towards his cheek, wondering if he could feel his warmth. He could, of course, through Yugi. But... He wondered if it would feel different somehow. As if he were the one doing the touching, with his own body.

He stopped himself, for several reasons. One of them being how he knew Seto didn't like to be touched.

**_We should leave. It's too early to sleep and he won't wake up in a while._ **

_Are you sure? He looks like he could use a friend._

**_I'm sure._ **

_Fine, I'll take over and go back down._

**_Thank you..._**  
  
**

_They hadn't seen each other in a while. In fact, they hadn't crossed paths since that night in the garden. The night of too much wine and bad decisions. Seto had focused on his training and his studies, trying to remember his place. He was lucky enough to have the favors of someone in court, to prepare for a_ valuable _position. There wasn't anything more important than that. He couldn't throw it all away for... For a whim._

_The young prince was more than he could ever wish for. Their lives had different paths, and he had to be wise enough to accept it._

_So he had avoided him. It wasn't difficult, considering how much attention the Pharaoh had. Not only his advisors required his time, but the palace was big enough to get lost in it._

_Seto knew the Pharaoh couldn't go after him either, not that it was forbidden, but the word would spread. And the last thing the Kingdom needed was rumors._

_They hadn't seen each other in a while so Seto believed what had happened had been a mistake, and the Pharaoh had forgotten about it. Maybe he didn't remember it. They had been half drunk, after all. That's why he was so surprised when the young Pharaoh smiled at him when they crossed paths -completely by mistake, Seto hadn't realized he was being followed- and pulled him into a secluded room._

_"Pharaoh!"_

_The young man smiled at him, the gold of his clothes almost blinding him. There was no way anyone could ignore who he was. How important he was._

_"Seto, I've been looking all over for you"_

_"I've been... I had things to do, forgive me"_

_The Pharaoh frowned, "Don't need to be so formal with me. Everyone is now..."_

_Seto wanted to say some lame excuse and leave, it would be best for everyone if he did. What he felt the night they kissed... He hadn't felt before. There had been something similar, with a girl. A woman. He hadn't seen her in a while, some nights he wondered if she thought of him as well._

_"Did you need anything from me, ....?"_

_"Your company"_

_Even if Seto stripped him of his gold and put him in regular clothes, anyone would see who he truly was. The young man carried himself with such authority -and slight arrogance- it was clear he was of noble birth. If he needed something, it was more a demand than a question. True, he wouldn't be angry if Seto declined, but why would he? If the Pharaoh takes some of his valuable time for you, you should accept it._

_"My Pharaoh, I'm too-"_

_"Seto" He stepped forward, a hand on Seto's naked arm. "I would never allow anything bad to happen to you. I understand the position you are in... It's okay"_

_Is it? Seto wanted to say, but didn't. There was unrest in the Kingdom, whispers, rumors... A storm was coming, he could see the worry in the Pharaoh's eyes, in the dark shadows underneath them. It was no news the Pharaoh hadn't been resting, not since taking the throne. It couldn't be easy, giving up a life of careless privilege, just to jump into a fiery disaster._

_"It's okay" He moved closer, tipping his head slightly upwards. He wanted a kiss, and it wasn't a demand this time. The Pharaoh was asking, giving him the last word._

_And Seto didn't know what to do. He was flustered, his hands uneasy at his sides._

_He placed a hand on his hip, pulling him closer. There was a gasp, he wasn't sure who it was from._

_And then they were kissing. Desperate, hungry._

_He couldn't blame it on the wine._  
  


Kaiba woke up with a gasp, a hand tightening on the bedspread. He felt sticky with sweat and... _down_ there, which only made him feel disgusting. His mind was swirling with images and sensations he was sure wasn't his'.  

He didn't dare revise some of the most _intense_ parts of the dream. He could still feel a shadow over his lips, like a static running over them. This had never happened before. He had had all the normal signs of 'coming of age' when he was younger, of course. But a dream like that? So vivid, so life-like, so _intense._

Lips kissing naked skin, gasps for air. _More_ , one of them said. Or they both did. It was too much to think about.

The empty space next to him was slightly rumpled, he remembered a duel and then being too tired to lift his hand and... someone tucking him in, small talk. It angered him, that weakness, that show of vulnerability and now _this._ It was as if his body had decided to disobey him, to do what it wanted.

Oh, Goddess, had _he_ been there while he slept? Kaiba was sure he had woken up in the same position he had fallen asleep in, but what if he had mumbled something, or if-... He tried not to feel shame, or anger, but it was overpowering all other feelings.

Without missing a beat, he got up and made way to the en-suite bathroom. This had never happened, and it would never happen again. He needed to get them out, to send him _away._ Bringing him here - _them_ , technically- had been a mistake, a horrible mistake. He had been weak, he had followed a whim, a passing desire, and what now? Now he was a mess, trying to get rid of his clothes as quickly as possible. Disgusted at himself.

Giving in to primal urges wasn't something he liked. And sex... sex wasn't something he _needed._

"Fuck" He groaned, stepping inside the shower and feeling the cold water hit his body. Cold. Extremely cold, as cold as it could go. He had to vanish all ideas from his body.

What if he had stayed after he fell asleep? What if he had _seen_ anything remotely debasing? Kaiba pressed his forehead to the wall, letting the water fall over his back. His skin was starting to get goose bumps from the cold, and he would start to shiver as well. He could handle that, he wasn't a baby. He had handled much worse.

He clasped the soap bar, rubbing it over his skin, making sure his fingernails scratched it as well. He didn't like how this had happened while he was asleep, those _memories,_ those _sensations._ There had been moments in his life when he couldn't control what others did to his body. When his mind had been trapped somewhere else. There was no recollection of what had happened to his _husk_ after losing to Pegasus.

_Losing is death, to lose is to die._ A voice -he tried to suppress it- spoke inside his head.

He doubted Pegasus had done anything to him while he was a puppet, he hadn't gotten that much time. Yugi made sure of that. But the absence of time was there, and he didn't know what had happened during that dark space. Was he humiliated? Used as a servant? thrown in the dungeons to rot? He had woken up in a cell, so it was safe to assume he had been there all that time.

When he left the shower, his lips had started to turn blue, but he felt clean. This was the brief breakdown he would allow himself, not more than that. He was the owner of his future, his body and his mind. No one else.

The memories were deafening. He scrubbed himself with the white towel, trying not to focus too much on the _details_ of his dream. Memory? Dream. Fantasy. It couldn't have been real, none of it. He needed to start listening to his brain instead of following stupid bodily whims.

He rummaged through the clothes on the floor, finding his cell phone. He opened it, quickly calling his most trusted guard. Advisor? Employee?

"Prepare the plane, for later today..." He didn't even say hello, why should he? There was agreement on the other side and a brief 'we'll let the pilot know'. "Excellent"

Seto closed his eyes for a moment, hearing the 'Are you okay, sir?'. No, no he wasn't okay, but he would be. He hadn't gotten this far just to give up.

"Let me know when it's ready" He didn't dignify the question with an answer. He didn't need anyone's help. Why had he believed he did? Asking _him_ to be here was a mistake. One he was going to correct.

Once he had finished getting himself dressed -the high collar shirt was a must, a necessity he didn't even think about-, he made his way to his brother's room. He was worried, that much he knew, and had vowed to be there for him.

The door was closed, but he could hear Mokuba talking. Ugh, surely with that annoying girl. He knocked, trying to respect his privacy and not be the overbearing brother he could be.

"Come in!" There was some shuffling and a 'one moment' before he went in. The room was organized, although not as much as his own. Thankfully Mokuba had retained some of his childhood messiness.

"Brother" He sounded surprised. "Are you alright?"  

"Yes" Seto walked over, sitting on the bed. There was no one else in the room, but Mokuba's laptop was half closed on the bedside. He wanted to take a peak, but didn't. "What time is it?"

His brother frowned, worry written all over his face. Why did it feel like Mokuba was the one taking care of _him_ sometimes? It should be the other way around, it _needed_  to be the other way around.

"It's almost four in the afternoon. Yugi told me you got back and went to bed"

"Mh, yes"

"I thought you were going to duel him and not catch any rest, that would've been-"

Seto frowned as well, and Mokuba rolled his eyes at him "I'm fine, Mokuba"  
  
"Okay then" He looked impatient as if he wanted Seto to leave his room. He wasn't going to overstay his welcome, _even if_ he was the adult. "I'm going to the city later with Anzu and Jou"

"No, you are not. They are leaving later today" He got up, not wanting to see the look of disappointment on his brother's face. "We'll be going back home tomorrow, pack your things"

There was no complaint, Mokuba was too well behaved for that. Sometimes he wanted him to scream at him -and sometimes Mokuba did yell, but they always reconciled afterwards.

It was comical, really, what happened when he left Mokuba's room. Or it would be, ten years from the moment. Kaiba didn't think it was amusing when it happened, of course.

He left the room, hearing his brother's voice on the other side resume the conversation he had been having with _someone._ Kaiba hoped he was being smart about who he associated with.

After closing the door, he turned, and oh, why did he have to turn that way? Yugi was there, or the Pharaoh, or both of them. Did it matter? It brought back memories of _things_ he didn't want to think about. Things that made him angry now. He pressed his lips tightly together, staring down at him.

What to do? How to divert the situation?

"Kaiba, I wanted to talk to you... before we have to leave" The Pharaoh spoke calmly, staring at the man he had known for so long. "I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for what I did to you, back when we-"

"No! No, you don't get to share your guilt with me!" Kaiba raised his tone, almost screaming in the middle of the hallway. They were both tense, but the Pharaoh was as confused as he had ever been. If Seto detached himself from the situation, he could understand why this reaction blindsided the other man. He had been more than accommodating the last few days, _nice_ even, and now he was suddenly hostile. But he had to be. For everyone's sake, for his own well being. To never feel the way he had felt that morning.

"Kaiba... Why? I just want to say I-"

"No, you don't get to do that. And _I_ don't get to free myself of the guilt of Death-T with you either! _We_ don't get to have that"

There was a moment of silence in which both stood, staring, breathing. It was the calm before the storm, right at the edge of the world. The pharaoh didn't know much about himself, but he was an observant man - _spirit?-_ and he could understand what was being left unsaid.

"I'm still sorry" Had he ever apologized? For the things he had done? He didn't know, but something told him he hadn't. Even if his memory wasn't there, he knew he acted like a monarch. Perhaps he wouldn't have noticed that before, but he had the same contemporary knowledge Yugi had.

Kaiba was something else. While everyone else felt normal, common, Kaiba felt like a complete equal in the most bizarre way. The pharaoh could see himself in him, and both respected and admired his dueling techniques. Kaiba was the rival anyone could ask for, but even outside of the duels, he was someone that would keep him guessing. There was something deep within him that yearned for that feeling. Something he couldn't understand.

"We don't have to do this" The pharaoh whispered, giving a step forward. This was his subtle way of offering an olive branch. Subtle, but someone like Kaiba would notice. Of course he noticed.

"It's not me who's doing this"

The Pharaoh couldn't do anything but stare. Then, an idea. A spark.

"Our duel wasn't over"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Hope you liked this chapter, and oh be ready cause angst is coming. 
> 
> Important notes for this chapter:  
> -Death-T is an arc in the manga that basically is Kaiba trying to kill Yugi and his friends. It's a bit more complex than that, and in my opinion it's a direct response to the Pharaoh's actions against Kaiba's mind earlier in the manga.   
> -Pegasus did nothing to Kaiba's body, but I imagine knowing there's a lapse of time in which you can't remember what happened to you would be nerve wracking for someone like Kaiba, who likes to control... everything.  
> -I can't quite remember the Pharaoh's memories arc (woops, I'll get there), but I'm aware he wasn't a Pharaoh for a long time. If I recall correctly it was VERY brief, that being said, I'm obviously changing canon. 
> 
> Anyways, thank you for reading! Please leave a comment if you can <3


	7. Memories

_"Our duel wasn't over"_

Kaiba stared at him, teeth clenched and a fist at his side before nodding. He would never refuse a duel, would he?

"Outside, this time. Grab your duel disk"

The day had changed in the course of a few hours. Clouds had contaminated the sky, making the landscape look grey and lifeless. There wasn't any cold, though, and that could only mean a storm was coming.

Once they were at the customary distance, the pharaoh stared at the other man. "Where we left off?"

There was a nod, and they both made sure to recreate the battle field as much as they could. Black magician girl appeared in front of the pharaoh, Kaiba's monster (Vorse Raider, 1900 attack points. Almost enough) stared at him from the other side. It was difficult to intimidate him, but there was something in Kaiba's eyes that wasn't there before. Anger. Extreme, deep rooted anger. Why?

"With Sage's stone I can summon my Black Magician!" He frowned, starting to feel the emotions run through his body as well. He would show him a duel, he would _defeat_ him.

There was no movement from the tall man, his blue eyes on him -not on his monsters, not on his cards, on _him_.

"Black Magician girl, attack his monster!"

Kaiba seemed to come back to life then, staring at the monster with boredom in his eyes. How dare he?

"Are you trying?" A card raised behind his monster. **Negate attack.** Fine, then. Not only his attack was negated, but his whole battle phase was over. Still, Kaiba was in a bad position. The pharaoh ended his turn.

"I think you know this card" He said with a smirk "It's not usually in my deck, true" When his fingers flipped it, the pharaoh gritted his teeth. "I can't say this isn't satisfying"

He placed Change of Heart on his duel disk, and his Black Magician Girl ended on Kaiba's side of the field. The pharaoh tried not to be hurt by it, by how recklessly Kaiba was treating his cards.

Of course, he sacrificed both his monsters to bring his Blue Eyes to the field. No surprises there.

"Blue eyes, lay waste to his Black Magician! _White lightning!_ "

Kaiba - 4000  
Pharaoh - 3500

"I end my turn"

The pharaoh groaned, staring at his Graveyard zone. Two of his most powerful monsters were done for, and Kaiba had his blue eyes. Not that it was all lost, because it wasn't.

"You are leaving. Today" Kaiba spoke with no mercy, staring at him.

The Pharaoh's hand stopped for a moment, holding a card just inches away from the duel disk. He had expected to have that week, just a little bit more time... Not to be kicked out so suddenly. Something had happened, and he had no idea what it was.

"Kaiba! You wanted me here, why can't you accept what it's happening to you?"

The man didn't flinch, all of his barriers high up. There was distance between them, one that hadn't been there the days before. The Pharaoh almost wanted to scream, but instead he decided to focus his energy on the duel.

"I will _never_ believe all your nonsense, _Pharaoh_ " he was mocking, cruel. Why? Those past few days he had started to wonder if _rest_ was truly what he wanted, his wish, and it scared him to think about an alternative. He was an old soul, trapped inside a puzzle. There was only one way to go.

"Be reasonable!" He groaned, and places the card face down on his disk.

Kaiba didn't flinch.

"Reasonable? There's nothing _reasonable_ about having some man's _supposed_ memories inside my head!"

The Pharaoh gave a step back. Oh.

"You are angry at me" He's jealous, he's jealous, he's jealous. The Pharaoh was struck by it with such force he didn't know how to react. He could see the problem clearly now, Kaiba was a force to be reckoned with, and he would never settle for less. He wouldn't, either. The thought of the pharaoh having shared any sort of feelings for _someone,_ even if that someone was so _closely_ related to him was unthinkable for Kaiba.

There was a lot unsaid in those statements, but the longing was there and they could both understand it. Kaiba had showed too much, which meant he was going to strike him with everything he had. He was going to lash out, and be cruel for he felt rejected.

The worst part of it all was he didn't have any memories, he couldn't reassure him. Had he loved another? If he did, he didn't remember it. Something told him he hadn't loved before, or he would still feel it. Love doesn't fade, not like memories. You can lock someone up and strip them of their humanity or their memories or their name, but can you take away the love?

Would he remember Yugi or Kaiba if he were to lose his modern world memories?

"It's still your turn, _Pharaoh_ "

The way he said it...

"You are right" He spoke calmly, placing a monster in face down defense position and ending his turn "You and him are two different people. You told me it's like telling another person's story, yes?" No answer, he didn't expect one. "Surely, he wasn't as obnoxious as you are"

_Other me, that's not helping._

He ignored Yugi, knowing him and Kaiba had a way and... perhaps it wasn't always nice and easy and fairytale-like.

"Blue eyes, _attack_!"

The pharaoh had gotten him to be reckless, to not look at the field at all. Was he that distraught?

" _Mirror force_ " There was a groan from the other side, and the Blue Eyes White Dragon found its way to the cemetery, with his own monsters.

Kaiba's field was empty, he only had to flip summon his monster and use monster reborn... He closed his eyes for a moment.

"Kaiba..."

"Just _end it_ already!"

They stared at each other through the short distance, that somehow, felt immense. He wasn't asking him to end the duel, there was more to that. Much more to that.

The Pharaoh bit his lip. Of course Kaiba would make it hurt, he would make him _feel_ it.

He won. And he lost. And he stayed outside until it started raining and his partner took over.

***

The plane was set up outside the mansion on the landing pad designed specifically for Kaiba. He knew this sort of things made people think he was a spoiled brat. He crossed his arms over his chest, staring at the four visitors -technically five, counting the Pharaoh- and their belongings.

Normally he would be the one to fly the plane, but he had called a group of pilots to do so. There was no point in going to Egypt with them, and he wasn't going to. The last few days had been revealing. It didn't matter what he might think he felt, there was nothing there for him. Nothing at all.

The Pharaoh, if he truly was what he said he was, would go to the afterlife with his _dear_ lover. It sickened him.

"Kaiba" Anzu, that stupid girl, walked straight in front of him. She didn't seem scared of him, and there was an odd respect he felt for her. He would never say so out loud, of course. "Thank you for letting us stay here, it was nice"

He nodded politely, although he was sure she knew this hadn't been done out of kindness and selflessness. There were muttered "yeah, thanks" from the other two boys. The Pharaoh said nothing. It angered him how easily it was to differentiate them.

"Well, give Mokuba a hug from us" She said, before turning and going up the stairs into the plane. Honda and Jonouchi followed her starting to bicker about who would get which room -they were all exactly the same.

"Kaiba" The Pharaoh walked to him, frowning, serious. "I guess this is goodbye?"

He nodded again, once.

"You have made things very hard for me" He blinked, swallowing his pride for a moment. "I hope you have a nice life"

Something passed across his face, emotions, too many to count. And then he repressed them, all of them. Hoping the Pharaoh hadn't noticed any of it. "I'm sure you'll have a great afterlife"

His voice was venomous, he knew that, but he felt like a snake. Why bother hiding it behind pleasantries?

He stood there, watching as the Pharaoh turned and walked towards the plane's small stair.

"Wait! _Wait_!"

"Mokuba?" He turned to see his little brother hurrying after them, a suitcase on one of his hands. It was a heavy one, and he quickly took it from his hands. "What are you doing?"

He looked up, defiance written all over his small face "Get on the plane, we are going with them"

The Pharaoh had stopped and turned, staring at them with a small smirk "It's better if you don't, it'll be dangerous"

Mokuba shook his head, and when he didn't see his brother move, decided to take the matters into his own hands.

"Fine, be difficult" He shrugged and ran up into the plane, knowing Kaiba would never let him go alone towards danger. Damn it.

Still, he stood on the same spot for a couple moments, staring ahead as if he couldn't believe what he had to do.

"You should come" The Pharaoh stared at him, a hand on the small railing "it will be dangerous"

"I'm only doing this for Mokuba" He added, as if he needed to. The Pharaoh got on the plane, finally, and he followed without thinking about it too much.

The plane was _expensive,_ with individual rooms for four people and some seating in a common area. His little brother was already talking to Anzu and the others, being sociable. It was good, he knew that. With a sigh, he walked straight for the pilots, since he would be on the flight, he would give directions.

The plane took off seamlessly, and Kaiba made sure to stay in the cockpit for as long as possible. They had set a course to Egypt that would last for 12 hours, maybe 12 and a half. It was too much time to be locked in a small space with him. So he waited until his legs felt sore from the tight space between the chair and the computer panel.

He gave the pilots some strict orders before walking towards the seating room. Mokuba was typing away on his laptop, listening to some music or a TV show. Kaiba allowed himself a moment to observe him. He smiled, briefly, and turned towards the bedrooms. They were quite simple, a bed, a wardrobe and a wall shelf acting as a night table. It was more than enough for a plane of this magnitude, but he was sure he could still improve it somehow.

It wasn't a surprise to find Yugi inside the room. Someone would have to share, and yes, he could force Honda and Jonouchi to share and Mokuba to sleep with him but... But...

But.

"Kaiba" Yugi blinked, he was already in his night clothes. "I'll let you two talk"

That's not necessary, he wanted to say. The Pharaoh was there before he could open his mouth.

"I'll sleep on the floor"

Kaiba frowned and shook his head. That was the perfect moment to say he wasn't going to sleep there, that he'd go to another room or rest on the sitting lounge or anything of the sort.

"No" that's all he said, making the Pharaoh's eyes focus on him. His pupils dilated.

"Is it safe to presume you are no longer angry at me?"

"I never said I was"

He scoffed "Don't take me for a fool. You were angry, kicking me out like a scorned lover"

The word hanged between them. "Don't you want your memories? Well, here you go!"

The Pharaoh raised his arms in frustration "You are impossible! How can you compare yourself to someone I can't even remember?"

"You said we were the same person, did you not? All this time..."

"Well, if you and him are the same then what's all this fuss about?!"

Kaiba gritted his teeth. The problem was, that man in his vision wasn't him. If it was him, it would all be easier somehow. At least between the both of them. But that man, that Priest that had loved a woman -only to lose her- and loved the Pharaoh wasn't him. And as far as they both knew, the Pharaoh's feelings were a mystery to him. What if he loved that man that had lived 3 thousand years ago? He couldn't be him. And he wouldn't have the scraps.

"I'm not him" His voice was steady, and the Pharaoh nodded once.

"What is it, then? Kaiba, what did you see...?" he walked closer, too close. Why was he asking? He must know. Right? One of his hands moved towards Seto's face, but he grabbed it by the wrist before it touched his skin. Violet eyes stared at him, questioning.

"You two had a... An affair of sorts"

The Pharaoh didn't flinch, he didn't react at all "I don't know about that, Kaiba... It could not be what you-"

"Now who's taking who for a fool?"

There was silence while Kaiba loosened the grip on his wrist, their hands touching. The Pharaoh held his hand, dragging his fingers against Kaiba's. He looked down at their hands, had he ever held hands with someone? Swallowing, he allowed the touch.

"I think..."

"You can't remember... Don't make false claims"

"I think I would remember if I loved someone as strongly as..."

Kaiba let go of his hand, walking away from him. The room was tiny, but he put some distance between them nonetheless.

"Kaiba"

"I don't want to hear it"

There was a frustrated sigh, and yeah, he felt the same way. Or even more. Gritting his teeth, he stared at him "It's all or nothing with me, Pharaoh"

The implications of his words rippled through his bones, shaking him to his very core. He wasn't used to exposing himself this way to anyone. There was one person he ever showed any love or affection to, and that was it. Until, well, him.

There was a nod, that meant 'I understand'. It wasn't a confirmation, which made Kaiba's heart hurt, but it wasn't a blatant lie. Any promise made then, could be rendered null the moment the Pharaoh recovered his memories. He could almost hear him now, his patronizing tone, a small condescending smile and the words 'sorry, but there's always been someone else'. Kaiba appreciated his silence. It was respectful.

"Stay" He whispered regardless, and Kaiba agreed. There were many reasons not to agree, but... This could be their last night. Hadn't he always wanted this? One way or the other... Who else would he ever share a bed with? Not that they were going to do anything remotely sexual, but as an equal, Kaiba couldn't think of anyone else.

He took his coat off, and his shoes but left the rest of his clothes on. The pharaoh arched an eyebrow at him, leaving him room on the small bed. It was supposed to be for one person, but... it would have to do.

Kaiba sat on the bed, and after taking a few calming breaths, lay down on his side, his back turned to him. Staying with him didn't mean he was going to change, or cuddle him or be... any different. This was just company, just a mirage of what could have been. Had he not been in love with someone else.

He frowned, gritting his teeth.

"Kaiba... you are incredible, you know that?"

"Yes"

"I didn't mean it as a compliment" The pharaoh shifted behind him, on his side as well. He wondered if he was staring at the back of his head, or if he had decided to just turn his back to him as well. "Jealous of someone that might not have been... Absolutely ridiculous"

"You are ridiculous"

"Oh, the childish comeback? Really?"

Not his proudest moment.

"Just go to sleep"

"I don't sleep, remember?"

Kaiba groaned, wanting to curl up but unable to do so without bumping his back against the pharaoh.

"Can I put my arm around you?" It was a whisper, and he felt it so close it made the hairs on the back of his head rise up. His heartbeat accelerated, but it had been the first time someone _asked_ before touching him, which was extremely appreciated.

Kaiba took a deep breath but nodded, softly.

The mattress dipped while the pharaoh adjusted his body, and Kaiba felt his hand right over his stomach. He wasn't pushing himself against him or anything, which he appreciated.

Kaiba sucked in a breath, feeling the warmth of his hand break through his shirt and imprint itself inside his skin. With no self respect, he moved back, pushing _himself_ against the pharaoh. The man took it as a sign, and hugged him properly. Kaiba couldn't imagine it being very comfortable, given how he was much taller than the pharaoh. There were no complains.

There's something addictive about being touched after so long, like a need that sweeps away every other thought.

"Turn around" It was a whisper, somewhere close to his ear, very, very close.

He didn't move. "Good night, pharaoh"

The arm around his middle squeezed him for a moment, and then there was silence. How was he going to fall asleep? There was nothing that both terrified and excited him  like the idea of turning around and giving in to the thing he wanted the most.

Kaiba closed his eyes, slowing down his breathing. He could handle this, he could do this. There would be many nights on his own, anyway, no point in tasting something you might never try again.

**

_"Leave us"_

_The special priests -embalmers, the ones dedicated to one of the most sacred duties- didn't hide their surprise. The process was long, and it was conducted without interruptions. They couldn't deny him, though. They were bound to him now._

_One of the men dared walk towards him, hands clasped in front of his white linen clothes "Pharaoh, it would be best for us to continue. We mustn't be disturbed"_

_Seto didn't move, simply staring past him, to the stone slate where the body rested._

_"Leave"_

_The three priests stared at each other, before nodding and ruefully leaving the room. The torches were burning bright that night, and he wondered if it mattered. His soul wasn't here anymore, not in his body and not in the afterlife. He knew he was trapped. And that hurt more than he would ever say._

_So many were gone now._

_Seto walked forward, the gold heavy on his skin. He had wanted it, once. He regretted it now._

_He could smell the salt in the air, the drying process had begun. Sooner rather than latter he wouldn't be soft anymore. His skin would dry, to be preserved of course, and even his eyes would be replaced. Everything would be done to keep him looking like he was, or as close as possible._

_Seto's blue eyes went to the jars. Good. He had wanted the rites to be conducted as they should. The Pharaoh would need his body in the afterlife, even if it took years for him to get there._

_His mouth dried, and he found himself kneeling next to the body. The guilt ate Seto from the inside out. Guilt for the pain he felt. He was grieving, but should he? The Pharaoh had done something brave, and he had perished yes, but Seto was a firm believer of life after death._

_Maybe that was it. The fear of him not being able to continue with his life. There might never be an afterlife for the young Pharaoh whose reign was short and his name struck from every stone. It ate him alive._

_Seto wasn't supposed to be there, but what harm could it do? He had placed the Millenium puzzle in its resting place, and he had been so careful with it... Seto wasn't a man who cried, but he had once the items were sealed and he was alone in his room._

_Alone in his room, and alone in the world. Alone now with this corpse._

_"You are not here" He whispered, a hand -daring, disobedient, wild- touched his hair. It felt as soft as it had ever been, and for a moment his mind sparked with hope he were only asleep._

_The smell of salt brought him back._

_What to say? There had been no time for goodbyes before. And now there wasn't anyone to hear it. Not really, only an empty shell. A mirage._

_He wasn't there, but he was. All at once._

_"I'm sorry" it sounded strange, strangled. Seto wondered if he knew how sorry he was, if he felt it. If he had felt it as he... He would never know._

_He leaned forward, kissing his forehead. He shouldn't, oh, how he shouldn't. His skin was dry, and would get drier. Seto knew the embalming process, the rites. He had studied to become a priest, and even though he wasn't going to be in charge of the burial rites, he had learned enough._

_The now nameless Pharaoh would be there for seventy days, and then he wouldn't see him again. Would he forget his face? His voice? How warm his skin felt?_

_His skin wasn't warm now. It was dry, and it was cold._

_"You are not here" This time it was for himself, and he mumbled it once more while getting up. He didn't cry. His hands were trembling, but he walked away. He could only carry on, and... Make his sacrifice worth something._

_And hope for his return. It hurt to even think about, but... It was what made him get up every morning._

_Slowly, he turned from him, walking towards the entrance. He knew the priests were waiting outside -listening? They wouldn't gossip-, eager to continue the rites. Seto tried not to think what he thought when the sadness took the better of himself: 'you left me, you all left me'. He tried not to think about it, because it made him think of Kisara as well. Cold, limp, lifeless in his arms. First her, then him. Now he only had a stone with a dragon that shouldn't be used._

_He had cold gold on his skin and weight on his shoulders. He had the life others had wanted for him._

_But nothing else_.

He didn't woke up startled nor gasping, instead he felt a blazing hand around his throat squeezing so hard it might kill him. Real or not, seeing him about to be mummified was as horrifying as it sounded. The worst being the possibility of the Pharaoh leaving them. Dying or... Moving on or whatever bullshit everyone thought.

Kaiba wasn't ready for that. The arm around his body was still there, and he felt the man's breathing behind him. He was here, and he was alive. Real or not real, 3 thousand year old pharaoh or not, he was there.

He didn't move away as he turned around on the bed, coming face to face with him. The Pharaoh was awake, and didn't seem tired at all.

"Couldn't sleep?"

"Bad dream" His voice was husky and he had to place a hand on the boy's hip, there was nowhere else to put it.

"Sorry to hear that"

His eyes were ablaze, the same they were when they dueled. Kaiba tried not to think of that bad excuse of a duel he had had with him before leaving. It certainly hadn't been his best attempt, he had been too overwhelmed by emotions -anger, mostly- to think properly. His strategy was good, but he ignored the field, and the fight, and focused solely on... Him. Bad, bad duel. Had the Pharaoh taken offense? He would, if the Pharaoh didn't give his all.

"Hey" His hand touched Kaiba's chin "come back"

"I'm here...?"

"You were lost in thought"

Ah. Kaiba stared at him and moved his hand from his hip to his lower back, pulling him closer until their chests touched. There was a sharp breath from the other man, which only made him want _more_ , but when he leaned in, the Pharaoh turned his face away.

It was like being slapped with a hot iron.

"I wish we could"

Kaiba was pulling his hand away from him, ready to leave because why stay where you are not wanted? Before he could even sit on the bed, the Pharaoh hugged him incredibly tight, burying his face on his chest.

"This is not my body" He heard his voice, muffled against his shirt.

Oh.

"I... I didn't mean.. Didn't think of that"

"I can't do this to my partner, Kaiba" he pushed himself closer to him, making Kaiba place both hands around him, holding him, steadying him.

"Not even a...?" Was this begging? Had he stoop this low for a little bit of affection? Could he be more _basic_?

"He's never kissed anyone" The Pharaoh moved his face to stare at him, longing in his eyes. "I wish we could"

"I understand"

And he did, which meant he only respected the Pharaoh even more. And that made him want to kiss him harder.

They held each other's gazes without moving away, it didn't make anything easier. There were plenty of questions on Kaiba's brain, hard not to think too much, when the situation became more and more complicated. Hypothetically, if the Pharaoh was who he said he was and there was a big chance he would end up _leaving_ them, then surely they could...?

He finally closed his eyes, frustrated to no end.

"Kaiba, I'm sorry"

"Don't be sorry" He stared at him "What will happen tomorrow?"

"Ishizu and Marik will be waiting for us, they'll take us to..."

"Yes?"

"To my tomb"

"Ah"

The dream felt too real then, squeezing at his throat again. He wouldn't cry, he didn't know how to anymore. What if those dreams, despite what everyone thought they were, were a warning? Some sort of premonition?

"And then?"

The pharaoh sighed, he seemed as frustrated as he was. "I do not know"

"But you have ideas"

"Yes" Lilac eyes avoided him "I think I'll leave the puzzle"

He didn't want to ask anything else, he didn't want more excuses or stories or anything like it. Instead, he leaned forward, pressing his face to the space between the pharaoh's shoulder and neck. If he tried to remember -not that he tried- the last time someone had hugged him tightly -so tight he ran out of air- he was sure he would have to go back to the time when his father was alive. His _real_ father. The one that was too painful to think about.

Sadly, he didn't truly remember the last hug his father gave him. Had it been the day he died? The day before? He hadn't been paying attention. He had taken it for granted. And then one day his father wasn't there anymore and no one cared enough to hug him. He had needed it then, but not now.

Back in the orphanage, he learnt how to survive on his own, for the good of both of them. There weren't any grownups that cared for them. Not really.

And after Gozaburo, the thought of someone touching him was demeaning. No. The thought of him _needing_ a touch was demeaning.

Back then and until now, no one had been the pharaoh. He hadn't met anyone he considered an equal. That changed things, and he didn't mind to accept it.

Right now he had an opportunity to remember what his hug felt like. If all the stories he had been hearing for the past two years were real, and the pharaoh was about to leave them... he wanted to remember how this felt.

There was no doubt in his mind, of course, he wouldn't at least try to bring him back if he suddenly disappeared. Because if souls exist, if all that bullshit is real, then he could be able to bring him back.

He had lost everything, once, and built up his life from there. He wouldn't lose anything, ever again.

The pharaoh pressed his cheek against his head, his hands steady on his back. There was something calming about his presence. Different from the way he was when they dueled. Kaiba bit down on his lip, pressing himself a bit further into the hug. His legs were too long, and they clashed with his' but he didn't mind.

At one point in the night -how long had it been?- he felt a kiss on the top of his head. Quick, strong, with _intention._ Despite not wanting to, his body tensed and he pulled the boy closer.

"Sorry"

"Stop being sorry" He groaned, annoyed but not really "just... stop being sorry"

The pharaoh chuckled, and he felt his nod, a hand going up and down his back. He didn't want to fall asleep, so he didn't. 

***

"Pharaoh, welcome home" Ishizu bowed very slightly, with a smile on her lips. Her brother rolled her eyes but smiled at the group nonetheless. "I hope you had a nice flight"

"It was good, thank you" There was tension in the air, from all of them, as if they could sense the danger that was near.

"Let us take you to your memories, then" She smiled, leading them towards a deep, dark entrance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for that duel, I'm no mastermind! And it's actually really hard to write duels?  
> I'm so proud of the next chapter, I've already been writing it because I just... felt inspired I guess? So I'll update soon-ish!
> 
> <3


	8. An empty Tomb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

There was enough space from the chair he was sitting on to the bed, where the Pharaoh was in a deep slumber. Somehow they all had silently agreed he was the one who should take care of him. He had no complaints.

He remembered leaving the tomb, as the ceremonial duel was taking place. It's not he didn't want to know, he just couldn't stand there and watch. Dejected, broken, he had waited outside next to his car for Mokuba to follow him.

He had a name now. Atem, they told him. And just hearing it tugged at his heart so much he himself carried him to bed.

Ishizu had given them the master bedroom, which implied more than enough. If only they knew they hadn't even...*

The Pharaoh's, no, Atem's chest rise and fell slowly. While changing his clothes, he had noticed scars on his chest in the shape of the now missing millenium puzzle. Missing, or destroyed? Fused inside the nameless Pharaoh? Could it be, his soul was inside this body?

His body, no doubt about that, dark skinned sleeping beauty. Kaiba pressed his hands on his chin, elbows on his knees, leaning forward to stare at him. Atem recovered his memories, and they had crossed paths just for a brief moment. The pharaoh had been shaken, and somehow he seemed even more determined to whatever it was he had to do to leave the puzzle. Or something. Atem was hard to read.

He had whispered something to him, though, the moment he walked by. A single phrase, but it made him leave during the duel. He couldn't stomach it.

_Priest Seto and I weren't a couple._ Had he truly misunderstood it? In those strange visions he had seen kisses, hands touching skin... True, it had only happened twice, and Kaiba had started to believe the other things had been just... Wet dreams. Straight out of his own mind.

He hated how much he needed to hear him say it again. Because if Atem was interested in him simply because it reminded him of someone else... He wouldn't accept it. _All or nothing._

Right now, though, he had other worries in mind. Yuugi and him had undressed him -or, well, unwrapped him- and put some sleeping clothes on him. Kaiba tried not to stare, but his body was so beautiful, honey brown skin, muscles where he didn't think he would have any. Atem lacked the gold, though, somehow looking more naked without it.

The worry came when he didn't wake up. Ishizu said he was recovering, it was a shock to his body, all that magic. He needed the rest. His soul had gone through a great ordeal, she had said. Kaiba hadn't been listening, his arms holding the Pharaoh's almost passed out form. He remembered it now, his face exposed, labored breaths, an arm trying to remove the linen strips across his chest.

Kaiba hadn't quite behaved as he expected to. Everyone was talking, trying to understand what had happened, _how_ it happened, but he was staring at the Pharaoh. His lips moved, but nothing came from them. A hand, tugging over his chests, desperately. Kaiba could feel his other arm still wrapped tightly to his side. How traumatic had it been? To wake up like this? To find himself inside his...?

"I need a knife!" He groaned, kneeling on the floor, holding Atem upright with an arm on his lap, the other one extended to the group. They had all stopped and stared, lost for a moment. "Knife, anything sharp!"

Marik moved, which in hindsight wasn't surprising, and threw him a pocket knife. It was enough to cut through the layers of strips on his chest. The Pharaoh gasped loudly for air, his ribcage able to expand. How had they not realized?

Kaiba should have gotten up from the floor after that, he knows he should've. He didn't. Instead, he pulled Atem closer to his chest, feeling his head rest on his shoulder.

"Kaiba" he had whispered. Not Seto, not Set, not Priest or whatever other name he could've said. It made his chest flutter in a way that was, surely, shameful. "My name... Atem" he moved to the side suddenly, gagging, his whole body spasming over Seto's arms. He threw up. Sand.

After that, he fainted and everyone agreed it would be best to get him to a bed and look for some medical help. Or magical help. Kaiba didn't protest. He didn't care if magic was real or not, right now... It all felt real.

People came to see him, a doctor, and then a Priest (not the type you would find in a church, of course). Kaiba didn't hear what they said, his eyes focused on the shape on the bed, and the rising and falling of his chest.

Yuugi had stayed as well, for a while. And after trying, and succeeding, to explain to him what the doctor had said, he left them alone. According to the doctor, Atem had some pneumonia and would get better in a few days. Obviously they avoided the whole back from the dead thing, which Kaiba was sure would affect his diagnosis.

The priest, instead, said he was drained of energy and needed to rest. His body had gone through a traumatic experience and he needed to fight one final battle. He had to resist, to hold on. If he died now, in this body, that was it. There was no Millenium puzzle to go back to. He was as human as Kaiba.

It was late, the clock marked 3 past midnight and he still wasn't tired. He was worried, and focused.

Focused on his breathing.

There was movement on the bed, just enough to make him straighten his back and close his fists over his knees. Atem groaned, his head barely turning, eyelids heavy.

"Kaiba?"

"I'm here" He mumbled, and his purple eyes found him. There was relief on his face, and something else.

"Where are we?" he groaned, moving a hand to his throat, it probably hurt.

"Thirsty? Here" He got up, and offered him a glass of water he had had waiting for him to wake up.

"Thanks" He closed his eyes, but didn't move.

Kaiba clenched his jaw, sitting down and placing a hand behind Atem's head. He tilted it slightly while resting the cup on his lower lip. He moved the glass very slowly, hearing the small swallows the man was taking. When Atem frowned slightly, he pulled the glass away, leaving it on the night stand again.

There was something fragile about his body, something that hadn't been there before. Kaiba didn't like it. The thought of him dying. It petrified him.

He remained on the edge of the bed, staring at him with his back towards the bedroom door. There was no logic in the need of staying, but he felt if he stopped watching at him, he would die. Vanish. Like his parents had, so long ago.

Earlier that day he had left the ritual duel on his own volition, but once outside the guilt had started to simmer inside his gut. They hadn't had a chance, not a real one, and there were things on his mind, things he wanted to say to him. But watching the duel... he had to leave.

In fact, he wanted to leave right then. He hadn't been inside the hospital room the night his mother gave birth to Mokuba, the night she died. He hadn't seen her, hadn't said goodbye.

He kept staring at him, and his chest.

_Please keep breathing, please._

There was a brief knock on the door, Kaiba wasn't fast enough -or awake enough- to say anything before it opened. Ishizu walked in, a sorrowful smile on her lips, her gaze traveling directly to the sleeping pharaoh.

Everyone was on edge, they had done something impossible. What had happened, _exactly?_ No one would tell him, and not like he asked. While he changed Atem's clothes with Yuugi, he had asked. What happened?, he had said. Yuugi had looked at him and shook his head. We had to give him CPR before getting out of the Tomb, he said.

Kaiba didn't ask for more clarification after that. He didn't want to know the extent of the Pharaoh's wounds -alright, he did want to know and he had hacked into the Hospital records for it.-, he wanted to understand how he was inside this body. _His_ body.

"Has he woken up?"

"Briefly, for some water"

She nodded, her hands clasped tightly in front of her. Seto could only imagine the atmosphere outside of the room. Not only was Atem fighting for his life, but Ryou Bakura was in a pretty bad state. Marik had _insisted_ on helping him recover. Guilt, surely.

"Ishizu, what happened in there? I saw part of the duel, this was never part of the... deal"

"Ah, yes" There was a thoughtful expression on her face "We didn't think it would work, or I didn't"

"We? Who's we?" He was getting impatient, but kept a low tone as to not bother Atem's rest.

Ishizu frowned at him, almost as if she expected him to know "Why, me and Mokuba, of course"

_What._

Kaiba got up from the bed as if someone pushed him, and stared down at the woman. She was intimidating, gorgeous, and irritating. Kaiba respected her as much as he respected anyone else -which, perhaps, wasn't much to say- but involving his little brother with all of this? It was unforgivable.

" _My_ brother got mixed with all this... _bullshit_?"

If Ishizu was intimidated she didn't show it. Years living with Marik had probably hardened her. Kaiba recognized the similarities in their shitty upbringing, but he wouldn't bring it up. What for? they definitely weren't friends.

"He called me, Seto. You can relax" She spoke as calmly as ever, which only infuriated more. "He was worried about you, and told me if the pharaoh made you happy, then he would help you. I told him everything I know, leaving out the... gory details, of course. I didn't forget he's a child" That eased some of his worries, but not all of them. He couldn't have Mokuba believing in fairytales and magic and _cheating_ death. "He asked if we could get Atem a body. He even proposed you built one for him"

Mokuba, always having so much faith in him.

"I told him I knew where the pharaoh's mummy was, and we... did some research"

Kaiba looked back at the shape on the bed, so that was why he had been tightly wrapped in linen strips. All his body hidden, preserved. He wasn't a big Ancient Egypt connoisseur but he knew mummification took more than just wrapping a body. How could he be... so alive?

"Not even I understand everything that happened in there, Seto" She lowered her eyes for a moment, remembering? He should've stayed. "The doors opened for him, the afterlife was right there. His soul was free"

"Then why...?"

"Perhaps he chose to stay, his soul found his body. No one knew what was going to happen. We told no one we were bringing his corpse from the museum"

A museum. Bile bubbled up inside Kaiba. How dare they keep Atem in a _museum?_ If he thought about it, about all the mummies in all the museums... he was going to be sick. Instead, he sat on the edge of the bed, trying not to think if he had passed right next to him when Ishizu invited him that one time.

"His soul could've ended up trapped inside a corpse. He could have been rejected by it, he could have been unable to return. We don't know. But the doors closed and he wasn't there and then we heard muffled whimpering"

Kaiba was lucky he had sat moments ago, or his legs would've given out. He woke up... trapped?

"I knew where the sounds came from, I took him there after all... I cut through to see his face and he looked young... whole. I couldn't believe it. It makes no sense, I know" 

He didn't know how to respond to all of _that._ A part of himself was trying to shut down completely, rejecting every single piece of magic that emanated from this story.

"Kaiba?" She whispered now, staring back at him. "Go easy on him... I can only imagine what it's like to be alive again after 3.000 years"

He should've been offended at the implication he _wouldn't_ go easy on the Pharaoh at this moment, but he only nodded. Usually, going _easy_ on Atem was out of the question, because the other would resent it. They were equals, rivals, they went all in with everything they got.

Atem was too weak now. He wouldn't hurt him.

Ishizu gave one last glance before leaving the room, surely to reassure the rest. Were they going to come in one at a time? Kaiba suddenly felt like a _boyfriend_ at the side of his partner's sickly body and felt the need to run. To get up, to go to his own room, lock himself in there and let things sort themselves out.

It wasn't the thought of being confused with his _boyfriend_ that scared him, it was _those specific people_ meddling with his life. Not only that, but the pharaoh and him... were nothing yet.

Atem might very well reject him if he sees disapproval from his friends. The solution comes to mind but he rejects it immediately, he isn't going to change his whole personality just to be _liked._ He hopes Atem wouldn't like that either, he hopes he would find it demeaning if he changed that much.

Kaiba stares at his chest, up and down, over and over. He has no intentions of being utterly cruel to them, there's a underlying respect for Yuugi -and some of the others- after all.

The pharaoh shifts again in his slumber, coughing, his lips parting. And then he starts to shiver, so violently his teeth clatter and the bedding shakes with him.

"Pharaoh? Atem!" He reaches out to him, touching his body, finding it burning. A fever? "Ishizu! Yuugi!" He doesn't know who to call out for, so he just throws the first names that come to mind. Mokuba comes to mind as well, but he's a child and he would never involve him in something that could... hurt him.

Hurt all of them.

Atem doesn't stop shaking, even while he's holding him down and when the door opens there's a gasp. Ishizu? Yuugi? Someone else? He can't see, he's focused only on the pharaoh and trying to restrain his movements. His genius brain, as marvelous as it is, appears to malfunction and he can't process what's happening. He has an endless supply of information, about technology, history, and some basics in human biology. But this? Seizure? Fever? He feels lost. This isn't his territory.

He moves a hand, pushing at something without realizing Honda has just pulled him away from the bed with such force he's bound to have bruises in the morning. Yuugi is giving him a weird look while Ishizu says something he can't catch.

When he looks to his side, pulling one of his arms free from Honda's grasp, he realizes the man is also talking to him. What is he saying? he can't quite tell.

Ishizu moves away from the bed, pulling a cell phone from her pocket. Of course, a doctor. How did he not think of that?

"Let go of me, I'm fine!" Kaiba groans, moving away from Honda's clutch and staring back at the bed. His shivering is less violent now, but it's still happening. How long has it been? Ten minutes? No, less. It has to be less.

"You were smothering him"

"I _wasn't_ " There's indignation in his voice, but no one seems to care all that much. "He was..." _I wanted him to stop,_ he thinks. Was he really hurting him?

"The doctor's on the way" Ishizu says, nervousness on her voice. There's a gathering outside the bedroom door, and he almost thinks he can see Marik's hair.

There's silence, barely interrupted by the clattering of Atem's teeth. Kaiba focuses on the way he's sweating, dampening the sheets and the clothes they got him into. He tries not to think this is as bad as it looks.

When he finally stops, Kaiba is sure 15 minutes have passed, or maybe a couple more. There was a brief lapse of time in which he wasn't thinking correctly.

The man on the bed stirs, and everyone is extremely still.

"Kaiba..."

The words send electricity through his whole body, and it also makes him blush. He hopes no one noticed. There's stunned silence as well, nobody truly _believing_ that out of all those people he would call for him. It fills him with pride, and yes, it's great for his ego. But right then and there, his ego is the least of his worries. Atem is sick, he can see that.

"Here" He doesn't move near the bed, not wanting to make a big display of emotions that might not be corresponded. Atem tries to focus his eyes, barely moving his head and another coughing fit strikes him, forcing him to move to the side. There's no sand coming out of his mouth now, only saliva mixed with... something yellow?

It's less than decorous, and Kaiba hates that everyone's there to see him so weak. He wouldn't want to be seen like this, so he's sure the pharaoh wouldn't either.

"Where's this doctor?" He groans, while Yuugi places a cloth handkerchief on his partner's hand. There's barely a movement, but Atem manages to clean the corners of his mouth and give a small smile to his partner. There's a bond there, and Kaiba tries not to feel jealous.

"It's only been ten minutes, Kaiba" Anzu quips from outside the room, pacing.

They all hear the front door's bell, and Kaiba isn't quite sure who drags the doctor in, but in a split second they have a woman dressed on a white robe. They send a different one now, and Kaiba is going to have a word -or a hundred- with the Hospital.

"What's going on here?" She asks, frowning at the amount of people "Please, we need room... What's your name?" She looks at Atem with, no, she doesn't _look,_ she _studies_ him. Kaiba likes her then, for speaking to him directly and not like a thing to be prodded.

The Pharaoh doesn't respond, but his lips do move.

"His name's Atem" Yuugi speaks, while Ishizu ushers everyone else from the room. Everyone except him and Yuugi.

"Alright, Atem... Age?"

Silence. What to say?

"Eighteen" It feels like a good compromise, it's the age he should have. The same as Yuugi, it will be easier if they are the same age. "He started with the symptoms today. Coughing, shortness of breath"

Kaiba wants to recall everything that happened to him, but he can't speak. Not at first, at least. The doctor nods, moving Atem so he's laying on his back. His breathing is much faster now, Kaiba can tell, since he's been watching his chest non-stop.

The woman frowns at the strange scarring on his chest, but places the stethoscope on her ears to listen at his lungs. There's alarm on her eyes, but she conceals it. Not fast enough, although he appreciated the effort.

His temperature is high, extremely so and she's writing furiously on a sheet of paper.

"He experienced shivering, yes?" Kaiba nods "How bad was the shivering, did the bed move, his teeth made sounds?" Kaiba nods, again "Okay... He has severe pneumonia, he needs to be in a hospital"

No. Oh, no. No.

Yuugi nods, because of course he does. "Oh, he's not vaccinated"

The woman does a double take, placing the stethoscope around her neck again. "No vaccines? None at all?"

"It's a long story" Kaiba finally finds his voice "Tell me the name of the best hospital in the Country" He's demanding, but he doesn't look intimated. Is she used to dealing with grieving families, angry boyfriends? "Send him there"

There's a proud huff "We have the best hospitals, Mr...?"

"Kaiba" He offers his hand, and she shakes it, very politely. "I don't care the cost"

She nods, but he knows she disapproves of his demand. To her, all hospitals are good enough, to him none are even decent enough to touch Atem. They will have to agree to disagree.

"Regardless of the hospital, he needs to get... vaccinated, for a start. We'll run tests, we need to see his lungs. Without vaccines he could... have anything. Why didn't you call us sooner?"

Kaiba wonders the same thing.

"A doctor came earlier" Yuugi mumbles, but she only frowns.

"We have an ambulance outside, let's get him on it, shall we?"

Kaiba hadn't noticed the nurse that came with her, but suddenly they were grabbing at Atem, pulling him off the bed and into a stretcher. He looked so young and defenseless and... sick.

"Alright" The woman looked around when they were on the hallway, too much people, she surely thought. "One can come with us in the ambulance, the rest can meet us at the hospital"

Both him and Yuugi stepped forward, frowning and staring at each other with confusion. Of course Yuugi would want to go with his other half. They had shared a body, for fucks sake!

Kaiba was about to protest, to say something _-anything_ \- that proved he deserved to go with him, when Yuugi smiled. "You go, he wants you there"

A nod, nothing more and then he was following the doctor and Atem out into the cool night breeze. It felt like a slap in his face, he could only imagine how the pharaoh felt it on his burning skin. There was no certainty Atem would survive through the night. Had he gone through three thousand years inside a puzzle to die... from this?

Kaiba wouldn't let him. He simply wouldn't.

He jumped into the ambulance, sitting opposite the doctor and staring at Atem. At least he wasn't shivering.  
  
"Are you his next of kin?"   
  
The question struck him for a moment. He wasn't, what was he?   
  
"No, that would be Yuugi" What else could they be but 'related', they looked incredibly similar.  
  
"Very well" She seemed to have a constant frown, or perhaps simply didn't like him. Kaiba didn't like it when she stuck a needle on one of Atem's arms to prepare an IV.   
  
They had strapped him to the stretcher, except for his arms. He could only imagine how constrictive that must feel, after his earlier experience. The way to the hospital was quiet, only interrupted by the rustling of the woman working on Atem and checking his vitals. He seemed to be holding on, although they had put an oxygen mask on his face.

He jumped out of the ambulance when they arrived, and followed both of them inside. They weren't treating him as an emergency because he was stable, and the waiting around only made him more anxious. Kaiba didn't notice his hand was holding Atem's until he had to move away to let them do an X-ray.

He could hear bits and pieces. His blood pressure was fine, but his consciousness was less than ideal, they wanted to check the infection and had to make sure he was hydrated. Apparently, he was malnourished. Nobody liked the fact he was non-vaccinated and a couple dirty glances were thrown Kaiba's way.

"We're placing him in a room" the same doctor as before said, a chart on her arms "We're doing antibiotics, we'll keep him hydrated with an IV and there's something for the pain as well. I'll keep you updated, Mr. Kaiba but we need his next of kin. For the paperwork"

He nodded, and somehow found his voice when she was about to leave. "Is he going to be okay?"

Something seemed to soften on her face, and Kaiba braced himself for the lies and the 'we'll do our best' and what not.

"He's not in the best shape. His shivering earlier happened because bacteria found its way into his bloodstream. We caught it early, there's no sepsis yet." Yet. _Yet._ "I'll know more when we get the test results, but you should know we'll do everything we can"

A nod, what else was he going to say? There was a lot he could say, a lot on his mind but none of those things were kind and none of them led to a better treatment for Atem.

He followed them to the room, trying not to focus too much on how _white_ the hospital was. Usually, the color didn't bother him in the least. It was the color of his coat, his blue eyes, even his company had an abundance of white. But on an hospital it took a whole different meaning.

And the smell. Nauseating.

The couple nurses that were with them pulled Atem from the stretcher into the hospital bed. The brief movement allowed Kaiba to see the extent of cables on his chest, or latex connected to his arms. He understood why they were there, of course. Antibiotics, analgesics, hydration.

Understanding doesn't mean he liked it. The nurses left without a second glance, probably tired of doing the same thing over and over again. The monitor on the side beeped constantly and, to Kaiba's knowledge, the data there was correct. Atem wasn't all that bad.

Somehow seeing the oxygen mask over his lips made his stomach turn.

He pulled the one chair in the room to the side of the bed and sat there, completely powerless. His mind started thinking about what he knew, and what he could do to improve this situation. Throwing money to problems doesn't usually solve them, but if you have a mind like his own, it can create new ways.

If this body didn't work, then some other could. At least, his soul was there, so if this body died, Kaiba might be able to... to...

He placed his hand over Atem's, still warm, incredibly soft. He wasn't _holding his hand_ per se, but he was there, and he wanted the man to know he was.

Time fades and drips and scurries away in hospitals, staring at the clock was pointless so he didn't. There were other ways of counting time, Kaiba had been very creative during his long study nights -horror nights-, he could be creative now. He just had to focus on him.

The door opened, and he moved his hand away. Not that he wanted to, but he had to turn to see who it was.

"How's he?" Yuugi's eyes were red, he had been crying. Maybe that was the correct response to this situation, not the white noise he was experiencing.

"Stable. They gave him, uhm, antibiotics. She said he's not in the best state"

The smaller boy rushed to the pharaoh's side. How would he feel? Being face to face -and able to touch- someone that had lived inside of your body for so long? Yuugi grabbed at his hand with care, trying not to touch the IV on his arm, and Kaiba didn't feel jealous this time.

"We're all with you" He said. Oh, no, another friendship speech? "I know you'll find your way to-"

Kaiba got up, starting to feel sick to his stomach "I'll get you a cup of coffee"

"No, it's okay. You can st-"

"People don't get better just because you want them to, I don't want to hear the speech" He didn't mean to be harsh, but he couldn't handle it. Not right now. Or maybe not ever.

He walked out the room, trying to stretch his legs. The hallways were as deserted as one might expect, which didn't help the general aura of a hospital. There was a cafeteria on the ground floor, but that felt too far away to go, so instead he went towards the instant coffee machine near the elevators.

The quality of the coffee had never mattered much to him, as long as it did its job. Oh, if only he had had coffee while he studied. Agh, why was he thinking about that period of his life? Not that it held much weight on his heart anymore, but he would rather not bring it up.

He had no idea why he thought Yuugi was there alone, so when he heard hushed voices around the corner he gritted his teeth. Atem deserved to have his friends near, or whatever it was they were, but he didn't exactly like the crowdedness.

"Why did we let him go with him?" Jonouchi was complaining, as he always did. Moron.

"Atem wanted him there" Anzu was trying to mediate, he could tell by the tone of her voice. But there was something there as well. They didn't trust him. That was fine, of course, what had he done to be trustworthy?

"But _why_? They are enemies? Have we all forgotten what he almost did?"

"That was before" Kaiba could almost hear the 'tsk' of her tongue "I think... Kaiba seems to like him a lot"

There was a pause, longer than there should have been.

"So what? we all like him"

Oh, Jonouchi, you are so stupid.

Kaiba placed the second cup on the machine, and pressed the buttons, waiting for the coffee to _hurry up,_ although he wanted to eavesdrop. Just a little.

"Not like that, I mean _like_ like him"

The idea of Anzu having to draw a picture to Jonouchi just to explain a simple fact made him chuckle under his breath.

"Kaiba's not gay" Another pause. He didn't feel the need to explain himself, and apparently they had catch up on it. Fine. "Wait, he is? Hm, I always said he was creepy"

"Jou don't be an idiot" Alright, maybe Kaiba should send Honda a nice Christmas' present, or birthday present, or a card.

The coffee finished filling the cup, and he grabbed both of them. He only had to turn around the corner to come face to face with them, throw some words. But what for? There was no reason to defend himself, he had done nothing wrong and they could all get fucked if they thought he had.

They kept talking, and he simply walked back the way he came, pushing the door open with his shoulder. "Coffee's not great"

Yuugi smiled as warm as ever and accepted the cup, not that he wanted the coffee, but he was too polite to decline.

"He woke up for a moment, recognized me"

"That's good" Kaiba hated not being there when it happened. The coffee was sour, he should've grabbed some sugar. Hm. "Do you think...?"

"Yes?"

"Can't believe I'm asking you this" He groaned "do you think there's something... _otherworldly_ about his state?"

Yuugi looked at the pharaoh, thoughtful. "I don't know. It could just be his body's not used to our germs, you know? He was alive 3.000 years ago"

"Hm"

A big _fuck you_ from 'destiny'. Kaiba gritted his teeth and downed his coffee, trying to think of something else. Anything else.

"I'll go tell the others he's okay" Yuugi smiled, squeezing Atem's hand one more time before opening the door "Thank you for staying with him"

Kaiba just mumbled a 'yeah' and sat back down next to the bed. There was a bruise on one of Atem's arms, had he done that? Shit. Had he been holding him so strongly against the bed? But he had been shaking so...

"I'm sorry" He whispered, touching the dark spot with a finger " _Fuck,_ I'm sorry" And then he leaned forward, swallowing the lump on his throat.

The steady beeping of the machines were the only reassurance he got. With a shaky breath, he straightened his back and held his head with his hands, leaning forward just enough to place his elbows on his knees.

One by one, Atem's friends entered the room without asking permission. Not that he would have denied them the right. Some gave glances his way, but mostly they kept to their stupid speeches and reassurances that everything 'would be okay' and how strong his soul was, or whatever they were saying. Kaiba had to tone them out to endure it.

People don't get better cause you want them to, sometimes they just die and there's nothing you can do.

They didn't bother him, and he didn't bother them. So the same way they came, they left and he was left with the beeping and the quiet.

Deep into the night, when he had forgotten to keep track of visitors, or noises in the hallway, there was movement on the bed.

The beeping had been steady so far, and Kaiba made sure to keep the machines in sight even when he got up to stretch his legs.

Atem's temperature had dropped, according to one of the nurses that came to give him a couple vaccines -he didn't remember which ones, although they had told him. Another nurse, the one that came to put more analgesic on the IV, gave him a soft smile and said something about being a good 'friend' that clearly meant 'boyfriend'.

"Where am I?" Atem's voice was even deeper than usual, his lips dry and about to break. "What... happened?"

"You are in the hospital" He got up from the chair, standing next to the bed so it would be easier for the Pharaoh to look at him. Atem frowned slightly, moving his hands over the white sheets and winced "What... Why...?" He groaned, clearly frustrated, and one of his hands went straight for the IV. Was he insane?

"Stop" Kaiba grabbed his hand and moved it away, there wasn't much resistance "You are sick, this is a hospital and that's your medicine so _stay put_ "

Atem gave him a dirty look, but it didn't last. He quickly focused on their hands.

"I... I'm in my body" He sounded surprised, shocked even "... This makes no sense. Am I dreaming?"

Kaiba sat on the edge of the bed, letting go of his hand but giving him a very brief smile. "You are not dreaming"

"How did this happen? I... I was going to cross... And then I thought of my friends and you-"

"Don't fucking lie" There was a bit of anger in his voice, but he wasn't hurt "You were determined to cross over. I saw it. What did you really think?"

"No, I-... I thought of you all" He frowned "And I thought how unfair it was, to die young and not... Get a chance"

"Ah, there it is"

"Don't make me the bad guy, Kaiba. You have no idea what it's like!" There was a cough, and Atem held his side, in pain. When it passed, there was a delighted look on his face "I just felt pain... In my body. _My_ _body_ "

"You must have hit your head while coming back from the dead, Pharaoh. Pain is not something to be happy about"

Atem chuckled "Oh, shut up" He coughed again, breathing with difficulty "What's wrong with me?"

"You have pneumonia"

"Pneumonia" he deadpanned. And then he laughed, shaking and trying to cover his big smile with a hand.

"I'll tell Yuugi you lost your mind"

"Pneumonia!" He smiled at him "I'm _sick_ "

"It's not funny" Kaiba frowned, starting to get annoyed. Did he not realized how fragile he had been? Did he think of himself as invincible? He wasn't a Pharaoh anymore, or an otherworldly spirit or anything of the sort! Kaiba wanted to shake him, or slap him, or both.

"It is! I'm sick, oh..."

"Haven't you been sick these past few years? Not even once?"

"Kaiba, I've been dead the past _few_ years!" His smile was big and white and Kaiba didn't know if he wanted to slap him or kiss him, roughly.

"You could die again... So, don't."

"Excellent advice. I'll be sure to stay alive, then"

A groan "Don't mock me"

"I'm not mocking you" One of Atem's hands went to the oxygen tube trying to take it off his nostrils, but stopped when Kaiba widened his eyes. "I'm just... Happy"

There was silence after that, Kaiba not knowing what to say. So he didn't say anything, placing his hand near Atem's, staring at him. The pharaoh returned the look, his hand moving over his' and a smile creeping onto his face again.

"Help me get up" He said, and licked his lips but they remained dry.

"There's water if you want some"

Atem shook his head and pulled the covers off his body, sliding his legs of the side of the bed and staring at them in pure amazement. Kaiba got up to give him some room, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Come here, you..." There was irritation in his voice, but a fondness and playfulness he hadn't experienced from him before. Did having a body change him at all? Kaiba moved closer, letting the pharaoh hold onto one of his arms as he stepped down the bed and put his full weight on his two feet.

"You okay?" He moved the IV stand next to the man, sliding his arm around his waist to keep him steady. There was a momentary wobble, but Atem nodded again. Then a step, and another, and another. The bathroom wasn't far, and by the time they made it to the door, the pharaoh was pulling away from him and grabbing the IV stand as if he had always had a body and two working legs.

Kaiba stood outside the bathroom, giving him privacy.

"Did you know how we used to cure illnesses back then?"

_Back then_ meaning in Ancient Egypt. Seto closed his eyes and sighed softly. His brain had had more than one shocking experience in less than 48 hours, perhaps a good compromise would be to shut down his logic for a little while.

"How?"

After a few more moments, Atem opened the door and walked into the room again, barefooted and smiling. He started on how health was viewed as a state that involved both the body, mind and soul and who would conduct what and how they would fix this and that. Kaiba _wanted_ to be disinterested but it was the most interesting thing he had heard in a while. So he nodded, and asked questions that made Atem smile brighter and pull him towards the bed as he explained.

It would have been easier if the pharaoh didn't care, or if he didn't talk about that past as if he loved it with all his heart. It would have been easier to forget he might not be supposed to be there with him.

"I just... is Yuugi outside?" He asked while laying down on the bed again, pulling the covers to his body.

"He went home, to get some sleep. He'll be back in the morning"

"Kaiba, what time is it?" He frowned and searched for a clock.

"Around four am"

"No, you... you need to rest" Kaiba shrugged, and sat on the edge of the bed "Ah, shit"

"Does it still hurt?" He frowned, Atem holding one of his sides.

"I just need..." He sighed and grabbed a glass of water on one of the sides of the bed, drinking all of it in one go.

Kaiba tried not to chuckle. How much did he remember? The whole thing? Waking up in the tomb? Wrapped in all those linen strips like the mummy he was for 3,000 years?

"We defeated-"

"Yes, we did" A sigh. It wasn't a lie, even if that had been some sort of collective hallucination or the truth. "I was there"

"I remember" Atem looked at him, violet eyes vibrating "Kaiba, you saw it. Everything, home, us"

_Home._

"Don't get ahead of yourself, pharaoh. That wasn't me. I would never kneel before you"

Atem gave him a wicked grin "Oh? Never?"

He felt the tips of his ears getting red and cursed under his breath "Not without making you kneel first"

There was a pause, electric, dense. Atem swallowed and made a gesture for him to lay down next to him. He complied, there was no point in resisting. Besides, he had been sitting in a chair for hours and his back was starting to hurt.

"I feel like I'm going to wake up tomorrow and find this is all a... shadow game"

Kaiba huffed "It's not" He moved to his side, staring at his face. The pharaoh was staring at the white ceiling with something in his eyes, longing? Nostalgia? He had seen all his friends, his loved ones, his people, and now that was all gone. It was cruel, if destiny truly existed, to make him never have it all.

"So, this afterlife" He tried "it's not going anywhere, no?"

Atem blinked and stared at him, barely moving "What?"

"When you die, that's where you'll go. It doesn't matter if you cross now or in sixty years"

Atem's frown deepened "I wasn't thinking about that, but you _are_ right" Ah. Then he was worse at reading the other man than he thought he was. "I was thinking... it feels so strange having a body again. I almost don't feel like myself. I-... I _had_ a purpose"

Kaiba moved closer to him, forcing him to lay on his side as well. It was better this way, with him as the big spoon and no size difference bothering them.

"When I woke up after the mind crush..." Atem tensed, he pulled him closer "my body felt strange, I forgot to eat twice and almost passed out on my way to Duelist Kingdom. I felt like a had a purpose before, but then I was lost"

There was a pause.

"What helped you through it?"

"Mokuba" He whispered, rubbing his arm up and down "And you"

Atem sighed, there was no more giddiness, no more excitement about his new -old- body, only uncertainty.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really proud of this chapter for some reason. I was slightly stuck and then it just came pouring out. The events in Egypt (the pharaoh's memories) remain mostly the same, I will touch upon it later on, but didn't want to write basically aaaaall of it. You'll see x)
> 
> Notes:  
> -There's a mummy in the manga that's implied to be the Nameless Pharaoh. It's quite early on, and honestly it made my heart hurt when I saw it.   
> -In the manga Kaiba remains in a coma after losing against Atem and he (Atem) doing a mind crush on him.   
> -Do I like to make my characters suffer? yes, yes I do.


	9. If I stay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's rating is E- for explicit content.

The first thought that crossed Yuugi's mind when he entered the room was that there was someone spooning Atem on the hospital bed. It struck him as strange, not by the act, but how real the Pharaoh was. He had been living inside his heart for so long and now he was real, and alive. And right _there_.

The second thought he had was how mistaken he had been with his first assumption. The shape on the space -and slightly over the Pharaoh- was Kaiba's coat. Not the white flashy one he used during duels, but a black and purple one that seemed almost cozy. The man itself was staring out the window, arms crossed, his back turned to Atem's bed.

"Hey, good morning" He walked towards the bed, Atem's breathing was steady and his face seemed much more relaxed than before. Yuugi almost marveled in him, how different he looked now, how handsome his true self was. It made him so happy to have him. "You should go get some rest, Kaiba. It's seven in the morning"

The tall man nodded, turning to see both of them. "Did you talk to Mokuba?"

"Yes, he's worried like the rest of us, but he's okay. Told me to tell you to calm down"

There was a brief smile on Kaiba's face before he nodded and pulled the door open. He didn't ask for his coat.

Yuugi considered him a good friend, but it was nice to finally be alone with the Pharaoh.

Anzu had gone with him but decided to wait outside, she was giving them space and he adored her for it.

After a while, there was a shift on the Pharaoh's face and he softly opened his eyes. The moment he saw Yuugi, he lighted up, smiling. " _Aibou_ "

"Atem" It was nice, saying his name. He lunged forward, hugging him tightly and crying without any noise "I thought... When I won I-..."

"I'm so proud" Atem hugged him him just as tightly, patting him softly on the back "That duel was magnificent"

There was a dry chuckle, and then Yuugi moved away to see him. Truly see him. They had been identical for so long, now Atem had his own identity, his body, his own _face_. They were eerily alike, yes, but anyone could see the differences -apart from the skin tone.

"Are you okay?"

"Oh, I think so. The doctor came in earlier today" So she had been the one to find them cuddling together, Yuugi presumed. "She said my lungs are in rough shape, but the antibiotics seem to be working _so_ -"

"You'll pull through, we've been through worse. Haven't we?"

"Indeed we have" he nodded once, his hair shorter, he noticed. "I've forgotten" He mumbled, touching with a finger his own chest "how it's like to have a body"

"There's time to find out" Atem stared at him, determination written all over him. It was both funny and adorable how everything was some sort of challenge. A battle to be won. What was he to do now there weren't any more battles?

"I don't understand why I can't leave. I'm fine"

Yuugi wondered if this was the time to explain to him why it's important to care for your physical body, or hospital rules.

"We do have some paperwork to figure out"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, they want to know your last name"

"Oh"

"Yup! So, we'll figure it out together" He smiled, pulling out a paper sheet with blank spaces. "I thought you could have my last name. We already look alike and no one would question it. If... If you want, of course"

There was a solemn pause, the pharaoh staring at him wide eyed. Atem nodded once "It'd be an honor"

Yuugi smiled, and shrugged "It's okay, alright, date of birth?"

Atem was still moved by their previous interaction, but now had a thoughtful look on his face. "Well, I was born during the second season. Ah, a season consists of four modern day months" He smirked and then spent the following minutes explaining their ancient calendar.

Yuugi smiled at him, but stared at the blank space on the page "So, around July 26th?"

"Ah, yes" There was a slight sadness in his tone, as if he missed it. How could he not? They had been there, he had _seen_ his kingdom. It hadn't been during their best days, but it had been incredible.

He reached out, holding his hand and smiling at him. Atem gave him a surprised look, the one he always gave when Yuugi understood what was going on in his heart without having to ask.

"Thank you, _aibou_ "

"No problem... We don't have to finish this now, we can come back to it"

"No, no, it's okay. What else?"

"Place of residence?"

Atem pressed his lips together and nodded "I... I need to ask Ishizu, but I was thinking of staying here for a while. Until everything settles down"

It hurt, the thought of being apart, but it was what was best for him. They had talked about this with Ishizu, quietly while everyone else was occupied. The pharaoh would have some adjusting to do -and a lot of grieving-, it would be best if he were in his homeland.

"Do you want me to stay?"

Atem shook his head "This is something I should do on my own. You've been far from home for too long, for me. Your school, everything... Please, go back"

Yuugi nodded. Their last duel had been precisely for this, for them to learn how to be apart, to make their own paths. And even if it scared him, he knew Atem would always be there.

"Are you ever going back? Home, I mean"

Atem opened his mouth and then closed it "I don't know" He whispered, and Yuugi simply hugged him as tightly as he could. He wanted to let him know it was okay.

Or it would be.

***

He was discharged on the fourth day, and sent home with a bunch of pills, vitamins and some diet. The doctor -and some nurses- had given him strange looks, and he wasn't quite sure why. True, it had been a bit weird when they asked him about his birthday and he responded with his ancient calendar, still not used to the twelve month one. Now that his memories were back where they belonged, it proved difficult to separate his own knowledge from modern day one.

His friends had been happy to see him walking around and recovered, Jonouchi squeezed him and ruffled his hair in a way he hadn't actually experienced before. It was endearing and slightly irritating.

"It's strange, seeing both of you side by side" Honda stared at them with a thoughtful expression.

Atem had discovered several things since coming back from the dead. He liked to be close to Yuugi, it made him feel safe -he wasn't quite sure when that feeling was going to pass. He was oddly unaware of what his body needed most of the time, and it was taking some getting used to.

And being around his friends wasn't as easy as he had expected it to be. When he first manifested, and the following years, he had been a part of Yuugi, and their friends had loved him just as well. Right now he wasn't a part of someone else, but his own person, and he knew they had to form an opinion on him. Not only that, but his social skills were... Bad. It almost reminded him of his failed date with Anzu.

"We're happy to have you" Anzu smiled, she had given back the small pendant where his name was engraved. He would never take it off.

"Thank you" He had said with a brief smile, the living room a bit too crowded for his taste. The only one that wasn't there with them was Marik, who continued to care for Bakura. Atem suspected it was Ryou who was in fact taking care of Marik, and not the other way around. There was a great deal of guilt in Marik, and he could only think of one person -maybe two- to help him go through it.

"Can't wait to see everyone's faces" Jonouchi smirked "There will be conspiracy theories about you two"

Atem chuckled, eyeing Kaiba in one corner of the room. He was, as always, away from the rest, trying to look as if he didn't care enough. He had changed since Battle City, and he could see the effort he now put in his interactions with other people. Gods, he didn't even insult Jonouchi as much as he used to.

"I'm not... Coming back right now"

There had been silence, and surprise. Kaiba was the only one who already knew, even if they hadn't spoken about it. It didn't surprise him at all. Their bond was much stronger now, even without the millennium items. He had so many questions, about what they had seen. What if Kaiba got all of his memories back? It was difficult to understand how Kaiba and Priest Seto could be the same soul but different people at the same time. Atem had seen his priest in the afterlife, welcoming him, and even though he knew they were made from the same source, he couldn't help but feel they weren't the same.

That didn't change his curiosity, his desire to know what had happened after his death. He had cared for his priest, once. Not in the way Kaiba imagined, but they had been, in the end, true friends.

During his time in the hospital, they hadn't been able to talk or do anything. The second day there, Kaiba hadn't even gone to see him. Atem wondered if he had fallen prey to exhaustion or if he was working. Mokuba went to see him, though he didn't mention his brother and Atem didn't ask. The rest of their friends visited and Yuugi stayed during that second night. The third day, which got Atem completely bored, was full of nurses and doctors and people asking him things.

Kaiba had appeared then, during the night like a shadow, and stayed on the bed with him. He had been discharged in the morning. Atem wondered why they didn't speak more that night. Perhaps because neither knew what to do when you are cuddling in bed. And even though he was aching for more, he had had nothing for 3000 years, to even have a simple hug was... Intoxicating.

And now here they were, with their friends and not as alone as Atem wanted.

"What do you mean?" Jonouchi asked, and Atem could see Kaiba's mouth opening, he expected a snarky retort or something. Instead, there was a quiet "Let him finish"

Yuugi was so pleased with that it almost made him smile as well.

"I'm staying here for a while. You all went  through great trouble to get me here, for my memories... And my destiny, I can't thank you enough. But right now I need to stay home"

Honda nodded, sympathetically and he was almost sure he could see some tears in Jonouchi's eyes. "It's not goodbye forever"

Anzu hugged him, and it was a bit of a shock. After a few awkward seconds he hugged back. "This is your home, we understand..."

"We just got you back" Jonouchi hugged both of them, and now it was truly uncomfortable. Atem gave a shy smile, trying to find the words to explain himself without getting overwhelmed by their closeness. "but we'll be waiting for you back home, 'kay?"

Home. What was his home?

Anzu disentangled herself from the hug first -the only ones not actually participating were Kaiba and Ishizu- and smiled at him. She was warm, and as nice as anyone could be, he hoped Yuugi would find what he needed with her.

"How about we order some pizza an play some games?"

"Duel monsters?" Both Jonouchi and Kaiba seemed to perk up at that, although Kaiba was the only one trying to hide his interest.

" _No_ " Anzu was frowning "Board games, like old times!" There was a collective groan, but they were all on board.

She pulled Yuugi away from him, which unnerved him a little, and proceeded to phone the pizza place. This, in turn, made Ishizu run at them to try and _actually communicate_ with the man on the other side.

Kaiba was staring at him from across the room. He made him a small gesture, and they both left the living room and the house.

The Ishtar's backyard wasn't big, there was a high fence around it to separate them, a remnant of their life underground. The house was in the city, surrounded by noise and lights and people. Somehow Atem couldn't imagine Marik living in an isolated place, not after what he had gone through.

Kaiba stood with his arms crossed, staring at him. There was no coat on him, only a high neck shirt and trousers. There was no way in hell he wasn't dying from the heat with those clothes.

"I'm staying" The words seemed different now, heavier. Kaiba didn't move much, only tilting his head to look at him a bit better "I don't know for how long"

"Yes"

Yes? What did that mean? Atem swallowed, he gave two steps forward, closing the distance between them until their feet almost touched. He looked up -he _always_ had to look up with him- and found those blue eyes. He was going to miss them. It didn't matter how or when, they always seemed to find each other, and now he was actively parting ways. Lost at sea.

"I expected you to be..."

"Angry?" Kaiba scoffed. Atem gritted his teeth.

"Disappointed"

"Ah" He was enjoying this, which in turn, made him angry.

"We haven't even talked about... Whatever it was that had you angry at me. Let me tell you, _again,_ it wasn't what you thought"

"I know" Silence, a long pause. The sun was setting behind them, somewhere. Was it that late already? Memories of him and Mana running around, sand hitting his ankles, the sunset... He felt a wave of pain squeeze at his chest. "I'm staying too"

"You are?" Atem gave a step back... or tried to, because Kaiba's hand found its way to his lower back, keeping him exactly where he was. His hand was warm, he could feel it even through his shirt and it was doing things to his body he had forgotten a human being could experience.

"I have capable people working on Kaiba Land, I just have to... oversee it from here" His eyes went a bit down, and he swallowed "They know better than to fuck up"

If there was anything he wanted to say, it left his mind. He raised his hands to Kaiba's shirt collar and pulled him down, finally meeting his lips with his own. He was warm, and his lips were thinner than they looked, but the kiss was everything he had ever imagined.

His mind raced with fragments of their battle city duel, the exhilaration, fear, the pure _adrenaline_ running through his body was nothing compared to what he felt then. He placed his hands behind his neck, feeling his short soft hairs, and his hot skin. He wanted to kiss all of it.

Kaiba kissed exactly as you would expect him to: as if his life depended on it. He had his hands firmly placed on his hips, pulling him forward even if their bodies couldn't possibly be closer. His teeth pulled at his lips, and even when the kisses became shorter he never stopped. If they were somewhere else, anywhere else, Atem would probably push him against a wall. But they were in someone else's house, and their friends were inside.

The soft touch of their tongues made his brain stop working, and the only thing he could think was of getting _more_ and _more of him._ Seto seemed to feel the same way, because a soft noise escaped him -they'd probably never mention it, but Atem loved the little sound.

Atem didn't remember how it felt to be kissed. He knew he had done it before, more than once -3000 years ago- but he couldn't remember the feeling of lips over his own. Or the way his blood had run, or if his heartbeat had gone as fast as it was now.

He moved his arms a bit further behind Seto's neck, pulling him closer. In return, he felt the man's arms pull him tighter against him, making Atem stand on the tip of his toes. He was sure Kaiba enjoyed the height difference, a little victory?

"We don't have to go back inside" Kaiba mumbled against his shoulder as they hugged each other.

"Don't you want to try and win some games?"

There was a groan, and Atem laughed wholeheartedly. Ever since getting his body back he had been trying to understand _how_ it had happened and what his purpose was. It didn't matter then, he felt invigorated and filled with energy. Almost exactly how he felt after dueling Kaiba.

"Come on, it's just for a little while"

Kaiba groaned again, but there was a harmless feel to it, as if he were smiling. Was he?

"Fine" He pulled back, and Atem saw he had clearly rumpled his brown hair, and made his lips swell. He wanted to do it again. "Let's go"

The air was much cooler the moment they stepped inside, Atem liked the outside weather, the heat on his skin reminded him of long afternoons playing and running around the palace halls as if he owned the world. The kissing had left no time to discuss the elephant in the room, staying in Egypt might push back Kaiba's plans and he didn't want to hold him back.

All of their friends were sitting on the living room floor now, around a coffee table. They had placed cushions to sit on top of and there was laughter all around. The pizza hadn't arrived.

"Uh, guys, we didn't know if you wanted anything special so we just got cheese pizza" Anzu smiled at them.

"Yeah, they didn't have anything _gourmet_ for you, Kaiba"

Atem barely glanced at the man next to him, unsure if he was going to snap at Jonouchi or not. If Kaiba was annoyed, he didn't show it on his face.

"I'll have to make do with whatever trash you eat, then"

"Hey!"

There were chuckles from the rest, and Honda elbowed him as both Atem and Kaiba sat on the floor completing the circle. Mokuba was there as well, talking to Yuugi intensely about something they couldn't hear.

"It's good to see you are awake" Atem said, staring straight at Ryou. He had been in rough shape since the past events and hadn't left his assigned bedroom much. The Pharaoh had asked everyone about him while he was in the hospital, and even though they had told him Bakura was doing better, it was nice seeing it.

Ryou smiled warmly at him, shrugging although his eyes seemed a bit red. "It's all fine.. Marik kept me company"

He nodded, wondering if any of them missed the spirit of the millennium ring. Atem couldn't understand how the spirit had dared hurt Ryou so many times, he could never hurt Yuugi even if he wanted to. It was unforgivable, to be so cruel to your host. But... That didn't change the fact that perhaps Ryou missed him. Had they talked to each other? Known each other? Ryou had always talked about the spirit as a separate entity, something unknown but he had always gone back to the ring. Over and over, even when they kept it from him.

Atem glanced at Yuugi, who was now trying not to blush too much as Jonouchi and Honda teased him, would he had been crushed if he left? Atem had taught him how to be strong -or maybe it was the other way around-, to stand on his own, but he couldn't even imagine that first night apart.

As he walked towards the Afterlife, he couldn't look back, he knew if he did he wouldn't be able to do what he was supposed to. His eyes had filled with tears even though the sight of his long lost friends waiting for him filled him with joy. And then he walked the first steps, eyes closed, and a single thought crept into his mind... The next thing he remembered was suffocating, pain on his joints and the voices around him. Then Kaiba. Things were a blur after that.

Did Ryou wondered if Bakura had a body of his own? Did it hurt to see him there? Atem could see no hard feelings on the young boy's face, but there was sadness.

They shared pleasantries for a little while, unsure as to how to proceed now that he had to be present for _whole_ conversations, until Marik stole Ryou's attention. They seemed to be getting along, despite their... Past. Well, no one there had a perfect record. He was hardly a Saint.

"Hm, where are those games?" Anzu got up and searched through the living room. Ishizu and Rishid kept the house extremely organized, but sadly enough she couldn't find anything. Marik gave a brief "we never had any games growing up" and, Atem wasn't sure but he thought he saw Ryou squeeze his hand.

"Truth or dare?" Honda offered "It's a classic"

"No way, with Jonouchi and Kaiba here we might end up in jail or _dead_ " Yuugi spoke, amused.

"Burying bodies _can_ be fun"

Atem chuckled, which in turn got him an almost happy glance from Kaiba. Comments like those were the ones that made Jonouchi distrust him, they would have to find a way to be around each other.

"Never have I ever?" Anzu sat back down, with a stack of paper cups in one hand.

"Not with Mokuba present"

Mokuba arched an eyebrow, defiantly. "Why not? I'm not a kid!"

"You are" Kaiba was using his tired voice, as if it were boring to have this discussion. "And I don't want you being scarred by these people"

"I'm not a kid. And I don't care what you say, I _know_ your _browsing_ history"

There were muffled chuckles, and Kaiba was staring at Mokuba like only a brother could. Atem gave them fond glances.

"Mokuba" Kaiba spoke calmly "I'll tell them what happened in _Paris_ "

There was a gasp from Mokuba "You wouldn't dare"

"Try me"

" _Fine_ " The youngest Kaiba got up from his spot and gave them all a serious look "Send some pizza to my room. And please make my brother lose"

Jonouchi laughed "Will do my best, little guy"

Atem had no siblings, and his relationship with Yuugi was nothing like what Kaiba and his brother had, so he had understood half of what had happened there. Apparently, both had _blackmail_ material on the other. It was adorable.

"Goodnight, Mokuba"

"I hate you!" His tone said the opposite, although he did slam the door on his way out.

The man next to him was relaxed, as if this was a scene that repeated itself, or variations of it. Jonouchi had a little smile on his face as he passed around the paper cups, was he thinking of Shizuka? The relationship he had with his sister was comparable to the Kaiba's, despite being separated for way too long. Did Seto see that? Atem wasn't delusional, Jonouchi and Kaiba were on speaking terms _now_ and it might take years for them to truly like the other.

"What do you have on an eleven year old that's worse than your browsing history?" Yuugi seemed truly curious, although he was blushing a bit. Was he thinking about Kaiba's browsing history? Whatever that was. Atem had had Yuugi's knowledge while they shared bodies, but there were some facts he had... Forgotten. Or simply didn't pay much attention to. Kaiba's technology was slightly above his comprehension, even if the math behind it was quite simple.

"I wouldn't say it's worse, he's just very private"

It was nice seeing them talk like this. He could imagine a world without him, a world where he had crossed over to the Afterlife. In that world, Yuugi and Kaiba would become good friends -they already were. Who would phone who first? Kaiba, definitely. Under some silly excuse, a duel perhaps. Or a game prototype in need of testing, or he would send Mokuba to do the inviting. And Yuugi, being as good as he is, would be a good friend. They would have been okay without him. That world existed, somewhere, somehow. Had he done the wrong thing by staying?

"Atem?" Yuugi was staring at him, his smile slowly fading "Everything okay?"

"Hm? Yes. Why?"

There was silence, and a couple coughs.

"We asked if you know how to play the game?"

Oh. _Oh_. Right. He had a body now, and they could see him and hear him and _yeah_.

"Never have I ever? I think so. There's no alcohol, though"

Marik snorted "Of course there's alcohol, what are we? Nuns?" and then he pulled a bottle of vodka from a little cabinet on the wall, passing it around.

Kaiba stared at his vodka filled cup with distaste, moving it slowly in his hand. He had never seen him drink before.

Atem passed, given he was still on antibiotics and had just been discharged from the hospital. He wanted nothing to do with that horrid place. The memories he had of being sick were much different, there were no lonely hospitals in Ancient Egypt. He hadn't been a sickly child, but once he got so ill even his father worried -he had always been so calm around him. Atem remembered resting on his bed, having his priests over as well as healers to care for his body and soul. Modern day hospitals lacked all concept of spirituality.

"Alright, who starts?"

"How about you, Anzu?" Ryou smiled, he had refused to drink any alcohol and no one tried to force him.

She nodded, thoughtful. This was a tough crowd, Atem realized, but the atmosphere was relaxed enough -for now.

"Never have I ever... Done drugs!"

Atem, Marik and Honda drank at the same time, which got them some quiet gasps. He was used to playing games where someone wins, and someone loses, this was not one of those games. This was something one might do amongst friends, to know one another. Yes, the one that ended up puking would surely be the loser but no one would even care. Why had Kaiba agreed to this?

"Alright, alright, wait up, how come you had time to do drugs while living inside Yuugi?"

Atem gave his partner a glance "I didn't do such thing while he was my... Host" He shook his head and stared back at Jonouchi "It happened _before_. I'm not sure it was as taboo as it is now. And it was nothing like the things you have today. Some of it was ceremonial..."

"Yeah, right, ceremonial" Marik joked "Mine was _ceremonial_ as well, I assure you"

Atem smirked but didn't elaborate further. How could he explain what if felt to drink blue lotus' tea? The calmness, the easiness, and sometimes the arousal it brought? Some restless nights it had been the only thing giving him a blissful sleep. He had tried other herbs during ceremonies for the Gods, but he had never abused such things.

"Alright, I'll go next" Marik straightened his back, he seemed excited. It probably was the first time he had friends over like this. Or perhaps it wasn't. Atem didn't know. Should he ask? Yuugi would know what to do, he was always great during social interactions. "Never have I ever... Hm, _I've done a lot of bad things_ " He mused, deciding what to go for. "Alright, never have I ever had a wet dream about a duel monsters' monster"

Surprisingly enough, only Jonouchi drank from his cup, completely red from his neck to his hairline. Atem laughed, as did everyone else. He had imagined Kaiba would have to drink to that, but perhaps his bond with Blue Eyes was more pure than he gave it credit. Atem glanced at the man, who was trying his best not to mock Jonouchi.

"Let's be real here" Honda said, using a hand to mark every word "we all thought Kaiba was going to be the one with the weird fetish"

"So sorry to disappoint"

Both Anzu and Yuugi were blushing, and trying very hard not to look at their blond friend in the eyes.

"Jou, _why_?" Marik was laughing so hard his question came up strained, his eyes shining with happy tears.

"I dunno! It was _one_ time, okay"

"Let me guess" Kaiba dragged the words, enjoying himself " _Harpie lady_?"

Jonouchi stared back at him, a bit stunned which meant he had gotten it right. And, oh, poor Jou. He chuckled trying not to embarrass his friend any further, but it was hilarious.

Even Yuugi was laughing wholeheartedly now, shaking his head. Jou was lucky Mai wasn't there with them, or she would've slapped him behind the head.

"They are too realistic! You make them way too..." He pointed a finger at Kaiba, wanting to blame them. " _suggestive_ "

"Pegasus drew the cards, if you want to complain to him, be my guest"

Their laughter was dying down, but there were still smiles on everyone's faces.

"Fine, fine! I'm sure you all have worse things, and I'm about to find them all out" Jou stared at all of them one by one and finally set his gaze on Kaiba, "Never have I ever killed a guy"

There was an uncomfortable silence that set over the group immediately. Marik was looking down at his cup, his jaw clenched tight. Even though Atem knew his friend hadn't meant to hurt anyone, he had. He knew the reason behind that question, Jonouchi wasn't over Death-T, and wanted Kaiba to admit he was a 'bad person' or something of the sort.

Instead, the only ones who drank were Marik and him. Kaiba didn't raise the cup to his lips, but he was tense and staring straight at the blond man.

The moment Marik drank, Jonouchi's face fell "Sorry, man. There's... No hard feelings... I wasn't thinking..."

"It's alright" Marik wiped some vodka from his lips with his hand, and shrugged off Ryous' hand from his shoulder. "I'm making my peace with it"

Atem couldn't focus much on him because Anzu was staring at him, there was a question in her eyes. _You've killed people?_

He wanted to say they were bad people, they deserved it, but he knew that even if that was true, he was no one to pass judgment. The worst part was... He had _liked_ being judge, jury and executioner. And he wouldn't have changed if it weren't for Yuugi and his friends. That being said, they might not have become such good friends if he hadn't been the way that he had, once.

"That was a lame attempt at getting me to drink, Katsuya"

Atem was grateful, with that simple phrasing Kaiba had managed to be the center of attention and help him avoid explaining why and who he had or hadn't killed.

"I'll get you, just you wait, creep"

"Jonouchi!" Anzu elbowed him and he growled. "Atem, why don't you go next?"

"Oh, I..." He moved the cup on his hand, he could use being a 3000 year old spirit to make them all drink. But this was more a game of trust than a game of skill and he was equally curious about his friends' experiences. Truth be told, Kaiba being there and agreeing to shed some light into his air tight life was enough to spike his interest. This was still a game, one where to win something you have to share something first. In this case, some part of your life, a secret, a guilty pleasure, a regret.

He cleared his throat "Never have I ever... Had sex with a man"

Kaiba groaned next to him, "Quite _specific_ there, Pharaoh" he hissed at him, but didn't drink. The only one who did was Marik, he then shrugged and winked at Jonouchi who seemed about to have his head explode.

"But you never...! Was it the other you? It was the other you, wasn't it?"

Marik rolled his eyes at him "No, Jou, _I'm_ gay. I'm not sure my other side even liked human _beings_ "

Anzu shuddered, and Yuugi moved a bit closer to her, placing his hand on her back for a moment.

"Alright yeah, your dark side was as creepy as Kaiba" It was truly a miracle how Kaiba wasn't lashing out as much as he could've. "He's gay too, you know"

Marik stared at Kaiba with disinterest and shrugged "I don't really care, no offense, Kaiba"

"I don't care much either" He was as relaxed as Atem had ever seen him, which was strange considering how Kaiba had acted the first time he told him he liked men. Jonouchi was still trying to wrap his head around all of this, and that seemed to be what had Kaiba so amused. " _But_ that was quite a specific question, Atem"

Oh, fuck. Had he caught on his little game? He had been too forward with that question, he had tried to know too much too soon. Atem shrugged trying to play it off as if it was nothing.

"Well, it's something I haven't done and that's all fair game, isn't it?"

Kaiba stared him down, a gleam in his eyes "Yes, it is" There was something more he wanted to say, but was holding it back. For when they were alone? He couldn't wait.

"Alright, alright, since we're not following our seating order, I think Ryou should go next"

"Me?" Ryou pursed his lips and tapped the side of his cup. "Never have I ever... bragged about something I haven't done"

Jonouchi pointed at Kaiba almost immediately "Drink up, right now"

"Excuse me?"

"You are always bragging how you're going to defeat Yuugi and it hasn't happened yet _so_ "

Kaiba groaned but drank, scrunching his nose in distaste at the liquid. Some of their friends laughed, but they were cautious. It was Kaiba's turn next, but before he could say a word, the door bell rang and the mood in the room shifted from playful to hungry.

They set the food on the coffee table, passing around plates in case anyone needed one. This was the first piece of real food he was going to taste -hospital food didn't count, that had been hideous. The pizza was rich in flavor and his stomach growled.

Yuugi had been the one that took care of the body they had shared, he was the one who ate, bathed, slept, all while Atem was somewhere inside his mind, letting time pass.

Time was different now as well, it didn't pass as quickly and he was extremely aware of it. And while every second mattered, he wasn't sure what to do with all that time. It felt too much and not enough all at once.

If someone asked him, he had an idea of what he wanted to do that night, at least.

He found himself laughing and having conversations with his friends while they devoured the pizza. Mahaad came to mind. Mana. It hurt to remember them now, and he felt such guilt at forgetting them in the first place.

"I'm off to bed" Anzu yawned, stretching and smiling at them although her eyes lingered on Yuugi for a bit "Good night, everyone"

There were several 'good night's' and Atem saw movement from the corner of his eye. Kaiba was standing up next to him. "As much as I'd like to hear your embarrassing stories" he said "I have work to do"

Atem raised an eyebrow, that seemed like a lie. He hadn't brought anything -although this was Kaiba and perhaps he had some built in computer in his coat, or something-, he gave him a small glance before walking away towards the bedroom.

Signal or not, Atem decided to follow, his heart on his throat. He said he was tired -a lie- and excused himself.

**

There were no noises coming from the rest of the house as he stepped inside the room. Atem didn't bother turning on the lights, the moonshine that poured through the window was more than enough. He could see Kaiba's frame, he was facing the bed and the pharaoh couldn't see his face from where he stood.

Carefully, he closed the door behind him and walked towards the man.

Kaiba turned to face him, an expression he hadn't seen before. They were entering new territory, and all their talk seemed to be happening in silence.

Atem stepped forward, touching Seto's arm very softly, staring into his blue eyes. And then Kaiba kissed him, just like he did in the backyard. Hard, possessive. Unique.

His whole skin was burning and there was no reason to hide it. Atem pushed him away just for a moment, taking off his shirt.

Kaiba's blue eyes were darkened by lust, staring at his body as if he had never seen the world at all. He remembered a similar look, his ecstasy right when he thought he was going to win their duel. Another man might have taken a moment to touch with his fingertips, to slowly caress his exposed skin, to explore. Not Kaiba. He touched him, one eager hand hard on his skin before taking him in a kiss again, fingers running hard, leaving invisible trails.

Atem hissed, feeling the necklace on his neck snap. He pulled away from the kiss just in time to see Kaiba throwing the engraving with his name. Jealousy?

" _Kaiba_ "

"I'll get you a better one" Was all the answer he gave him, before kissing him again.

Atem quickly forgot about it, and grabbed the hem of Kaiba's shirt, pulling it upwards until the _ridiculously tall_ man broke the kiss to help him get it off. The sight was... Somehow he hadn't imagined Seto's body having so much muscle. He leaned forward, not even taking a moment either, kissing the exposed skin. Ivory white, he wanted to turn it red.

Kaiba made a strangled noise, somehow sounding unlike himself, it didn't matter. Atem hugged him, running kisses everywhere he was able to. His mouth found a pink nipple and he gave a soft kiss, making sure his tongue circled the sensitive skin, taking it between his teeth and pulling very softly afterwards. Seto's breathing had fastened, his fingers digging into his waist as if his life depended on it.

They were both hard already, pressing against the other, the most minimal friction making them gasp. Atem raised his hands to his neck, to pull him down for a kiss that was sloppy and needy. When he bit down on his lips, Kaiba moaned and took it as a challenge to kiss him even harder.

Kaiba moved his hands again, now that his chest wasn't being devoured and quickly unfastened Atem's belt, pulling it away with such strength it made the Pharaoh shiver.

Seto kissed downwards, ravishing his neck, his hand finding its way inside Atem's pants. He hadn't expected so much contact so soon, and it was almost too much. He moaned when those long, slender fingers grabbed his cock, stroking him. His knees almost gave out, he grabbed at Kaiba's arms to steady himself. The man just pulled him a bit closer.

The sensations were overwhelming after not being touched for 3,000 years. Atem hoped he wouldn't just come from _foreplay_ , he wanted it to last almost as much as he wanted to give Kaiba as much pleasure as he could. When Seto stopped kissing his neck, he immediately wanted to pull him back down. It had felt like heaven and he wanted more of it. But then Seto did something with his hand and he moaned again, hot breathes leaving his lips and crashing against the taller man's shoulder.

Atem wanted to know if this was how he touched himself when he was alone, if he thought of him while doing it -he wanted to know so much but everything that came out of him were strangled moans.

In a moment of clarity, he used his hands to open Kaiba's pants, giving him a look. He needed to know if this was okay, the other man had never been a fan of touching. There was a small nod, and he kissed him, his hand sliding under the waistband of his boxers. It was warm, he noticed, and hard. Atem wondered if he had forgotten how to do this, he didn't remember how he used to do it on himself and he had never gotten the chance to sleep with a man before. He gave a tentative stroke, hoping for muscle memory and heard Kaiba's labored breath.

They were kissing again, hard, their hands moving in each other's pants like a couple teenagers. And maybe that's what they were.

Kaiba walked towards the bed, forcing him to step backwards and try not to fall. The back of his legs hit the mattress and he sat on the bed as to not fall backwards. Kaiba loomed over him for a moment, the sight pure power. And then he did something he hadn't expected quite _yet._

"I knew you'd kneel for me" Atem whispered, placing a hand on Seto's brown hair, staring down into his eyes.

The man blushed, it was barely perceptive with the lighting but Atem could tell, and it made him tightened the grip on his hair.

Kaiba stared up at him, lips parted and hands pulling down at his pants until he got them out of the way. Atem stroked his hair, moving his hand to the side of his face until his thumb reached his lips.

"Cat got your tongue?"

Even on his knees, Kaiba didn't look like someone who had given up control. Atem wanted to change that.

Seto didn't answer, pulling his underwear all the way down and using a hand to stroke him just as before. Atem controlled his breathing as much as he could, but let it all out the moment Seto kissed his cock. He wanted to curse and push him down on him, but he did quite the opposite. With a strong grip on his hair, he pulled him away just enough to see his face.

"Answer when I talk to you"

" _Fuck_ " Kaiba closed his eyes, lips parted and hair tightly held in one of Atem's hands. "Just _let_ me..."

"You know how to?"

Seto scoffed "Yes"

"Good boy" He stroked his hair, and Kaiba took him in his mouth again. This time he was _dedicated_ , blowing him in a way that would make him come if he didn't stop him soon enough.

Atem placed his free hand on the bedding, tilting his head back and focusing his breathing. He had had this done to him before, way back when he owned the world. Right now it felt like the world owned him.

Kaiba's fingers were digging at his sides, pulling him closer as his head moved up and down in a perfect rhythm. He was _skilled_ , although Atem wouldn't be surprised if this was his first time doing it.

He felt his muscles tense, his mind going blank and his hand tightened on Kaiba's hair, the sensations too much to handle after so many years. "Alright, wait, I'm..." He tried to warn him, but Kaiba wasn't listening to him.

Atem felt long slender fingers circling the base of his cock, as Kaiba's mouth worked the rest. It was more than enough to send him over the edge, he came with a low moan, head thrown back, hand pulling at his hair. If it hurt, Kaiba didn't complain.

It took him more than a few moments to steady himself, and look down at the man that was cleaning his lips with the back of his hand. He looked feral, staring at him as if he wanted more.

And Atem wanted to give more. So much more.

"Get on the bed" He held himself upright with his elbows, reeling from his orgasm. It would take him a few minutes to try and get hard again -if he was lucky, would his body work after so long?. Kaiba moved towards him, and Atem caught him in a kiss, hands going to his slender face. He wanted to ask if he was alright, but the sharp bite the CEO gave him told him enough.

Kaiba found his place on the bed, right in the middle of it and gave him a smug smile.

Atem moved towards him, kissing his neck and running his hands on his sides, pulling at his pants to take them off. Even after being at the hospital, he was strong enough to pull them off in two quick movements. Gods, Kaiba's legs were extremely long. He had never wanted to kiss them so much.

Seto pulled him back down on him, kissing him hard as his fingers found new places to touch and explore. It was so good, being touched like this. Every time _he_ touched Kaiba, he could feel a small shudder or his breathing hitch.

It couldn't be fun doing all of that and getting nothing in return, so Atem did something he had wanted to do since they took off their clothes, he pressed his hand to Kaiba's crotch, feeling him. He rubbed gently once, and then harder, hearing the other man pant, eyes closed. Why hadn't he touched himself while sucking him off? Did he enjoy it? Did depriving himself of pleasure got him off? Atem used his teeth to pull at a patch of skin on his chest, taking his underwear off.

He could feel blood starting to pump on his body again, his mind filling itself with what he wanted to do to him. Hm, so his body _did_ work like it used to. Atem almost wanted to brag, almost.

After stroking him a few more times, he pulled back, his eyes scanning the room. Oh, no. They hadn't _planned_ this, exactly.

"I don't have any condoms or..."

"Try the night table?" Kaiba pressed his elbows against the mattress and propped himself up a bit. He nodded pulling the drawer open and sighing in relief. There was clutter inside the drawer, but he found a couple condoms and a small bottle of lube. He would buy a new one in the morning, better not to think who this belonged to.

He moved over Kaiba again, kissing him on the lips and finding a place between his legs. They were so _long_ , it was driving him insane. Kaiba's hands were touching him, running through his body as they found a comfortable enough position. Atem didn't want to hurt him.

The lube was cold on his fingers but he imagined Seto would appreciate the sensations. This was their first time together but he had learned a lot about him and the things he liked. He leaned in biting one of his nipples before pressing the tip of a finger between his thighs. He steadied himself with a hand on the bed, pushing the finger inside. Kaiba hissed, one of his hands clutching the sheets.

"You are doing great" He moved his finger, paying close attention to the other man's breathing to be sure he wasn't in too much pain. Kaiba half-groaned as a response, sweat sticking his hair to his forehead. He was beautiful like this, and Atem wanted to undo him completely.

He placed a bit more lube on his middle finger and pushed it inside as well. Kaiba had thrown an arm over his eyes and his chest moved rapidly. Atem pulled the arm away from his face, holding it tightly so he wouldn't cover himself again. His blue eyes were wild, and there was a soft blush on his cheeks that could very well be from arousal.

He wanted to see everything. "Don't" Atem said when he let go of his arm, moving his fingers in slow motions. It was proving difficult not to hurry.

Kaiba closed his eyes, a small frown on his face as he tried to steady his breathing.

" _Fuck_ " It wasn't loud enough, but he could hear it.

"What a dirty mouth you got"

"Ah, _fu_ -" He covered his mouth, drowning a moan there. He quickly pulled his hand away, though, and Atem felt even more impatient to take him. "Just... I'm fine"

Kaiba focused his attention on him, panting a bit louder. Atem felt torn, he wanted to be inside him immediately, and he also wanted to be careful and take his time.

"Do it, I'm _fine_ , for fucks sake!"

He smirked "Eager, are we?"

There was a muffled sound that he could almost identify as _'gods'_ and he felt quite good. Driving him crazy just with his fingers was something he wouldn't forget, but getting these reactions with some dirty talk was... Even better.

"Don't worry, we'll get there" He slipped another finger and Kaiba grimaced. It was expected, so he went back to a slow rhythm. "Breathe"

Kaiba was a controlling man, in his work, in his personal life, with his loved ones. It was quite clear he allowed himself to let loose in duels and in bed. He leaned in, biting hard over the skin on his shoulder, getting a moan in response. His teeth were marked on Kaiba's skin, reddened indentations that stood out against his paleness.

" _Atem_ "

He pulled the fingers out, taking one of the condoms and sliding it on his cock as quickly as he could. Modern day sex was _all new_ to him, but he wasn't ignorant and he definitely wasn't a prude. Thankfully, he lacked all the shame and guilt associated with sex from these modern times. There were no such things when he had been a prince. Even the Gods had sex, part of the process of creation. To top it all off, he had been the prince and then the pharaoh, there was a lot that was allowed to him.

He pulled Kaiba close by his neck, kissing him as they found a good position. Kaiba's legs wrapped around his waist as he fumbled trying to help himself with his hand. He steadied himself before pushing, pressing the head of his cock until Kaiba relaxed enough for it to slip inside. The tightness made him suck in a breath and clutch his hand to the headboard so hard his knuckles went white. Kaiba's head was pressed tightly over the pillows, a hand fisted on it as he tried to relax.

He got himself all the way in, closing his eyes to calm down. This was too much stimulation all at once. He'd make sure Seto ended so spent he wouldn't be able to think one cohesive thought.

He slowly moved back and then forward, making Seto pull at the covers and grit his teeth.

"If it's too much, I'll..."

"Just _move_ " He spoke through gritted teeth, pulling him down for a kiss as his legs tightened around his waist.

Atem pressed an open palm to the headboard, allowing himself a slow but steady rhythm, pulling his cock almost entirely out and then pushing inside of him again. Kaiba's breathing was shallow and it hitched more often than not, one of his hands on the Pharaoh's side, barely touching the skin there. He could tell there was some pain, but Kaiba wouldn't let him stop.

Atem pressed a hand against Kaiba's thigh anchoring himself to reality, the pleasure running through his body clouding every other thought or experience he had ever had. There was nothing like this. Nothing would ever be as good as this. As Kaiba started to moan again, and his rhythm became faster, Atem didn't think about the afterlife at all. For the first time since knowing who he was, he felt home.

"Can I...?" He could barely speak, the hand on the headboard pressed as tightly as he could. Kaiba stared at him, his eyes unfocused, hair rumpled, lips swollen...

"Fuck yes, _harder_ "

Atem let go of the headboard, grabbing at the man's waist to steady himself. Seto was staring at him, devouring his every move just with his eyes. Doing this with him was better than any duel, any drug. His fingers pressed against his white skin as he pushed much harder, the first two times making sure Kaiba wasn't in any pain. With the way his head shot back and the muscles of his abdomen tensed he could tell he was enjoying it. Atem stopped holding back, slamming into him as hard as he could with no intention of stopping until they both came.

Kaiba had started to moan over and over again, his eyes closed, hands tight on the covers.

There were scars on Kaiba's body. He had noticed them before, but the sight of him on his knees had been enough to distract him. He could see them better now, as he shivered and moved his head from one side to the other. There were two badly healed scars around the base of his neck, it didn't make him any less beautiful but Atem worried how they got there. He would make him forget about it, all of it. He felt compelled to make him forget everything but pleasure.

He leaned forward again, when his movements became faster and erratic, using a hand to stroke Seto and help him finish with him. The man underneath him was thoroughly undone, which in turn made Atem come with a low groan, his arms incapable of keeping him upright. He pressed a kiss to Seto's shoulder, getting a soft stroke on his side as a response, before pulling out from inside him and taking off the condom.

Atem found some strength left in him to get up and throw away the latex thing. He pulled open the drawer again, rummaging through it and handed paper tissues to Kaiba, who was trying to calm his breathing. The man cleaned himself and sat upright. Atem could see the extent of what he had done to him, Seto had several marks on his pale skin, some of them from his teeth, his lips were reddened and his hair a complete mess. It made him a bit proud, and worried.

"Hey..." He touched Kaiba's arm, sitting back on the bed next to him "everything okay?"

"Yes" He lay down again, pulling at the covers and sliding under them "Are you...?" Kaiba asked as his eyes wandered over him. It was then that Atem realized the state of his _own_ body. There were scratches, mostly on his side and shoulders, and he was half sure he would have marks on his neck. Hells, he was lucky his skin was dark enough to hide any bruising.

He chuckled, leaning back against the pillows, their arms brushing.

"I'm great. It was... You were.. Fantastic"

Kaiba chuckled and gave him a one shoulder shrug "You were okay"

" _Excuse me?"_

His blue eyes stared at him, and Atem could see how amused he was. Happy, even.

"Do you disagree with my assessment?"

"Yes, most definitely" Atem moved closer, half on top of him, stealing a short kiss " _I_ was excellent"

"Do you have any evidence of that?" there was a small smile on his face. Atem had never seen him like this.

"Hm, perhaps we _should_ run more tests" Atem kissed him again, slow "To make sure your assessment is one hundred percent correct"

Kaiba pulled him closer, an arm going around his waist as they kissed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing smut is soooo difficult! It took me SO MUCH TIME to get it done! I hope you liked it.   
> Comments are more than appreciated <3


	10. Gold

Kaiba woke up to an empty bed, the sheets rumpled and tangled between his legs. His hand wandered, trying to find the other man although he could tell he wasn't there. He groaned and sat up, his muscles a bit sore from the earlier activities. He was still reeling from what they had done, and the sheer amount of sensations he had experienced in just a few hours. Atem was as magnificent as he always seemed, but having him in such way was enough to keep him awake for a couple days.

It was pitch black outside, he could hear the distant rumbling of the city through the window's glass. Where had he gone? It was too early to be walking around, although that had never stopped him.

Kaiba decided to change the sheets and take a shower, feeling slightly uncomfortable inside his own skin. He had had no issue falling asleep sweaty and dirty with Atem, but being alone was different. He pulled some clothes from the closet-Mokuba hadn't packed much for them but he would make do- and placed them carefully over the freshly made bed. His fingers touched his left side, over a bruise that had been left there by _him_. It made his mouth dry. Atem had known how to do what he needed when he needed it, somehow. Like in their duels, he found just the play to keep him on edge, to thwart his plans and, for lack of a better word, dominate him. Maybe he wasn't being fair to Atem, who had been caring and thoughtful during the act... And after.

Where was he?

Kaiba looked around the room, finding himself alone, surrounded by darkness. He was about to pick up a towel when he heard a conversation, almost as if from far away. It could be anyone, and leaving the room naked wasn't exactly desirable. He hadn't shown his naked body to anyone in... Years. Not even by accident.

He picked up the past night's underwear and put it on, deciding whether to leave the room or stay.

_Fuck it._

He was about to pull open the door, when the voices became clearer in the hallway. Without turning the knob, he stood still, trying to figure out if Atem was on the other side or some of his friends were.

 _I wish my answers were different, Pharaoh_. Ishizu spoke calmly, sorrow in her voice. She always managed to sound truthful, Kaiba wondered how.

 _I understand, this isn't your fault. I..._ A pause, what was he thinking? What were they talking about? _Thank you for offering, though. I'd really like to go._

The voices were louder, and he almost stepped back from the door.

_We'll go later today then. It's all in my office._

Another pause, longer this time. Kaiba stared at the doorknob. Steps, and before he could move, the door opened. The hallway lights were almost too bright, and he squinted while his eyes adjusted. Atem was amused, dressed in shorts and a... Was that his own shirt? Kaiba swallowed, forgetting to come up with an excuse, and stared. Atem was shorter than him, so the fabric was loose on his body, the sleeves rolled up just enough to see his brown skin. If anyone saw him, they'd know they had slept together. He had love bites on his neck and was wearing _his_ shirt. _Gods_.

"Missing me already?"

His voice was deep and the smile on his tone was so palpable Kaiba almost wanted to groan.

"You wish" He pulled him closer with a hand, kissing him as they closed the door. "I was about to take a shower"

Atem touched his face, smiling "Let me join you" And he was weak on the knees again.

He moved away, feeling Atem's hands lingering on his arm and back as they walked to the bathroom.

The Pharaoh sat on the edge of the tub, his hands working the water taps. "I used to love baths" He mused, a hand feeling the temperature of the water. He didn't have to ask to know he was referring to his 'other' life.

"I rarely take baths" Kaiba leaned against the sink, staring at him.

"They're relaxing... More so with good company"

He smirked, crossing his arms over his naked chest. "So that's what you did as a Pharaoh? Lure women to your baths?"

There was a chuckle "Definitely not. This is all... Very new" his eyes held Seto's gaze.

"But it wasn't the first time you had sex" It wasn't a question, he already knew the answer. Kaiba shifted slightly, one eyebrow arched.

"No, it wasn't"

"Hm"

"It happened a _long_ time ago" Kaiba wasn't jealous, so he simply stared back at him "She was just... _There_ and I was lonely..." Atem looked down at the bathtub, closing the taps when the water reached a high enough level. The silence dragged on for a few moments. "I was different back then"

Ah.

Kaiba moved away from the sink and somehow managed to sit next to him on the edge of the tub. Their naked shoulders touched, electricity running through his skin. He wondered if it would always feel like this, or if this was part of not being touched for so long.

"Atem"

He looked up, vulnerable, young. Kaiba swallowed, unsure as to what to do or say. "You gave your life for your people. That sounds pretty much like how you are now"

The Pharaoh smiled, but it didn't last and it didn't reach his eyes. With a sigh, he rested his head on Kaiba's shoulder "I was young..." another pause, speaking about the past seemed too hard on him.

Kaiba placed an arm around his waist, the water behind them making soft noises now and again. "I don't feel young anymore"

He pulled him closer, a knot on his chest.

"Yeah, neither do I"

Then the quiet.

Eventually, it could have been five or fifteen minutes, Atem pulled away, touching the water to make sure it was still warm. He got up on his feet, taking his clothes off without saying a word. Seto followed, sliding into the bathtub first, it took him a few moments to find a comfortable position, his legs too long for it.

Atem smirked, placing himself between his legs, his back pressed to Kaiba's chest. It definitely was more comfortable for the Pharaoh than him.

Kaiba didn't mind, he placed his hands on his stomach and relaxed under the warm water, it was making wonders for his sore muscles. If he had time to do this often, he would but too many responsibilities were on his shoulders. 

"Were you truly spying on me and Ishizu?"

"No, I was about to leave the room and you were talking on the hallway" He shrugged, making some of the water spill out onto the floor.

"I had questions about... My Kingdom. My things, I suppose. And my friends"

"What does she know?"

"Not much, but I don't need a history lesson to know it's all gone" He pressed himself harder against him, and Kaiba tightened the grip on his body "She offered to show me what was inside my tomb, when they first found it they took most of the valuables to the museum. She has access"

Kaiba nodded, hearing him but slightly distracted by the way the humidity made Atem's hair stick to his skin. "That's nice of her"

"Hm" Atem rested his head on his shoulder, eyes on the ceiling. "Did you... Remember anything else?"

 _Ugh_.

"Can we... _Not_?"

There was a small frown, but he eventually nodded. Kaiba found himself running his hands on his sides and up and down his arms, mesmerized by his shape. Under his touch, the Pharaoh started to relax, eyes closed and a small smile on his lips. It was close to how he had looked when he fell asleep, right in the middle of a conversation. Seto had traced his features then, memorizing them in case anything happened, learning the way his nose curved, the length of his eyelashes, the plumpness of his lips. He was beautiful.

There was no reason to talk about the past anymore, not when his future was at hands reach. His future felt blindingly bright, almost everything he had ever hoped for. The past was the perfect way to sour everything.

"Seto?"

"Hm?" He had drifted off for a moment, resting his head against the wall "Yes?"

"I don't think we've talked about it, and I need to know if anything we did... Anything I did last night was out of line"

"No" He shrugged "Do I look like someone that'd go along with something I don't want?"

"No, but sex is..." he sighed "Yugi's right, I'm quite bad at this"

Kaiba laughed, closing his eyes again "Look, I'm not going to pretend this isn't new to me. But-" _But you know me, but it's fine, really_ "I'll tell you if something bothers me, stop fussing. It's a bit insulting"

Even though his eyes were closed, he was sure Atem had rolled his eyes at him.

The water got cold eventually, sooner than he would've liked but he moved just as well, picking up a couple towels for both of them and wrapping himself up. His back turned to Atem, he walked to the bedroom. The lights were dim and the sun hadn't appeared.

Seto tried to dry himself off without showing much of his body, which was pointless given what they had done just hours ago - but it was different now somehow. There was space between them, and he could feel Atem's eyes on his body. Was he assessing the body he had _enjoyed_ the night before? Was he worthy enough for a Pharaoh? Seto almost hated himself for how quickly his cynicism invaded his thoughts.

On the other side of the room, Atem had already picked up some clothes and was snuggling up inside the double bed. Seeing him like this -in his own body-... he almost looked too thin. Seto swallowed, seeing white linen strips wrapped around his body like a cadaver would haunt him for many, many nights. And if that wasn't enough, he had the scent of burning incense from a memory long gone burning in his nose.

Careful not to draw more attention than necessary to himself, he slid inside the covers next to him, eyes fixed on the roof above them. This wasn't something he was ready for. Small talk? Normal things couples surely did? Because they were a... thing now, weren't they? Perhaps what had happened was a onetime thing. It wouldn't surprise him.

"Who did that to you?"

Seto didn't need any clarification, aware of where his eyes had gone. Coldness washed over him, but it was easy to say things aloud when his feelings were locked down somewhere else. At the time, it had been the only way to survive. Wondering what would happen if he opened the latch and allowed some of those emotions to pour back into their respective memories was pointless.

"Gozaburo" He spoke, as if it were someone else's life "I... He-" Stammering was new, and he gritted his teeth, shifting in bed "I was tied to the chair by the neck. It was to keep me from getting distracted... It scarred because it didn't heal properly, that's all"

 _That's all._ It wasn't all, but he had buried his past along with Alcatraz.

Atem nodded, a frown on his face.

"You were always better than him, Seto, I hope you know that"

Kaiba has expected something like a 'I'm sorry', he should've known the Pharaoh would know the exact words to kick another brick off his walls. He was too speechless to say anything, although he would have liked to.

Atem leaned forward, kissing above his collarbone and right underneath the scarred tissue.

"No one would think any less of you if they saw it"

"Atem, can we please leave the therapy for... _Another century_?"

He laughed, and Seto found he loved making him laugh.

"Sure thing, I've been told I give too many speeches"

"You _do_ "

Atem had a small smile on his face, and without knowing exactly how, Seto found himself shifting in bed to find a place in between his arms. The weight around his waist felt good, and he almost could forget the difference in height. It... it was nice. Seto wasn't used to feeling _nice_ or _good_. But he had promised to stay, and so he would.

**

He didn't consider waiting outside. He could've, but Atem hadn't expressed a need to be alone for this and Ishizu simply guided both of them through the museum and into her office.

Seto didn't care about museums, they were filled with relics of the past or art he wouldn't spend a thought on but at least they were quiet.

They left before anyone got up for breakfast, Atem didn't want any questions being asked or any other company. Somehow, being the only person who would be there for him made something stir inside his chest. Something good. Something that resembled the feeling of Atem draping his arm around his naked body the night before.

Ishizu's office was even quieter than the rest of the museum, with dim lighting surely for whatever delicate pieces she held. The woman strode inside without any of the hesitation Atem showed. It was almost unbecoming of him to be this doubtful, but Seto found himself not angry at the man but worried. What had happened the past few days kept him awake at night, the logical part of his brain trying to find a calm, logical explanation. The explanation, the why, stopped being important the moment he felt Atem's hands on his skin. And as he had discovered, Atem loved to touch him. Seto hated how good it made him feel, to be that special to someone. To be-...

"This is everything we found inside your chamber" Ishizu said, hands unfolding a black cloth. The contents seemed to to shine brighter against the dark fabric, and there was silence for a long time. Atem's eyes were far away, focused solely on the small pieces of gold in front of him. Seto pretended not to look, seeing the thousands of emotions that seemed to flash through the Pharaoh's face. All of them lasting barely seconds. That, or Atem was trying to compose himself from something that was overwhelming. If Seto tried to find a similar moment, he would have to compare it to Atem seeing Osiris for the first time. Without the fear.

"I'll give you some privacy" Ishizu's words were also an invitation for him to leave the room but Seto didn't bite. He was staying.

The woman's steps became farther and farther away until they were alone, in that barely lit room, staring at old golden objects.

The silence stretched with the time, and Seto tied not to move. This was Atem's moment, good or bad, he didn't have a right to interrupt. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Atem moved one of his hands, fingers roaming the piece of cloth until they found gold. "I-" His voice was deep and hoarse, Seto saw him swallow "I bought this from one of my many unauthorized trips to town" Ever since the ceremonial duel, Seto had been plagued by a knowledge -memories? Faded, long lost, foreign- he never wished to possess. It was unfair, really, to be forced to endure something he never wanted, _again_. As if his life wasn't exactly his own.

Shifting his body, he placed a hand on Atem's lower back, feeling the tense muscles underneath. "It still fits" The small gold ring circled his third finger perfectly "This one I got when I became Pharaoh... It used to have small green stones" His voice lowered to a whisper, as his fingers traced small circular indentations on the metal. Seto gritted his teeth, images flashing inside his head, the green stones as clear as the room around them. If any of what Atem had been spewing was real -and Seto wasn't an idiot, he had enough evidence to believe most of it, if not all- then the memories he had inside his head had belonged to someone.

They weren't his, because that other man that kneeled in front of Atem and pined for a dead woman wasn't him, it simply wasn't. Thinking back, the only memory that _felt_ remotely like what he felt was the one where they kissed, but it hadn't meant anything. Atem hadn't... He swallowed, the night between them did mean something, didn't it? Seto Kaiba wasn't a pawn, he wouldn't bow down and agree to whatever Atem wanted, he was different. That had to mean _something_.

"You can take them, it's all yours" Maybe that wasn't the right thing to say. Maybe it was.

"Yes" Atem hadn't looked up, whole body tense "Yes, of course" His fingers moved over the small pieces, slowly placing some of the rings on his fingers. The shaking of his hands became more pronounced as the gold shone through. Seto wanted to reach out and hold his hands to stop that, it wasn't worthy of him to be this distraught over the past. It simply wasn't.

Atem had showed him so much -how life could be. He had defied what he believed to be true more than once -how many times? two, three?-, and yet he was so caught up in events that were long gone. Seto knew what that was. And he wouldn't allow it to ruin Atem. He just wouldn't.

But how to say things when the only way he could was with a snarky comment? He wasn't made for a soft approach, so he said nothing.

There was a soft clinking sound, yet it felt way too loud all around them, eating out every other sensation in the room. Seto gritted his teeth, and moved his arm, steadying Atem without a second thought. On the floor next to them laid two earrings, golden and proud, fit for a king. Had he thrown them? Had they fallen? He hadn't been paying attention, way too focused on his face.

What was a normal thing to say? 'It's alright'? 'Calm down'? Seto couldn't bring himself to do that, because it wasn't alright and Atem didn't need to calm down. If he needed to lash out, then he would help him.

"We can't break Ishizu's office"

Atem's breathing was hard, his hands fists over the table and his whole body as tense as Seto had ever felt him. There was an imperceptible nod - so maybe he wasn't so bad at this comforting thing.

"Let's go outside"

Atem wasn't moving, the gold making him seem even more important than he already was. It confirmed the regal air he already got, and it made something stir inside Seto's chest.

Someone else might have given him a nice speech or some kind words or a hug, but Seto wasn't like that. Could it be that Atem wanted someone like him? How could his advice be... good? He had trusted his instinct while raising Mokuba -and he knew he had done a poor job at it- but this was different.

He wasn't an idiot, he knew they could destroy each other. They were so alike, so intense, so... was Atem aware?

Maybe staying was a mistake. _Friendship_ was one thing, this was another. And Seto wasn't sure if he was ready for _this_. And what would happen to him if this didn't...? The feeling outside of the tomb and outside of the hospital had been the worst of his life. Even worse than waiting for his parents and never seeing them again. This time he understood what was going on, and he had been doing well on his own, not being dependant on anyone. To suddenly have someone, someone that _somehow_ fits you and have him taken from you? Better to not having him at all.

They strode off the museum, Seto managing to give Ishizu a excuse or two -just to get her to leave them alone. It was clear to him that he didn't need to say anything for her to understand the pharaoh hadn't taken the moment well. Who would?

The outside was bright, and it burned Seto's light eyes. Atem didn't seem bothered by it, shoulders straight, fist at his sides as he walked off the paths and towards the vast amounts of sand. Where he wanted to go, Seto had no idea, but he followed just a couple meters behind.

By the time Atem stopped walking, he couldn't see any buildings around them -new or old. There was sand, the sun and well, _plants or something._ Seto didn't really care about that, he was focused on the shape in front of him.

Atem eventually turned, running a hand through his hair and letting the air leave his lungs. When their eyes met, Seto noticed the surprise on his face. Had he not expected him to be there? He couldn't blame him.

"I need a moment" Atem spoke, raising his chin just enough to show he hadn't lost his pride. That this event hadn't shaken him to his core, that he was alright. Or he would be.

"Yes" Seto placed his hands inside his pockets, the Egyptian sun burning his clothes and making him feel flustered -he wouldn't complain.

There was too much they still needed to discuss, they had been dancing around all of it ever since Atem got better. Seto prided himself on not being scared of anything, he had already seen the worst humanity had to offered -and survived it- and yet... he dreaded the talk.

The memories... no, the _knowledge_ was there. He knew who that other person had been, but he would never -could never- become him. And, truth be told, he tried _very hard_ not to focus on the fact that that _other_ person Atem somehow thought was related to him had been his _cousin._ It was way too weird, even for him.

Not that they had known they were cousins, and it wasn't like they had had a _thing,_ or at least not to his knowledge. But Atem hadn't told him his side yet, had he? Was he pining for a dead _relative_? Seto truly hoped not. And what did he think about that, anyway? His curiosity almost made him open his mouth. But this wasn't the moment to talk about it. And if he asked him about any of it, Atem would ask him things as well. And he didn't want to talk about those.

A moment. They needed a moment.

They had that now. Just for a little while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! I'm truly sorry it took this long to update, I'm on my last year of college - and it's an internship and honestly it's been very hard on me psychologically and physically so I've been having a hard time finding time to sit down and write, even if the ideas are in my head! So I won't lie to you all, it will probably be a while before I update again -depending on the levels of stress!- but I'm working on this and I will complete it.  
> Please leave a comment if you can, they are truly motivating <3


	11. Compass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Chapter 11

The sun was high up in the blue sky, drenching the sand with light and forcing Seto to keep his eyes focused on the pharaoh. They had been silent for a while, and Atem had walked towards a piece of stone coming from the ground, sitting with his back against it. Each time he moved, the sun made the gold on his fingers shine bright, so bright it could light up the whole world. 

He didn't have that same brightness on his face. 

Seto walked forward, feeling how warm his clothes were -and how they started to get stuck against his skin,  _disgusting_ \- and sat next to him. The idea of having sand on his clothes didn't bother him as much as he thought it would. At least it wasn't on his  _skin_ .

"You remember" Atem muttered, his back against an old piece of stone, eyes fixed on the sand stretching out in front of them "you know so much more than me"

Why did it always have to be like this? Why did he always have to bring this up? Whoever that man that had shared his face and name had been, it wasn't him. 

"I don't remember" he tried to keep his tone kind, or at least not as harsh as it sounded in his head "I guess I 'know' some aspects of this shared delusion, yes"

"Delusion," Atem's lips twitched upwards just for a moment "That's what you want to call it then" There was resignation in him, and Seto almost wanted to fight it.

"That's what it..." a pause, a moment to reconsider. Fine, maybe it wasn't a delusion, maybe having the object of his desires next to him as a separate entity from the other Yugi was some sort of proof. "...what I believe it to be"

The warm desert wind brushed them, almost making him wish for lighter clothes. Almost. It still wasn't enough for him to show any skin in public.

Atem wasn't looking at him, eyes set on some distant spot ahead. Or behind them, many, many years before.

"I know who I am, and I know those memories are my own. The ones of the true events, not the ones everyone saw" He mumbled, his deep voice taking a lower tone, almost as if he was trying very hard not to be affected by it. "We both remember it. Why do you believe yours are delusions?"

"You take them as your own, I don't. I suddenly know these facts, these dates and names and people but I don't remember it" Atem looked at him then, gaze intense but free of anger. It almost took his breath away "Do you want to know what I remember?" A small nod, his body shifting just enough to be closer to Kaiba without touching him. He liked those reactions. "I remember being ten and having to rock Mokuba back to sleep because he had had a nightmare about us getting separated. I remember the first million I made. I remember that time I hurt you and your friends. And the time you-... Whatever those other things are, they aren't my memories. They are just facts in my head. White noise. And I can't have that"

"But you do know what happened, before and after my death"

And during, his mind added and something clutched at his heart with such strength he suddenly wanted to be back inside four walls instead of there, despite them being completely alone.

"Yes"

"Mind sharing? About Mana and Isis... I-... They were..."

"I know" Seto sighed, and rubbed a hand against his forehead, the desert heat was no good for his complexion. "They... As far as I'm aware of they didn't die. I suppose they eventually did, what I'm saying is-"

"They outlived you"

He pressed his lips together, the back of his shirt starting to stick itself against his skin. "Sure"

Atem had gone silent again, his eyes focused on the sand nearby, as if by staring he could uncover the secrets of the universe. The sun made his brown skin shine in a way that made him even more of a king. Seto tried not to look, not to feel so attracted to him as he was, but he couldn't. Not now, and not after the night they had had. Atem was there, and he was real. And all the white noise in his head wasn't enough to drown what he felt.

Feelings. What a tedious concept.

Despite his better judgment, he was aware he wouldn't be able to walk away now. And even if he somehow managed to turn away from Atem, there would always be something missing. Which was why he needed to know.

"Atem, I-" Seto was interrupted by a sudden touch against his lips, and he looked down. Atem placed a couple fingers on his lips, his big eyes staring right into his soul. Like always.

"Shh. Seto, listen to me.. And listen carefully." Seto nodded, closing his mouth and trying not to feel as if he was about to be dumped for the memory of a dead man. "I only want whatever you are willing to give freely and at your own time" What? Seto tried to wrap his head around his words but he was slightly dazed by the way Atem stared into his eyes. "If my questions are intense it's only because all of this is... New to me"

_Scared, he's scared. It doesn't suit him to be scared._ A strong desire to make it better filled him, a need to just grab Atem by the shoulders and calm him down. The world was a scary place, but they were scarier.

"You can't have him"

"What?"

Seto swallowed, hating how he always spoke more than he should in front of him. "That man you ask me so much about, you can't have him. He's not me. And if it's him you are after then I-..."

"Seto," his voice was soft and low and Seto leaned towards him, hunching just a bit. "what the hell are you on about? I already told you it's you I want"

"You-"

"No. You need to understand. If you are going to be with me while doubting my true feelings and thinking I'm just trying to fuck a copy of-... You insult me"

"Insult you? It's... I saw it. I saw you two kissing. I... I saw.. I watched while-"

"What? What did you see?"

"You! Dying!" Seto moved back, hands pressing against the hot sand for a moment before getting up and giving a few steps away from him. "I saw you die! I... I felt him, how heartbroken he was"

Atem's eyes were wide open as he got up, but he didn't walk towards him. "I'm sorry you had to see that. I remember being there. It was nice having a friend nearby"

"That wasn't just a friend"

Atem sighed "True, he was my cousin. Which makes this conversation all the more difficult for you. Am I right?"

"Yes!"

"We're not cousins now, Seto"

"Of course we aren't!"

Atem sighed, a small smile on the corner of his lips "And this is perfectly fine"

"I know it is!"

"Aha. And you are allowed to be cared for"

"Wh-...?"

"And I do like you for who  _you_ are"

Seto stared down at him, hands next to his body, unmoving. What was he on about? He had... Totally, completely, absolutely missed his point. Atem wasn't-...

He gave a couple steps towards the Pharaoh, and held his face in between his hands. For a brief moment he thought about speaking his mind and telling Atem just how wrong he was.

Instead, he kissed him. There was a low, pleased 'hm' from the man and Seto pressed his body against Atem's. He was firm, and Seto liked the way it felt when they kissed like this, even if he had to lean down.

There was a gush of wind and Seto broke the kiss, instinctively hiding his face against his neck to protect it from the sand. How could someone live in a desert? It was inhumane. Atem laughed, a hand on his back and his warm cheek pressed against his head.

"It's just a bit of sand, Seto"

" _A little?_ "

"Hm, and here I was thinking about pining you against those rocks over there"

Seto whimpered, shaking his head and pressing him tighter against his body, trying to hide his expression. "No."

"Fine, fine... But there's one more place I want to go"

Atem pulled away, hands on the sides of his hips and a small smile on his face. "I promise it's not too far away"

"Let's go back and get the car"

"No, let's walk. I still remember the way"

**

_The warm wind that usually woke him didn't. He hadn't been able to fall asleep at all. Which was unusual._

_It wasn't the bed, which was perfect as usual. And it wasn't the company. The warm body next to him, small and delicate under a simple linen sheet hadn't changed._

_His mind was restless._

_Pressing a kiss to her temple, he got up and left his quarters. It would be better not to disturb anyone, not that he actually needed the sleep. But the ritual was good enough._

_"Can't sleep?"_

_He didn't stop, sitting on a bench outside the Palace, under the night sky. Stars shining bright as they usually did._

_"Obviously"_

_Steps._

_Seto looked up at the woman who now stood next to him. "And you?"_

_She shook his head, and sat down. "I keep thinking about..."_

_"Yes"_

_"He should be here" Seto said, anger in his tone. A feeling he had almost forgotten._

_The silence stretched between them, as the stars shone. As the wind blew. As everything remained the same as it always did._

_"Yes, he should be" Isis reached for the necklace that was no longer there, and her hand hovered for a few moments over her long neck. Seto didn't mean to stare. "And he will be... I just don't know when"_

_"We saw him"_

_"It's not so simple" She turned to face him "Afterlife isn't..."_

_"Yes. It's not simple, I know"_

_More silence. Clouds forming in the distance. A storm? Another unusual thing in their eternal paradise._

_"Kisara?"_

_"Asleep. I should..."_

_"Yes, you should"_

_Seto didn't move. The afterlife wasn't simple. It had never been._

_**_

"Here's where I-... And I-..." Atem had a smile on his face, hands pointing at the air, trying to explain the things he had seen. Structures and faces that were no longer there. Seto hid his hands on his pockets, following the erratic movements, mesmerized by the smile he had on. "Father used to get so angry at me... and the market was right over there!"

"How can you know that?" As far as his eyes could see, there was only sand around them. 

Atem chuckled, walking farther away, his shoulders straight and his head high. There wasn't an ounce of insecurity or sadness, he wasn't the same man that had left the museum. Seto felt like he was following a king. And it made him uncomfortable. His heartbeat quickened.

"I could walk this place with my eyes closed and know exactly where everything was. I... I remember  _everything_ " He didn't bother looking over his shoulder, probably aware that he was being followed.

Seto tried to imagine the things Atem said. The things he had seen but still kept in a isolated place inside his brain. 

"I wish I could show you... There used to be this woman-...!" He laughed, stopping at a point that seemed of no particular interest to Seto "She used to sell these... beautiful jewels. They weren't like the ones they made for me at the palace. They weren't expensive enough but... I loved them."

It was a pretty memory, if only it weren't already buried by the sand and the millennia. Seto didn't know what to do, or what to say. He didn't see anything when he stared at the vastness of the desert. And he didn't have the heart to say anything either. He didn't want Atem to go back to that deep obscure sadness that seemed to grab at him at the oddest of times.

"Oh, father used to get so angry at me... and so worried. But he wasn't right. I should've been out more. I should've seen my people more closely..."

"There's no way to change that now."

Atem nodded, walking back to him, his feet never wavering in the sand. Even in the smallest of details it was clear that he belonged there. This was his home. Where was Seto's home?

"Thank you, for being here with me."

He nodded, "No problem."

"I promise I'll repay you for this" Atem smiled, blindingly bright and places a hand on Seto's arm.

"You don't have to." 

There was a moment of peace and quiet, and then Atem moved away from him, eyes roaming the desert. If there was something he was trying to find, Seto had no clue what it was. He tried to picture how it all must have looked, all those centuries ago, but he failed. Did Atem felt the same? Did he feel he didn't belong there, with them?

If Seto accepted that all of that Egypt crap was real -and he was almost about to accept that perhaps  _some_ of it was true- then Atem had to understand where his place was. He belonged  _with them_ , right then and there. Otherwise, if Destiny was real, why would it bring him to them?

If everything is already planned -which is the one thing he will never believe- like Atem wants to think, then why would he think things aren't like they should be?

That he's not exactly where he should be?

"We should go back," Seto said, the sun was high up on the blue sky, making him feel like his skin was about to melt from his bones. It wasn't a great look. "we've been out here for too long."

Atem's back was turned to him, but there was a small nod, his hands restless by his sides. He could see his fingers playing mindlessly with the rings on them, a habit that was all him, probably acquired from years of wearing them. Had anyone else noticed that already? 

"Yes, you are right." And there was a tone now as well, one that seemed exactly what a monarch would use with his subjects. Seto tried not to be  _too_ pissed. This was an emotional moment, and Atem... was on the edge. Wasn't he? There had been few times when Seto had seen him like he did on the museum. On edge. 

He knew what it was like to rearrange your whole mind, to take the pieces and try and see how they all fit. 

"Your friends are surely wondering where you are, they'll be insufferable if-" Seto closed his eyes, feeling the warmness over his lips. How could Atem be so fast? And how could he kiss him so easily, with no hesitation now? 

"I know. Let's go." 

There was a small warm touch on his cheek, and then Atem was walking away from him -as if he had done nothing to him just seconds ago-, with no compass and no map, yet somehow he knew Atem wouldn't get lost out there. They would find their way back. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so so sorry for the delay. This is my last year of med school which is extremely hard on me. I'm working 12 and sometimes 24 hour shifts, and I used to write in bed but right now if my head touches the pillow then... I'm out. I've been writting this piece by piece, and I'm already working on the next chapter. I wanted this to be longer, but it would take me ages so I've decided to make it a bit shorter so I can update faster. I promise to try and update more frequently. I miss writing my boys.  
> This WILL be finished and updated asap, I promise.  
> Anyways! Hope to read your comments, they really do motivate me >)

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed!  
> FIY: My first language isn't english, and I don't have a beta so there will be some mistakes sometimes. I'm trying my best not to make a lot of them.
> 
> Please leave a comment if you can!


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